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aunt & uncle in AL

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mbc

Junior Member
Alabama - Our nephew is 16 years old. Both his mom and dad live in the same city as us. They have been divorced for more than 10 years. His mom has full custody. Both of his parents have now abandoned him and have no desire to raise him and do not provide any financial support. His mom is hopping from hotel to hotel with her boyfriend in order to avoid bill collectors. She has also been in jail because she was caught wondering the road in the middle of the night intoxicated. She kept missing her court date and end up being covicted to 1 month in jail. His dad is living in a trash dump and driving without a license because it was taken away because he is a declared by Alabama as a "dead beat dad" for not paying child support. He is temporarily living with my parents (his grandparents). They have been granted temp power of attorney. They are both over the age of 66 and are not really in any physical or mental state to raise a teenager. My wife and I are wanting to get full custody of him so we can raise him and give him the home that he needs. Is there any legal way that we can take both parents to court and prove them both unfit as parents and get full custody? He's a good kid and needs a stable home environment.

My wife and I want to get all the information that we can get on this. He is a very bright, sweet, intelligent kid but we are afraid that he is getting involved with a bad set of kids. He has never had any real parenting and my parents (his grandparents) are afraid to lay down any laws because they are afraid to "rock the boat". We have tried to tell them that something needs to be done and we need to get full custody of him so that we can call the shots. He needs to get some professional help and some counseling but they say they can't do that because his mom controls his Medicaid card. They think that we can't legally go to court to get custody because his parents are both alive and if we prove them both unfit, he will be put into a foster home. We just don't believe that could be possible as long as he has living relatives who are willing to take care of him. Would we have any chance of getting custody according to Alabama Law?
 


Farfalla

Member
This be tough and is definately not a DIY thing. have you spoken to any attornies?

That's where you need to start. If money is an issue you can probably find 4 or 5 attornies to interview who don't charge for an inital consultation. Than you can pick the one who you feel will hanld your case well (not necessarilly the one who tells you what you want to hear).

By the way, how does mom control medicaid if the grandparents have power of attorney?

One thing to consider, he's 16. There are only 2 years left to 'raise him. And that assumes that he just turned 16. After that you don't need custody to help him out. The case for custody might take a good hunk of that 2 years.
 
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mbc

Junior Member
We have no idea why she controls the medicaid card. We have tried to tell them to just tell her to give it to them. I think alot of the problem right now is they just don't know what they are and aren't allowed to do legally and are afraid if they deny something then they will lose the "power of attorney". They are not getting any help from the state to help raise him but I have a feeling that somehow his mom is still getting something (foodstamps, etc) even though he is not with her. His dad (the one who doesn't have the driver's license) claims that money is being taken out of his paycheck. We don't believe him but if that's the case, then where is the money going? It can't be going to his mom because she is hopping from hotel to hotel. Both of his parents lie all the time and unfortunately he has learned to do that to. We have thought about the fact that he only has 2 years left but he has 3 years of high schoo leftl. He's just a sophmore. Our main concern is that we need something set up legally so that we can call ALL the shots and don't have to worry that we can't do this or that because it's not "legal" when in reality we don't know if it is or not. Like for instance, our nephew is extremely allergic to smoke and it is in his divorce cree that he is not suppose to be around it when he is with his dad. His dad still smokes around him, he lives in a 1 bedroom appartment where he uses the floor as a garbage can and he drives him around even though his license has been suspended. My parents are afraid to say no to visition because they think the dad has the right to see him even though "he" is breaking the law. The bottom line is that neither one of them want to raise him and neither one of them want to provide ANY financial support but yet they both want to "see him" and tell him that they "love" him? I'm sorry but that's not love. It's not a matter of they can't financially support him - it's a matter of they don't want to change their personal life to include him. They wan't that responsibility to be with someone else. That's why we don't either one of them to have any kind of custody over him and we want to determine the visitation rights.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
We have no idea why she controls the medicaid card. We have tried to tell them to just tell her to give it to them. I think alot of the problem right now is they just don't know what they are and aren't allowed to do legally and are afraid if they deny something then they will lose the "power of attorney". They are not getting any help from the state to help raise him but I have a feeling that somehow his mom is still getting something (foodstamps, etc) even though he is not with her. His dad (the one who doesn't have the driver's license) claims that money is being taken out of his paycheck. We don't believe him but if that's the case, then where is the money going? It can't be going to his mom because she is hopping from hotel to hotel. Both of his parents lie all the time and unfortunately he has learned to do that to. We have thought about the fact that he only has 2 years left but he has 3 years of high schoo leftl. He's just a sophmore. Our main concern is that we need something set up legally so that we can call ALL the shots and don't have to worry that we can't do this or that because it's not "legal" when in reality we don't know if it is or not. Like for instance, our nephew is extremely allergic to smoke and it is in his divorce cree that he is not suppose to be around it when he is with his dad. His dad still smokes around him, he lives in a 1 bedroom appartment where he uses the floor as a garbage can and he drives him around even though his license has been suspended. My parents are afraid to say no to visition because they think the dad has the right to see him even though "he" is breaking the law. The bottom line is that neither one of them want to raise him and neither one of them want to provide ANY financial support but yet they both want to "see him" and tell him that they "love" him? I'm sorry but that's not love. It's not a matter of they can't financially support him - it's a matter of they don't want to change their personal life to include him. They wan't that responsibility to be with someone else. That's why we don't either one of them to have any kind of custody over him and we want to determine the visitation rights.
He will still be a legal adult when he turns 18, even if he has another year of high school left.

