My Boys

[gypsyflame626]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I am currently fighting for custody of my 2 teenage boys. I had custody of them up until a year ago, and then they went to live with their dad since they did not like their step-dad. There was never any abuse (proven by DCF), just more strict than they liked, and of course dad was not since he took them to his mom's whenever he could and they could do whatever at her house. Now dad sits in jail awaiting trial on mollestation charges of his 2 stepdaughters, and the grandmother is fighting me for custody. For now the Judge has granted it based on the childrens age and "maturity" level. I need help. My 15 yr old son has a high functioning form of Autism, and where he was on track, maturing as normal as possible, he has now reverted to around a 12 yr old level, and is easily manipulated to do whatever his 13yr old brother wants, and of course the brother being a normal 13yr old, wants to be where the rules suit him, NOT his best interest. Any advise would be greatly appreciated.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by gypsyflame626

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I am currently fighting for custody of my 2 teenage boys. I had custody of them up until a year ago, and then they went to live with their dad since they did not like their step-dad. There was never any abuse (proven by DCF), just more strict than they liked, and of course dad was not since he took them to his mom's whenever he could and they could do whatever at her house. Now dad sits in jail awaiting trial on mollestation charges of his 2 stepdaughters, and the grandmother is fighting me for custody. For now the Judge has granted it based on the childrens age and "maturity" level. I need help. My 15 yr old son has a high functioning form of Autism, and where he was on track, maturing as normal as possible, he has now reverted to around a 12 yr old level, and is easily manipulated to do whatever his 13yr old brother wants, and of course the brother being a normal 13yr old, wants to be where the rules suit him, NOT his best interest. Any advise would be greatly appreciated.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

If you don't have an attorney you need to get one. No way a judge should have granted even temporary custody to grandma without finding you legally unfit.

[Gracie3787]

I agree with LdiJ, you REALLY need to speak to an attorney ASAP.

[gypsyflame626]

I thank you for your advise, the problem is I know that I am not able to afford an attorney, is there a statute that I can include in my arguments to the judge? I am in the process of writing him a letter to include with my re-filing of the petition.

[TheGeekess]

Originally Posted by gypsyflame626

I thank you for your advise, the problem is I know that I am not able to afford an attorney, is there a statute that I can include in my arguments to the judge? I am in the process of writing him a letter to include with my re-filing of the petition.

You're wasting your time writing a letter to the judge.

[gypsyflame626]

You are probably right, however, I am writing one just the same, and could use some help. At least if I write it, I feel a little better knowing that I tried. When we had our last court date, he was not even there in person, just over the phone (something about double scheduling) and the dad and grandmother were always interupting me. You gotta love small town pollitics!!!

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by gypsyflame626

You are probably right, however, I am writing one just the same, and could use some help. At least if I write it, I feel a little better knowing that I tried. When we had our last court date, he was not even there in person, just over the phone (something about double scheduling) and the dad and grandmother were always interupting me. You gotta love small town pollitics!!!

The problem is that a judge will not even see or read your letter. You can provide the judge the same information, but it has to be part of your petition.

[Ohiogal]

Originally Posted by gypsyflame626

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I am currently fighting for custody of my 2 teenage boys. I had custody of them up until a year ago, and then they went to live with their dad since they did not like their step-dad. There was never any abuse (proven by DCF), just more strict than they liked, and of course dad was not since he took them to his mom's whenever he could and they could do whatever at her house. Now dad sits in jail awaiting trial on mollestation charges of his 2 stepdaughters, and the grandmother is fighting me for custody. For now the Judge has granted it based on the childrens age and "maturity" level. I need help. My 15 yr old son has a high functioning form of Autism, and where he was on track, maturing as normal as possible, he has now reverted to around a 12 yr old level, and is easily manipulated to do whatever his 13yr old brother wants, and of course the brother being a normal 13yr old, wants to be where the rules suit him, NOT his best interest. Any advise would be greatly appreciated.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Are these two of the four children you have in your house or would these two be in addition to the four? DCF doesn't have to prove DCF in order for it to exist or for dad's house to be a better place. What proof do you have as to the 15 year olds' emotional age? Your 32 year old husband may be a liability since he can't parent his own 17 year old.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by Ohiogal

Are these two of the four children you have in your house or would these two be in addition to the four? DCF doesn't have to prove DCF in order for it to exist or for dad's house to be a better place. What proof do you have as to the 15 year olds' emotional age? Your 32 year old husband may be a liability since he can't parent his own 17 year old.

The dad of these two children is in jail on charges of molesting his stepdaughters.

Now dad sits in jail awaiting trial on mollestation charges of his 2 stepdaughters, and the grandmother is fighting me for custody

This is a third party case.

[Ohiogal]

Then grandmother's house. Mom has to be proven unsuitable. It is possible that can happen. I have seen it happen. Dad is unsuitable due to his location and charges. Her 32 husband who doesn't care enough about his pregnant teenager daughter COULD be a liability. And again, are these children in addition to the four living in her home or included in the four?

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by Ohiogal

Then grandmother's house. Mom has to be proven unsuitable. It is possible that can happen. I have seen it happen. Dad is unsuitable due to his location and charges. Her 32 husband who doesn't care enough about his pregnant teenager daughter COULD be a liability. And again, are these children in addition to the four living in her home or included in the four?

In a third party case mom has to be proven unfit rather than unsuitable. Parents have the constitutional right to the care and custody of their children.

[gypsyflame626]

To Ohiogal: "Her 32 husband who doesn't care enough about his pregnant teenager daughter COULD be a liability." You have no idea about how my husband feels about his daughter, who is 18 now by the way, and we are still reaching out to her trying, trying to see her and help her get ready for the baby. Besides that, what LdiJ says is correct, this case has nothing to do with his custody case with his daughter. As far as me knowing my son's disability and what "Proof" do I have of his level, just everyone that knows and has known him his whole life.

