Grandparent rights

[blueboy45]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arkansas U.S. and State Laws
I am having trouble with a grandparent who resides in California and I reside in Arkansas. I have full custody of children and have had it for the past 13 plus years. All these years my ex wife's mother has barely made contact with her grand kids up until the oldest was almost 18teen. Through the years I tried to make it a point to communicate with the grandparent about how the children were doing and the children were having phone conversations at least twice a month. My children s ages are now 15, 17 and 18. (The 18 year old ran off with a boy after graduation, at least she graduated, that's another issue.) However, my other two are into a lot of activities during the Fall all the way through Spring and that has been so for as long as I can remember. Now the grandparent has gone completely mad calling every week end and when no one is home to answer she sends the police to the house. Now she is threatening "Grandparents" rights because the kids are not talking to her every week end because they are busy and she thinks that I am holding them back. Can she sue for grandparents rights? If you need more info I will be more than glad to give it.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by blueboy45

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arkansas U.S. and State Laws
I am having trouble with a grandparent who resides in California and I reside in Arkansas. I have full custody of children and have had it for the past 13 plus years. All these years my ex wife's mother has barely made contact with her grand kids up until the oldest was almost 18teen. Through the years I tried to make it a point to communicate with the grandparent about how the children were doing and the children were having phone conversations at least twice a month. My children s ages are now 15, 17 and 18. (The 18 year old ran off with a boy after graduation, at least she graduated, that's another issue.) However, my other two are into a lot of activities during the Fall all the way through Spring and that has been so for as long as I can remember. Now the grandparent has gone completely mad calling every week end and when no one is home to answer she sends the police to the house. Now she is threatening "Grandparents" rights because the kids are not talking to her every week end because they are busy and she thinks that I am holding them back. Can she sue for grandparents rights? If you need more info I will be more than glad to give it.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Oh she can try, yes.

But without an established relationship she's probably wasting her money trying - if she wishes though, she can see the kids on her daughter's time.

(is there a reason she can't see them when they're with Mom?)

[blueboy45]

O.K. the reason that GP can't see when they are with the mother is because they haven't been able to see her because of distance. And for the reason that M had not kept in contact up until recently. I tried to keep GP informed religiously all these years and tried to get the children to communicate with GP as much as possible, but I can't force something like that now because the kids are older. GP thinks that I'm holding them back.

[blueboy45]

Really, what can GP do? Besides sending the police to my door every week end. I now make a pot of coffee for the officers. The remaining two kids are 15teen and 17teen. If they choose not to talk to grandparent all I can do is try to be an influence not an enforcer. Aren't the two kids old enough to say yay or nay?

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by blueboy45

O.K. the reason that GP can't see when they are with the mother is because they haven't been able to see her because of distance. And for the reason that M had not kept in contact up until recently. I tried to keep GP informed religiously all these years and tried to get the children to communicate with GP as much as possible, but I can't force something like that now because the kids are older. GP thinks that I'm holding them back.

Well, that's kind of tough luck - and I'm not saying that to be mean towards the GPs.

I would be very doubtful the grandparents can sue you for visitation in this instance and the fact that Mom isn't local to them is not your problem.

It would appear that the GPs do not (at least on the surface from what you've written so far) meet the Arkansas criteria giving them standing to sue for visitation (assuming AK would have jurisdiction - you and the children have all lived there a while, yes?)

[url]http://www.arkleg.state.ar.us/bureau/Publications/Arkansas%20Code/Title%209.pdf[/url]

(this is the relevant part: 9-13-103. Visitation rights of grandparents when the child is in the custody of a parent - scroll down until you find it)

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by blueboy45

Really, what can GP do? Besides sending the police to my door every week end. I now make a pot of coffee for the officers. The remaining two kids are 15teen and 17teen. If they choose not to talk to grandparent all I can do is try to be an influence not an enforcer. Aren't the two kids old enough to say yay or nay?

Nobody is going to force the kids to have a relationship with their grandparents in this situation.

Again, I doubt they even meet the criteria giving them the right to sue let alone actually prevailing in such a suit.

[blueboy45]

Yes the kids and I have lived here in Arkansas since they we're born and mother gave me full custody rights all through the Ark. court also Ark. has jurisdiction. In the beginning she took them to California for 8 mos. and then got into trouble. She called me up to get the kids, gave them up. thanks for the advice.

