Grandparent suing to see grandchildren?

[hmc8982]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana

I'm needing some advice...

My FIL, who is extremely unstable.. won't keep a job.. can't hold onto a relationship.. about a year ago, he got his CDL and took a trucking job. This took him away from home for the whole year.. he only came home like 3 times.. and most of the time we had pretty short notice. But we still worked it out to go to dinner and meet with him.. my husband, our son and I.. the thing is my husband has 2 boys from a previous marriage which we have every other weekend. And every time he was in town, just those 3 times, we didn't have the boys. A couple of them were even during the day at lunch time when the boys were in school.. and we live an hour from the boys anyway.... it just wasn't possible. But we in no way, shape or form were denying him the chance to see his grandkids. Like I said.. we always got together with him when he was here. But, it isn't our fault he took a trucking job and was never home... and it didn't work out, right?

Well, apparently he called and left a message last night and we got it this morning. He told us how he had quit his job (again) and was back in town and then demanded to see the boys. Well we already had Father's Day plans and couldn't. So my husband called him and told him that we already had plans and then told him we would be happy to get together with him the next weekend we have them in 2 weeks.. no problem. He just sighed and agreed. Then we found out he stalked my husbands ex and went to her work.. she wasn't there at the time.. but he talked to a co worker of hers and demanded that she give my husbands ex his phone number to call him because he wanted to see the boys today. Well.. we still had them and hadn't even dropped them off yet. She gets the message and tells us about it when we drop them off.

My husband then calls him to talk about it and his dad starts telling us how his girlfriend of the moment is suing her daughter to see her grandkids and threatened to do it to us. I feel like this is completely ridiculous and bogus, but I wanted to ask. Can he even sue for that?? I mean I know he could go to an attorney, but would it even go anywhere? Would they even listen to him? We can't help that he took a job trucking all over the country and was never home... we met with him every time he was here, and were sorry it didn't work out to see the other boys.. but we couldn't help it. And are willing to get together the next weekend we have them. I mean I understand that he is upset that he hasn't seen them.. but suing??? We have never kept him from seeing them.. even though he hasn't been a HUGE part of their lives over the past few years. I don't know. I guess I'm just looking for a little reassurance about this.

Thanks for your help!

 

[justalayman]

IC 31-17-5-1
Right to seek visitation
Sec. 1. (a) A child's grandparent may seek visitation rights if:
(1) the child's parent is deceased;
(2) the marriage of the child's parents has been dissolved in Indiana; or
(3) subject to subsection (b), the child was born out of wedlock.
(b) A court may not grant visitation rights to a paternal grandparent of a child who is born out of wedlock under subsection (a)(3) if the child's father has not established paternity in relation to the child.
As added by P.L.1-1997, SEC.9.

IC 31-17-5-2
Best interest of the child; in chambers interview of the child
Sec. 2. (a) The court may grant visitation rights if the court determines that visitation rights are in the best interests of the child.
(b) In determining the best interests of the child under this section, the court may consider whether a grandparent has had or has attempted to have meaningful contact with the child.
(c) The court may interview the child in chambers to assist the court in determining the child's perception of whether visitation by a grandparent is in the best interests of the child.
(d) The court may permit counsel to be present at the interview. If counsel is present:
(1) a record may be made of the interview; and
(2) the interview may be made part of the record for purposes of appeal.
As added by P.L.1-1997, SEC.9. Amended by P.L.15-2004, SEC.3.

IC 31-17-5-3

. Can he even sue for that??

yes he can.


http://www.in.gov/legislative/ic/code/title31/ar17/ch5.html

 

[hmc8982]

okay.. so he could for my step children, but not for our child together since my husband and I are together?

But I still don't see how he has anything that would ever hold up. We have never denied him of anything.. He was gone for a year trucking and was only home for limited times. And we have agreed to meet with him to see them the next time we have them. Plus even if he could do this and win.. wouldn't the visitation have to be on our visitation time? Then he'd be getting exactly what we are already offering... I don't know.

 

[Proserpina]

okay.. so he could for my step children, but not for our child together since my husband and I are together?

But I still don't see how he has anything that would ever hold up. We have never denied him of anything.. He was gone for a year trucking and was only home for limited times. And we have agreed to meet with him to see them the next time we have them. Plus even if he could do this and win.. wouldn't the visitation have to be on our visitation time? Then he'd be getting exactly what we are already offering... I don't know.

Honestly? If you're served with a suit, please come back and let us know - there are several posters with a fount of knowledge who would be happy to help you (and one in particular is from Indiana )

The biggest rule that comes to mind though is DO NOT agree to anything in mediation. You might feel pressured into agreeing, but stand firm, as a unit, and make him prove to the court that a suit not only has merit but also that the children would actually be negatively affected if GPV wasn't awarded.

 

[hmc8982]

Honestly? If you're served with a suit, please come back and let us know - there are several posters with a fount of knowledge who would be happy to help you (and one in particular is from Indiana )

The biggest rule that comes to mind though is DO NOT agree to anything in mediation. You might feel pressured into agreeing, but stand firm, as a unit, and make him prove to the court that a suit not only has merit but also that the children would actually be negatively affected if GPV wasn't awarded.

Thanks! Yes.. I really feel like he is bluffing and just annoyed because he hasn't been able to see them. But it has never been because we denied him. We can't help the job he chose took him away. I"m certain he has nothing that would hold up and there is no way in this world with his lifestyle that he could prove that he would be a benefit to their lives in that way. But it doesn't matter, because we aren't even trying to keep him from seeing them. He's just mad because we had plans today already and told him he would have to wait until the next time we have the boys if he wants to see them. There is just no reason to go to court over it.. everyone is safe, healthy and happy.. no abuse, neglect, drugs or anything.. and we allow him to see them! It just made us a bit paranoid when he mentioned it.