to runaway or not to

[helpless76]

please help me decide something! im from florida and i just cant take my life. ive been suicidal since i was 8 years old. your supposed to be happy in your childhood but i never was. i was sexually abused by my father when i was 2 years old (hes gone now) my mom is dieing of cancer and my grandma takes care of her and me but she an alcholic and a perfectionist who is driving me crazy. they sent me away to a program for cutting myself and being suicidal. also for doing some drugs and skipping school. but ive been there for 1 year and 3 months now. im on the highest level and everyone thinks i should be able to go home now but my grandma wont let me she can never trust me again and i cant leave till im 18 and im 16 right now. i cant stand being in a program but i also cant stand being at home. my life feels like a living hell just like its always felt like. ive been wanting to run away since i was 4. even before my mom was dieing she was so out of it because of all the drugs she use to take. ive always been more like her mother than the other way around. ive decided i think it would be best if i ran away. i have a place i can stay at and it would also be good for my family cause my grandma wouldnt have to spend so much money on that program and she would be able to afford more of my moms medications. i was wondering if i came back when im 18 would they be able to do anything to me or would i be free? please help me i really need advice!!! also i have a good plan for when i run away. when im 18 ill get my ged than go to one year of college and ill become a computer specialist. by the way when i run away it wont be from the program it will be from home cause im on a home visit.

 

[Zephyr]

you should not run away, you might want to contact your local child services agency to find out what the requirements for getting placed in a foster home would be

 

[BL]

please help me decide something! im from florida and i just cant take my life. ive been suicidal since i was 8 years old. your supposed to be happy in your childhood but i never was. i was sexually abused by my father when i was 2 years old (hes gone now) my mom is dieing of cancer and my grandma takes care of her and me but she an alcholic and a perfectionist who is driving me crazy. they sent me away to a program for cutting myself and being suicidal. also for doing some drugs and skipping school. but ive been there for 1 year and 3 months now. im on the highest level and everyone thinks i should be able to go home now but my grandma wont let me she can never trust me again and i cant leave till im 18 and im 16 right now. i cant stand being in a program but i also cant stand being at home. my life feels like a living hell just like its always felt like. ive been wanting to run away since i was 4. even before my mom was dieing she was so out of it because of all the drugs she use to take. ive always been more like her mother than the other way around. ive decided i think it would be best if i ran away. i have a place i can stay at and it would also be good for my family cause my grandma wouldnt have to spend so much money on that program and she would be able to afford more of my moms medications. i was wondering if i came back when im 18 would they be able to do anything to me or would i be free? please help me i really need advice!!! also i have a good plan for when i run away. when im 18 ill get my ged than go to one year of college and ill become a computer specialist. by the way when i run away it wont be from the program it will be from home cause im on a home visit.

Well If you do and they catch you , you will be locked up , and privileges taken away .

You should be speaking with your councilors about your problems and thoughts .

If a councilor doesn't seem to help , request a different one . Sooner or later you'll run across one that Fits you .

You would be foolish to keep acting out the way you have done in the past .

You need to face reality . You can do nothing for anyone else , if you can't take care of yourself Mentally .

A part of your post makes no sense , You can't stand home environment but you want to run away , get your GED , then return to the same environment you can't stand .

Focus on yourself and your future . Instead of putting all your energy into negatives , start using that energy to become a stable citizen .

 

[ksmygrits]

You might have a good plan but you still have 2 years before you are 18 and a lot can happen to you. Is there any other family that you might be able to stay with or family friends? You need to talk with your grandmother and ask her to give you a trial stay at home. Running away is only going to cause you more problems and youwill be in more trouble if you get caught. I ran away to FL once. Luckily, I did get caught and sent back. The things that happened could have been worse but I was lucky. Try to find some help and do not stop until you get someone to listen to you and help you.

 

[helpless76]

i dont want to return to the same place when im 18. but i want to visit my family. i dont want to live there. and theres no family i can stay with. you guys just dont understand. but if when im 18 i go back to visit them can they do anything to me?

 

[BL]

i dont want to return to the same place when im 18. but i want to visit my family. i dont want to live there. and theres no family i can stay with. you guys just dont understand. but if when im 18 i go back to visit them can they do anything to me?

No , You don't understand .

What happened to you as a Young child , you have to deal with in a constructive way .

Your grandmother obviously has problems of her own , and because of YOUR history doesn't want you back there to live , plus YOU can't stand it .

Start knocking down that brick wall you can't stand .

Attend some church services where there is music . Ask god to help you along the Path of Life . Listen to the birds , watch the squirrels , feed them , take in some nature . Nature has nothing against you , become apart of it .

Make a string with about 20 little knots , about 1/2 an inch apart . Each night just before you go to sleep , say these words for each knot you slowly pull through your fingers .

" Each day , my life is getting better and Better " .

Quit saying you guys don't understand . Where do you think most of us got our Knowledge from ? We lived it . Life ain't always a bed of roses .

 

[ihateallthings]

runaway

if its that bad go ahead and do it. i live in maryland and i dont even know what the law is here and im seriously planning to runaway.

 

[BL]

if its that bad go ahead and do it. i live in maryland and i dont even know what the law is here and im seriously planning to runaway.

Your screen name says it all , why would anyone listen to your advice ?

 

[nohr4u1yr]

Not the answer

Running away from current problems does not solve them but only pile new ones on top.

Everywhere you go will have rules, everywhere you go will have consequences, everywhere you go people will upset you, everywhere you go people won't understand you, everywhere you go...it will happen...

I don't know if your 1st post was spruced up to make it sound more horrible than it is...but, step back...relax...there is ALWAYS a way to make things better...you stated that you want to return to visit your family when you are 18.

I'm flipping this around now...how do you think they are going to feel if you runaway and they have no idea where you are? You are STILL thinking about your family...Take the help you are given and realize they are trying to help. As someone else stated - if you do not click with your current counselor request another!

 

[ihateallthings]

just because my name is i hate all things it dosnt matter... i got this way cause of my ******* father rasing me and my mother trying to raise me so back off!!!!

 

[BL]

just because my name is i hate all things it dosnt matter... i got this way cause of my ******* father rasing me and my mother trying to raise me so back off!!!!

I supose ya didn't go to school either . Poor kid , so your Parents raised you . Waaaaaaa .......... Waaaaaaa ..... Get a life ... I use to play in mud puddles instead of swimming pools. Waaaaaaa ......

 

[ihateallthings]

I supose ya didn't go to school either . Poor kid , so your Parents raised you . Waaaaaaa .......... Waaaaaaa ..... Get a life ... I use to play in mud puddles instead of swimming pools. Waaaaaaa ......

thats your own stupidty and yes i go to school u dumb ass im only 16 and im not crying cause my parents are rasing me im not crying at all im saying that they are drugys and acholics and that i do relate so you know what u need to get a damn life and stop sitting on here saying stupid **** like if u run away it isnt going to solve your prombles no one wants to see that let alone hear it.

 

[Curt581]

Sounds like a plan... go ahead, run away. It won't be as if you're the only one. There are thousands of teenage runaways out there, just like you.

Once you're gone, you can always turn to prostitution and drug use. There's a pimp out there right now waiting for you, ready willing and able to beat the living crap out of you every day, have his buddies gang-rape you, get you hooked on crack, and take eveything you have... including any self esteem you might have left.

I guess that's how you want to end up.