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by blueboy45

Yes the kids and I have lived here in Arkansas since they we're born and mother gave me full custody rights all through the Ark. court also Ark. has jurisdiction. In the beginning she took them to California for 8 mos. and then got into trouble. She called me up to get the kids, gave them up. thanks for the advice.

You're welcome!

But stop by again tomorrow as there are a few other posters who have much more experience with grandparent/third party visitation issues and might think of something which hasn't yet been discussed, k?

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by blueboy45

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arkansas U.S. and State Laws
I am having trouble with a grandparent who resides in California and I reside in Arkansas. I have full custody of children and have had it for the past 13 plus years. All these years my ex wife's mother has barely made contact with her grand kids up until the oldest was almost 18teen. Through the years I tried to make it a point to communicate with the grandparent about how the children were doing and the children were having phone conversations at least twice a month. My children s ages are now 15, 17 and 18. (The 18 year old ran off with a boy after graduation, at least she graduated, that's another issue.) However, my other two are into a lot of activities during the Fall all the way through Spring and that has been so for as long as I can remember. Now the grandparent has gone completely mad calling every week end and when no one is home to answer she sends the police to the house. Now she is threatening "Grandparents" rights because the kids are not talking to her every week end because they are busy and she thinks that I am holding them back. Can she sue for grandparents rights? If you need more info I will be more than glad to give it.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Technically, she probably has standing to sue for gpv, but it would be a pointless exercise on her part due to the children's ages.

GPV is all about the children, and yours are more than old enough to decide what kind of contact, and how much contact that they have with any third party, even a grandparent. No judge is going to impose any kind of "schedule" against their will.

She would also have to file in your state, which would be an expensive and time consuming proposition for her. I think that you are going to find that its an empty threat.

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Can't remember the poster who was having problems with an X calling the police on wellness checks. Didn't they land up flagging their household in some regard?

[blueboy45]

About the wellness check thing. It is not really an issue with me for the simple reason that I am not doing anything wrong physically or mentally to my half grown teens. Anyone can come over anytime to check them, DHS, Police whoever, I have nothing to hide. However, when my kids are in bed which is between 9 and 10 pm and I get a visit from the local police I kinda see a problem with that, by having to wake up the kids in order for the wellness check. How many times is it possible for a wellness check before it starts to become harassing or does it?

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by blueboy45

About the wellness check thing. It is not really an issue with me for the simple reason that I am not doing anything wrong physically or mentally to my half grown teens. Anyone can come over anytime to check them, DHS, Police whoever, I have nothing to hide. However, when my kids are in bed which is between 9 and 10 pm and I get a visit from the local police I kinda see a problem with that, by having to wake up the kids in order for the wellness check. How many times is it possible for a wellness check before it starts to become harassing or does it?

The police will eventually get to the point where they will stop making the checks. Since grandma is so far away its unlikely that any action for harassment would be taken against her.

When did the grandparents start this behavior? Do you have any idea what sparked them to start calling every weekend and calling the police?

[blueboy45]

It is really a very long story, however it was sparked by my oldest daughter when she turned 18. My oldest has never been very honest much like her mother and very much to my dismay. I theorized that if children are raised in an honest caring home environment with complete honesty, moral and ethical up bringing that they would turn out fairly reasonable productive adults. I am wrong, when children come that golden age of 18 they can turn either way by the decisions that they choose to make and whether or not to listen to wise advice. My daughter chose to listen to Grandma and to go out and sow her oats so to speak, that is what GP supported daughter on. I showed my daughter with facts, other peoples experiences and logical reasoning that the way she was going was going to turn out not so good and that I would not support her on her endeavor. So, she told grandma that I tossed her out and that I did not want her to make her own choices. Fact was daughter was looking for work and part time college in my face but then sneaked out of the house in the middle of night to be with this boy. So, now the GP thinks that I am "batting down the hatches" so to speak with the other two. I already several times explained to GP that I was not, LOL, the other two so it seems, have a great head on their shoulders and I am very proud of their accomplishments. However, each time the other two talk to grandma she is putting me down or trying to undermine my not supporting my oldest daughter being a live in girlfriend. The boy already has two children from other girlfriends, what does that say about how he is? Anyhow, my daughter is now angry at me and filling GP head full of manure and trying to drag the other two in it. Now the other two do not want to be in it, they want to let the issue with older sister to be left alone, years from now or months she will see how this boy really is. And then I believe that she will remember the one's who gave sound advice and the one's who said "Go do what you want" know what I mean?