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#1
10-09-2009, 12:01 PM
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 Help NemawWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA I have some questions about grandparents rights to visitation. My son has a 5 year old daughter and is no longer with her mother, I have taken care of this child since she was 6 weeks old when her mother went back to work, my son was not working at the time (he lived with me) and I was the one who bought all of her needs (Food, Clothing Diapers etc.) he lived with me for the first 3 years of his daughters life and since has married, and has another child, he has shared physical custody of my grandaughter. Now I dont get to see her but twice a month only when my son has her every other weekend, (she has started school). Her mother is trying to keep her from seeing me, She may only be 5 years old but she knows what she want and she wants to be with me. Idont want to take her from her parents, I just want to see her, her mother does not allow her to sleep over at my house and my grandaughter does not know why, she is traumatize by all this. What can I do? Thank you Nemaw. |
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#2
10-09-2009, 12:19 PM
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#3
10-09-2009, 12:26 PM
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__________________ Dang the Persephone for eating those pomegranate seeds. It is because of her urge to snack that we must suffer through the winter that will soon be upon us.  |
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#4
10-09-2009, 12:36 PM
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| With all due respect: The 5 year old is not traumatized by not spending the night at your house. You seem to be projecting your feelings on to the 5 year old.
__________________ * * The information I gave is based on my 7 seconds of research on Google. Review the information yourself to make an informed decision. Communication is KEY - 10 mins of talking now can save you months of headaches later! Masterfully stating the obvious to the oblivious! (Thanks SP!) Tell it like it is! When all else fails, make up a statistic!  Gender references shall apply equally to the other gender. I will not correct gender mistakes (unless I want to) |
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#5
10-09-2009, 12:36 PM
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| Your relationship as a grandparent does not supersede the parents' legal right to ultimate authority of their child. It's great that you helped to provide for this child while she was younger, but that doesn't buy you any special privileges. When parents aren't together, that's generally how it works. The child sees the people in Mom's life when she's with Mom, and she sees the people in Dad's life when she's with Dad. If her time with Dad is limited, that's going to limit your time with her as well. I can understand the child being sad that she doesn't see Nemaw as much as she used to, but traumatized? If that's true, the adults in her life--including you--need to help her focus on the positive (the time she does get to spend with you) and distract her from what she perceives as traumatic. You can help by avoiding any discussion in her presence about how this makes you feel. And I certainly hope she doesn't know you're investigating whether you have any legal recourse. |
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#6
10-09-2009, 03:05 PM
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As long as your son has visitation rights and you can see the child on his time, no court will ever give you any visitation rights of your own...period.
__________________ in vino veritas |
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#7
10-09-2009, 06:23 PM
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| You can make nice with mommy and maybe squeeze out a little extra time...but really, why is seeing her twice a month so unacceptable to you? It may not be what you WANT but it's not an unreasonable amount of time for a grandparent to spend with a grandchild. I may be wrong about this, but barring some sort of court order, I think if Dad wants to allow little one to spend the night with you on his time, he can. However, he may not want to sacrifice the little bit of time he has with her. As Charlotte said, YOU can make this easier on your grandchild by focusing less on "I know, it's SO sad you don't see Nemaw every day anymore, poor little thing." and more on "you're here now, so what fun things can we do? You choose!" If you love this little girl, put what YOU want aside and help her deal with what is. And "traumatized" is just a little overly dramatic, don't you think? Last edited by frylover; 10-09-2009 at 06:52 PM. |
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#8
10-10-2009, 02:16 PM
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she doesnt decideQuote:
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#9
10-10-2009, 02:20 PM
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#10
10-10-2009, 03:31 PM
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| Nemaw, you've been given the accurate legal advice - you have absolutely no standing to do anything in terms of forcing visitation or even getting court-ordered visitation. The fact that you see her twice a month is already above and beyond many grandparent visitation schedules; take the time that you have, put your feelings aside and help treasure and nurture this little girl. You're an important part of her life - don't ruin that by forcing her parents to choose between visiting you and not visiting you; if you do it's virtually guaranteed that you will end up never seeing your granddaughter.
__________________ ***************************** When you can't bear something but it goes on anyway, the person who survives isn't you anymore; you've changed and become someone else, a new person, the one who did bear it after all. — Austin Grossman Quote:
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#11
10-10-2009, 05:11 PM
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__________________ Please HELP me!!! I have three of THEM!!!!!!  |
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