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  1. #1
    wxm146 is offline Junior Member
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    Seek advice on lawyers in NJ

    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NJ

    My mother in law hates me and filed a FALSE child abuse report with the police and child service. Both police and child service agents came, investigated us and found us good parents.

    Needless to say, my husband and I asked her not to visit our kids any more.

    A few weeks later, we received a motion from court saying my mother in law filed a case in the family court for grandparent visitation rights.

    We have very young kids, toddler and babies. Given the history of her behavior, we don't want her to see our kids.

    My husband is losing his job soon, so money is an issue to hire a lawyer. I did a lot of research online and have a list of NJ cases where grandparents are denied visitation rights in past ten years. I think our case is straightforward. I don't think she will hire a lawyer, so I think we can argue for ourselves in court, but my husband doesn't want to risk it and wants to hire a lawyer.

    Please give your opinion if we can win the case without a lawyer. If we have to hire a lawyer, needless to say, we want a reasonably priced one having experience with grandparent visitation rights. Can you please recommend one? Thanks.
  2. #2
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wxm146 View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NJ

    My mother in law hates me and filed a FALSE child abuse report with the police and child service. Both police and child service agents came, investigated us and found us good parents.

    Needless to say, my husband and I asked her not to visit our kids any more.

    A few weeks later, we received a motion from court saying my mother in law filed a case in the family court for grandparent visitation rights.

    We have very young kids, toddler and babies. Given the history of her behavior, we don't want her to see our kids.

    My husband is losing his job soon, so money is an issue to hire a lawyer. I did a lot of research online and have a list of NJ cases where grandparents are denied visitation rights in past ten years. I think our case is straightforward. I don't think she will hire a lawyer, so I think we can argue for ourselves in court, but my husband doesn't want to risk it and wants to hire a lawyer.

    Please give your opinion if we can win the case without a lawyer. If we have to hire a lawyer, needless to say, we want a reasonably priced one having experience with grandparent visitation rights. Can you please recommend one? Thanks.

    We cannot recommend attorneys, but you can use the "find an attorney" button yourself.

    Honestly? If it were me actually being served with a suit, I'd do whatever it took to get an attorney.

    While I do agree that you seem to have a pretty straightforward case, I wouldn't take the risk. I'd sell the truck, whatever, if it meant I could guarantee my constitutional rights to decide who can be around my children.

    Too many respected posters here have been screwed, even WITH an attorney, and I'd hate to see it happen again.
  3. #3
    TheGeekess is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Proserpina View Post
    We cannot recommend attorneys, but you can use the "find an attorney" button yourself.

    Honestly? If it were me actually being served with a suit, I'd do whatever it took to get an attorney.

    While I do agree that you seem to have a pretty straightforward case, I wouldn't take the risk. I'd sell the truck, whatever, if it meant I could guarantee my constitutional rights to decide who can be around my children.

    Too many respected posters here have been screwed, even WITH an attorney, and I'd hate to see it happen again.
    It's way harder (almost nigh impossible) for a grandparent to get visitation with the children of an intact family than one that is not.

    If it gets to mediation, don't agree to Granny getting any kind of visitation. Make the judge decide.
  4. #4
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheGeekess View Post
    It's way harder (almost nigh impossible) for a grandparent to get visitation with the children of an intact family than one that is not.

    If it gets to mediation, don't agree to Granny getting any kind of visitation. Make the judge decide.


    Absoflippetyfloppetylutely!
  5. #5
    catlvr976 is offline Junior Member
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    I just wanted to chime in here and say please do whatever you can to get an attorney.

    I live in Pa and have an ongoing battle with my former MIL (who blames me for my late husband's suicide) and even with an attorney, these courts still think it's best that my poor kids have some kind of contact with her. I just had ANOTHER hearing with her earlier this week and am waiting to hear what the decision is. Even though she told the hearing officer what she ISN'T going to do (travel here to visit her grandchildren who she supposedly loves and misses so much), and not showing up for her visits, not calling on their birthdays, or holidays, etc... I'm pretty certain that they will STILL give her something. It's totally messed up. That's even WITH an attorney. Thankfully she came without one this week. But anyway....

