update on my saga,, HELP

Re: the ex-wife trying to move with kids from VA to FL to get married, also wants to increase cs.
We have had a couple of sit downs to try to negotiate the visitation and cs stuff. We came up with an almost reasonable agreement that she ran by her lawyer, who vetoed most everything, and made threats such as she had originally used the shared parenting guidelines, but if I don't salute and stand to attention by tomorrow at noon, she will go by regular cs guidelines. Which is more than double the shared, so she says....Can she do that?
Also they only want the kids to come visit for 2 weeks, two times during the summer, part of Christmas, Easter, but then say I should go to FL to visit the kids in Oct and Feb,(at my expense) instead of the kids flying to me. HUH??? Ex says kids don't know why I can't come see them, why do they have to travel? She only wants them on non-stop flights, meaning I have to drive almost 4 hours one way to get them at airport. I don't want to go to court with a custody battle (that seems pretty traumatizing for a kid), don't want the kids to have to come testify in court and be forced take take sides. I don't want them flying alone and scared for visitation, but good grief! I will be seeing my lawyer tomorrow morning about this, but I am frantic. I cannot think straight! Help!

[LegalBeagle]

They are trying to screw you. Take your details to your attorney and state the least you want is much more visitation, for them to come to you and for her to pay for it.

Remember, you have a good relationship with the children and she is tearing them away and now telling you exactly when you can see them, how and also making you pay.

You go Boy!!!, See *the dad* you need an aggressive attorney like LB here to fight this thing for you. Just remember you have rights too!!

[LegalBeagle]

By the way.. have you calculated how many days a year the children spend with you ? How many overnight visits etc..

The reason is, that they can not decide to file a petition under a different set of guidelines just because they feel like it. You have to show change between the original order and now.

.

I have the kids 33% of the time. I do believe my lawyer is agressive, but he is letting things go til the last minute, and it is making me nervous!! I want to resolve this amicably.
Her lawyer requested pay stubs for me from my lawyer which he ignored, since she already had that info and had already worked up a calculation. Is this normal lawyer stuff?
I have never really dealt with lawyers or been faced with going to court before. This is very new to me.

[LegalBeagle]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by the dad:
[b]I have the kids 33% of the time. I do believe my lawyer is agressive, but he is letting things go til the last minute, and it is making me nervous!! I want to resolve this amicably.
Her lawyer requested pay stubs for me from my lawyer which he ignored, since she already had that info and had already worked up a calculation. Is this normal lawyer stuff?
I have never really dealt with lawyers or been faced with going to court before. This is very new to me.[/b]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Here are some daytime reading for you...

An excellant site.. [url="http://www.denbighlaw.com/childsupport_statute.html"]http://www.denbighlaw.com/childsupport_statute.html[/url]

More [url="http://www.woodsrogers.com/articles/famlaw2.htm"]http://www.woodsrogers.com/articles/famlaw2.htm[/url]

The key is 90 days.. if you can show/prove that you have the children for more than 90 days then they can not just change it as they like.

Thanks Legal Beagle! My calculations do not come up the same as her lawyer's calculations. Thanks for the links.
Do you think it is better to let it go to court, or try to come to an agreement on our own, which does not look hopeful. Her lawyer doesn't appear to be considering any fair visitation. Just threats, and more threats.
Will the kids have to come to court? What kind of questions would they ask a 10 and 12 yr old?

[LegalBeagle]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by the dad:
[b]Thanks Legal Beagle! My calculations do not come up the same as her lawyer's calculations. Thanks for the links.
Do you think it is better to let it go to court, or try to come to an agreement on our own, which does not look hopeful. Her lawyer doesn't appear to be considering any fair visitation. Just threats, and more threats.
Will the kids have to come to court? What kind of questions would they ask a 10 and 12 yr old?[/b]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

If it is not a custody issue then it is unlikely the kids will be involved.

From the little you have told me it looks like your going to court. I would suggest that you put together a proposal stating exactly what you want in terms of visitation and travel costs. Send it to her with the underlying tone that this is what you want and if you do not get it, then you will have to go to court and you will oppose the move to protect your relationship with the children.