To LdiJ: Thank you for your help, I will use my letter in my petition, just re-word it to fit the parameters of the petition. What you said about parents having the constitutional right to the care and custody of their children, that is what I need. Could you point me in the right direction please?!?

[Blue Meanie]

Originally Posted by gypsyflame626

To Ohiogal: "Her 32 husband who doesn't care enough about his pregnant teenager daughter COULD be a liability." You have no idea about how my husband feels about his daughter, who is 18 now by the way, and we are still reaching out to her trying, trying to see her and help her get ready for the baby. Besides that, what LdiJ says is correct, this case has nothing to do with his custody case with his daughter. As far as me knowing my son's disability and what "Proof" do I have of his level, just everyone that knows and has known him his whole life.

To LdiJ: Thank you for your help, I will use my letter in my petition, just re-word it to fit the parameters of the petition. What you said about parents having the constitutional right to the care and custody of their children, that is what I need. Could you point me in the right direction please?!?

Interesting. Ldij is an accountant and OgioGal is a Family Law Attorney/Guardian Ad Litum. But you think LDIJ is correct. What an idiot you are.

[Ohiogal]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

In a third party case mom has to be proven unfit rather than unsuitable. Parents have the constitutional right to the care and custody of their children.

Are you sure that is the case in Poster's state? Because that is NOT the case in every state. Because you are wrong about parents having to be UNFIT to lose custody.

ETA: And just because I KNOW you are going to argue with me, in some states it is unsuitable as case law shows per 2009-Ohio-3809
N.V. v. W.S.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2009-Ohio-3809
N.V., Appellant,
v.
W.S., et al., Appellees.

Court of Appeals No. S-08-032, Trial Court No. 63545

Court of Appeals of Ohio, Sixth District, Sandusky County.

July 31, 2009

:

In a custody proceeding between a parent and a nonparent, the court may not award custody to the nonparent without first determining that the parent is unsuitable to raise the child. In re Perales (1977), 52 Ohio St.2d 89, syllabus. The court must determine, by a preponderance of the evidence, that the parent abandoned the child, contractually relinquished custody of the child, that the parent has become totally incapable of supporting or caring for the child, or that an award of custody to the parent would be detrimental to the child. Id.

I will look for Florida.

[Ohiogal]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

If you don't have an attorney you need to get one. No way a judge should have granted even temporary custody to grandma without finding you legally unfit.

Per Florida case law you are WRONG:
766 So.2d 1036
Richardson v. Richardson, 766 So.2d 1036, 766 So.2d 1036 (Fla. 08/17/2000)
766 So.2d 1036, 766 So.2d 1036, 2000.FL.0047426

This case involves a dispute between a natural parent and a paternal grandparent over the custody of a minor child.

and

under the provisions of section 61.13(7) which authorizes custody for grandparents if a child is "actually residing with a grandparent in a stable relationship,"

And guess what? Oh yeah.... now shall we continue the lesson:

In any case where the child is actually residing with a grandparent in a stable relationship, whether the court has awarded custody to the grandparent or not, the court may recognize the grandparents as having the same standing as parents for evaluating what custody arrangements are in the best interest of the child. See § 61.13(7), Fla. Stat. (1997).

Note that Troxel was settled in 1998 and this case was decided when -- oh yeah, 2000.

When the custody dispute is between a natural parent and a third party, however, the test must include consideration of the right of a natural parent "to enjoy the custody, fellowship and companionship of his offspring . . . . This is a rule older than the common law itself." State ex rel. Sparks v. Reeves, 97 So.2d 18, 20 (Fla. 1957). In Reeves we held that in such a circumstnace [sic], custody should be denied to the natural parent only when such an award will, in fact, be detrimental to the welfare of the child. We explained what would constitute detriment to the child and approved a temporary grant of custody to the grandparents because of the father's temporary inability to care for the children after the mother's death. We cautioned, however, that the father would be entitled to custody once his ability to care for the children was established. Id. at 20-21. 460 So.2d 368, 369-70 (Fla. 1984).

Guess what -- that is NOT unfit. It is unsuitable. Florida. Hence why Grandma has temporary custody. Unfit is an option the courts have. NOTE THE OR.

Under this construction of the statute, even though a court determines that the grandparent has standing under section 61.13(7) to seek custody, the court may still not intervene in a parent-child relationship or determine whether custody with a grandparent is in the best interest of the child, unless it has been established that the parent abandoned the child, that the parent is unfit or that harm would result to the child if the parent were to be awarded custody. See S.G., 726 So.2d at 811 (relying on In re Guardianship of D.A. McW., 460 So.2d at 369-70);

Unfit OR that harm would result to the child. TWO different standards. Three when you count abandonment.

And what the court concluded:

In closing we note that in all custody cases, trial courts have broad continuing jurisdiction to ensure the protection of children within the court's jurisdiction and over matters related to the well-being of a child. Cf. Cone v. Cone, 62 So.2d 907 (Fla. 1953). *fn9 Further, if circumstances present themselves that question the safety of the minor child, any concerned party may seek the initiation of proceedings to protect the well-being of the child. See Schilling v. Wood, 532 So.2d 12 (Fla. 4th DCA 1988) (recognizing third party's right to initiate dependency proceedings under chapter 39). In addition, and, most importantly, trial courts should not hesitate to invoke the protective provisions of chapter 39 or otherwise act where a need for the immediate protection of a child becomes apparent

So actually the judge did nothing wrong per case law for Florida. Note that he gave TEMPORARY custody to grandma. And if mom is proven unsuitable grandma CAN prevail. UNsuitable is equivalent to determental to the child.