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Grandparents harrassing us for more frequent access

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Tracy Nestor

Junior Member
My husband's ex-wife died in February last year and his two children (Leah aged 14 and Daniel 9) now live with us (35 miles from their grandparents). We wanted them living with us straight away but we had a lot of resilience from the grandparents and it took 5 months to get them here and into new schools. (they actually threw Leah out anyway as they couldn’t cope with her and were unable to offer her the emotional support she needed).

Both children were with us by August and we moved into a new house so that we could start a brand new family life together. Initially, we had an amicable, flexible arrangement with the grandparents, whereby my husband would meet them halfway to drop off Leah and Dan every 6 to 8 weeks and they would stay with them from the Friday night to the Sunday morning. However, now all of a sudden the grandfather has threatened us with court action because he doesn’t feel the visitation times are enough. They’ve fallen out with Leah completely so she doesn’t want to go (the things they have said and done to that poor girl are shocking, not to mention throwing her out of their home not long after her mum died) but we have always maintained contact with Dan even though it was against our better wishes. He’s arguing and swearing down the phone that he wants more frequent weekends but we’ve explained that we can’t commit to that as we’re trying to build a life here – Dan has activities on Saturdays, plus we spend time together as a family, visit other family members etc. This resulted in the grandparent threatening to turn up on our doorstep and, ultimately, take us to court.

The family is extremely argumentative, aggressive and volatile (heavy drinkers/smokers/minimal intelligence) and it was with great reluctance that we maintained contact in the first place but now we’re tired and fed up of fighting with them – they always have issues of some sort or another. Since they’ve threatened us anyway, we’ve told them that we’re stopping all contact from now on as we’re sick of it all. Now they’re harassing us on a daily basis (they’ve even recruited their son to call us and send us texts) and I’m personally worried that they’re going to turn up and physically abuse either my husband or myself. Would they have a case in a UK court?

It’s completely their own fault that they’ve ruined what I think was a perfectly good arrangement.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
 


Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
My husband's ex-wife died in February last year and his two children (Leah aged 14 and Daniel 9) now live with us (35 miles from their grandparents). We wanted them living with us straight away but we had a lot of resilience from the grandparents and it took 5 months to get them here and into new schools. (they actually threw Leah out anyway as they couldn’t cope with her and were unable to offer her the emotional support she needed).

Both children were with us by August and we moved into a new house so that we could start a brand new family life together. Initially, we had an amicable, flexible arrangement with the grandparents, whereby my husband would meet them halfway to drop off Leah and Dan every 6 to 8 weeks and they would stay with them from the Friday night to the Sunday morning. However, now all of a sudden the grandfather has threatened us with court action because he doesn’t feel the visitation times are enough. They’ve fallen out with Leah completely so she doesn’t want to go (the things they have said and done to that poor girl are shocking, not to mention throwing her out of their home not long after her mum died) but we have always maintained contact with Dan even though it was against our better wishes. He’s arguing and swearing down the phone that he wants more frequent weekends but we’ve explained that we can’t commit to that as we’re trying to build a life here – Dan has activities on Saturdays, plus we spend time together as a family, visit other family members etc. This resulted in the grandparent threatening to turn up on our doorstep and, ultimately, take us to court.

The family is extremely argumentative, aggressive and volatile (heavy drinkers/smokers/minimal intelligence) and it was with great reluctance that we maintained contact in the first place but now we’re tired and fed up of fighting with them – they always have issues of some sort or another. Since they’ve threatened us anyway, we’ve told them that we’re stopping all contact from now on as we’re sick of it all. Now they’re harassing us on a daily basis (they’ve even recruited their son to call us and send us texts) and I’m personally worried that they’re going to turn up and physically abuse either my husband or myself. Would they have a case in a UK court?

It’s completely their own fault that they’ve ruined what I think was a perfectly good arrangement.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

US Law Only

This forum deals with US Law questions only - sorry.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
My husband's ex-wife died in February last year and his two children (Leah aged 14 and Daniel 9) now live with us (35 miles from their grandparents). We wanted them living with us straight away but we had a lot of resilience from the grandparents and it took 5 months to get them here and into new schools. (they actually threw Leah out anyway as they couldn’t cope with her and were unable to offer her the emotional support she needed).

Both children were with us by August and we moved into a new house so that we could start a brand new family life together. Initially, we had an amicable, flexible arrangement with the grandparents, whereby my husband would meet them halfway to drop off Leah and Dan every 6 to 8 weeks and they would stay with them from the Friday night to the Sunday morning. However, now all of a sudden the grandfather has threatened us with court action because he doesn’t feel the visitation times are enough. They’ve fallen out with Leah completely so she doesn’t want to go (the things they have said and done to that poor girl are shocking, not to mention throwing her out of their home not long after her mum died) but we have always maintained contact with Dan even though it was against our better wishes. He’s arguing and swearing down the phone that he wants more frequent weekends but we’ve explained that we can’t commit to that as we’re trying to build a life here – Dan has activities on Saturdays, plus we spend time together as a family, visit other family members etc. This resulted in the grandparent threatening to turn up on our doorstep and, ultimately, take us to court.

The family is extremely argumentative, aggressive and volatile (heavy drinkers/smokers/minimal intelligence) and it was with great reluctance that we maintained contact in the first place but now we’re tired and fed up of fighting with them – they always have issues of some sort or another. Since they’ve threatened us anyway, we’ve told them that we’re stopping all contact from now on as we’re sick of it all. Now they’re harassing us on a daily basis (they’ve even recruited their son to call us and send us texts) and I’m personally worried that they’re going to turn up and physically abuse either my husband or myself. Would they have a case in a UK court?

It’s completely their own fault that they’ve ruined what I think was a perfectly good arrangement.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Despite the fact that this forum is for US law only, I do know a little bit about gpv in the UK, so I can give a broad answer to the question.

They have "standing" to sue for access because their daughter is deceased. Standing however, does not guarantee a win.

Leah is old enough that her wishes will determine whether or not they receive access to her. Dan is young enough that his wishes will not have as much weight.

In addition, depending on the distance between the two homes, they might not receive as much access as your husband was giving them, if they did file suit and win.
 

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