possible mental and emotional abuse to minor

[keegan88]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Nebraska. I need to know if the following is considered abuse and the steps I can take as a grandparent. My 8 yr old grand-daughter was told bu her step father that if she would not do as he asked he would put his python in bed with her some night. This has led to nightmares or not sleeping and other behaviors. She has a biological father with quite an extensive criminal background that has not seen her since she was 3 mons old, I do not want her going to him if she is taken out of home. What can I do I feel he should be turned in. She is adhd he does not see that she gets her meds if her mother is not home he does not help her or make sure homework is done, shower taken etc and mother will do nothing. Please tell me my rights and what can I do.

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Nebraska. I need to know if the following is considered abuse and the steps I can take as a grandparent. My 8 yr old grand-daughter was told bu her step father that if she would not do as he asked he would put his python in bed with her some night. This has led to nightmares or not sleeping and other behaviors. She has a biological father with quite an extensive criminal background that has not seen her since she was 3 mons old, I do not want her going to him if she is taken out of home. What can I do I feel he should be turned in. She is adhd he does not see that she gets her meds if her mother is not home he does not help her or make sure homework is done, shower taken etc and mother will do nothing. Please tell me my rights and what can I do.

You have no rights. If you believe the child is being neglected and/or abused, you need to call CPS or the equivalent in your state and let them investigate.

If they remove the child, you can inform CPS that you're willing to take the child.

 

[mistoffolees]

You have no rights. If you believe the child is being neglected and/or abused, you need to call CPS or the equivalent in your state and let them investigate.

If they remove the child, you can inform CPS that you're willing to take the child.

My own inclination is that threatening to put a python in bed with her probably rises to the level of abuse, but it would be a difficult call. If the child saw the snake killing and eating an animal, it would be more plausible to argue that it's abuse. The problem would be proving that he said that.

If it were me, I'd probably give CPS a call to see what their opinion on the matter is. Of course, you run the risk of not being allowed to see the child if the parent doesn't like it.

ETA:
Not giving ADHD medicine is probably not going to be an issue. Those medicines are controversial enough that a lot of judges don't penalize someone for not giving them.

 

[Isis1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Nebraska. I need to know if the following is considered abuse and the steps I can take as a grandparent. My 8 yr old grand-daughter was told bu her step father that if she would not do as he asked he would put his python in bed with her some night. This has led to nightmares or not sleeping and other behaviors. She has a biological father with quite an extensive criminal background that has not seen her since she was 3 mons old, I do not want her going to him if she is taken out of home. What can I do I feel he should be turned in. She is adhd he does not see that she gets her meds if her mother is not home he does not help her or make sure homework is done, shower taken etc and mother will do nothing. Please tell me my rights and what can I do.

you do not have any rights to the child. if you REALLY feel the child is endangered, then you can call a child abuse hotline.

and btw...tell the child stepdad is going to put a snake in the bed...is not abuse. i constantly tell my kids i'm going to cut them at the knees if they dare grow too tall.

as a mother, I make sure my kid's homework is done. not my husband. i make sure medication is taken. not my husband. you want to blame the stepfather. how about you blame mom where the responsibility lies?

 

[Proserpina]

Yes, where IS Mom?

 

[davew128]

My mother used to me I'd get kidney stones if I walked around barefoot on the floor. I believed it hook line and sinker for years.

I see no problem with using the threat of a python (real or otherwise) to motivate a child.

 

[SESmama]

And what was the context of the conversation? I threaten my own an with duck tape when I get notes home from being a social butterfly. He knows I am kidding that I wouldn't really duck tape his mouth but he also knows I am serious that I will find consequences to befit the misbehavior at school. However, the first time my step-sons heard me say it they told their mom they were scared of me. So, what is the context that the remark was made in? If you weren't there then how do you know?

 

[mistoffolees]

And what was the context of the conversation? I threaten my own an with duck tape when I get notes home from being a social butterfly. He knows I am kidding that I wouldn't really duck tape his mouth but he also knows I am serious that I will find consequences to befit the misbehavior at school. However, the first time my step-sons heard me say it they told their mom they were scared of me. So, what is the context that the remark was made in? If you weren't there then how do you know?

Yes, the context is important. Saying you're going to cut a kid off at the knees if he keeps growing is obviously a joke.

In this case, the child is having nightmares and not sleeping, so it was not clearly a joke - at least not in the child's mind. Of course, there's STILL the problem of proving that Dad said that and that he wasn't joking.

 

[Hot Topic]

My mother used to me I'd get kidney stones if I walked around barefoot on the floor. I believed it hook line and sinker for years.

I see no problem with using the threat of a python (real or otherwise) to motivate a child.

Dave, I doubt you even knew what a kidney stone was, let alone that your mother used to "scare" you with it.

 

[tranquility]

My parents took me to a place on the weekends and once a week where they told me I would burn with fire and brimstone forever if I disrespected my parents or ate a meat other than fish on Friday. (Well, maybe not the fish part. That would probably only get a century or two in purgatory.)

 

[Antigone*]

Heck my parents told me frogs would come out of my mouth if I lied. I think this is just an overstepping grandparent making things seem bigger than they really are.

...and Dave put some socks on, your mom was right.