The best bet would be to get both parents to agree to give you legal custody. However, mom is likely to avoid that if she is receiving any benefits for the child.
 

Farfalla

Member
See a attorney if you are determined to try this. Just realize it can cost a lot and might not result in what you want.

There are things that can be done to help your case. When dad shows up do drive son with an expired license, your parents could call the police and let them handle dad driving without a license.

You can talk to your sister about the medicaid card. Maybe she will understand that the grandparents need it to take him to the doctors. A duplicate card can be ordered so mom has one and grandma does too.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
See a attorney if you are determined to try this. Just realize it can cost a lot and might not result in what you want.

There are things that can be done to help your case. When dad shows up do drive son with an expired license, your parents could call the police and let them handle dad driving without a license.

You can talk to your sister about the medicaid card. Maybe she will understand that the grandparents need it to take him to the doctors. A duplicate card can be ordered so mom has one and grandma does too.
In my state medicaid will NOT allow a duplicate card to be issued. However, the child would show up in the state medicaid database and the child could be seen via that. I have taken my granddaughter to the ER a couple of times, without having her medicaid card in hand. They just looked her up.

Anyway, my point is that it may not be possible to get a duplicate card.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Since the child is not LIVING with mother, if the grandparents report mom to medicaid/welfare, they will do an investigation, and most likely have mom prosecuted for fraud. I have seen it happen.
 

TheGeekess

Keeper of the Kraken
Per AG Troy King:
“Just as before, consumers have to be vigilant and careful. Medicaid ID numbers and cards should be kept in a safe place and should never be used by anyone other than the assigned recipient. It is against the law to sell, alter or lend a Medicaid card or number, and those who do so may lose their Medicaid benefits and face prosecution. We are committed to protecting Medicaid benefits for the actual recipients who are entitled to them, by prosecuting identity theft as well as theft or misuse of Medicaid benefits.”
http://www.fullidentity.com/Default.aspx?Page=NewsArticles&NID=66&ContentID=

For more information on Alabama Medicaid:
Alabama Medicaid
 

Farfalla

Member
I would think that in this case, the child is the recipient. Thus the card should go with the child.

My stepson was on medicaid for a while. He had a card in his own name. When he was in our home it has here with him. When his mother was visiting town, it went with him.

And yes he was in the database so the card was not always needed.
 

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