    That's all I'm going to say before I start on my rant about this.

    Please do whatever you can. I'm in debt to my attorney almost 10,000. That makes me sick to write. In debt even though she doesn't use what the courts granted her, and then decides to take me back to court whenever she gets a bug up her rear end. But my children deserve to be protected from someone like her....and I can't count on the courts to have my back on that.
  6. #6
    TheGeekess is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by catlvr976 View Post
    I just wanted to chime in here and say please do whatever you can to get an attorney.

    I live in Pa and have an ongoing battle with my former MIL (who blames me for my late husband's suicide) and even with an attorney, these courts still think it's best that my poor kids have some kind of contact with her. I just had ANOTHER hearing with her earlier this week and am waiting to hear what the decision is. Even though she told the hearing officer what she ISN'T going to do (travel here to visit her grandchildren who she supposedly loves and misses so much), and not showing up for her visits, not calling on their birthdays, or holidays, etc... I'm pretty certain that they will STILL give her something. It's totally messed up. That's even WITH an attorney. Thankfully she came without one this week. But anyway....

    That's all I'm going to say before I start on my rant about this.

    Please do whatever you can. I'm in debt to my attorney almost 10,000. That makes me sick to write. In debt even though she doesn't use what the courts granted her, and then decides to take me back to court whenever she gets a bug up her rear end. But my children deserve to be protected from someone like her....and I can't count on the courts to have my back on that.
    OP's family is intact: both parents living and married to each other. She won't have near the trouble with Granny that you're having. Plus, you are in PA (which has a reputation for GPV) and OP is in NJ. Lots of difference there.
  7. #7
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheGeekess View Post
    OP's family is intact: both parents living and married to each other. She won't have near the trouble with Granny that you're having. Plus, you are in PA (which has a reputation for GPV) and OP is in NJ. Lots of difference there.
    I agree. NJ has quite a bit of case law that is favorable to parents.
  8. #8
    catlvr976 is offline Junior Member
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    Oh, yes, from what I've read, you guys are totally correct. It just seems like it might be better to err on the side of caution. I just feel like one can never be too cautious. I guess my experience has tainted my view of the courts, have to side with poor "grandma," cause any "grandma" (or grandpa) is better than none and what does a parent know!!

    Sorry. Major sore spot.

    OP: what is it with these "grandparents?" They must all operate from the same handbook or something. Mine filed a false report on me a couple years ago, too.
    Last edited by catlvr976; 03-09-2012 at 08:35 AM.
  9. #9
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    Again - your experience in PA is moot in NJ.
  10. #10
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by stealth2 View Post
    Again - your experience in PA is moot in NJ.
    Seriously...PA and NY are the two worst state in the US when it comes to parental rights and grandparent issues. In some states grandparent's ability to obtain visitation are virtually nil, in many other states grandparent's rights are virtually dead, and in many others grandparents can only get visitation rights in the most narrowest of circumstances.

    Its unfortunate for you that you live in one of the two states where grandparents still have a bit of an upper hand in the gpv battle, but its not valid for you to equate your situation with parents who don't live in one of those two states.
  11. #11
    catlvr976 is offline Junior Member
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    I apologize for adding my story.

    I only felt the need to reply when I read what Proserpina wrote about:

    Honestly? If it were me actually being served with a suit, I'd do whatever it took to get an attorney.

    While I do agree that you seem to have a pretty straightforward case, I wouldn't take the risk. I'd sell the truck, whatever, if it meant I could guarantee my constitutional rights to decide who can be around my children.

    Too many respected posters here have been screwed, even WITH an attorney, and I'd hate to see it happen again.
    Even though I may only post here very, very occasionally and for advice in my case; I'm sure I'm not respected in the sense that I'm not an attorney, I just felt that this statement in particular was very important.

    I apologize for adding info that is irrelevant. I just thought I was helping by backing up Proserpina's post.

    With that said, I completely agree with this statement no matter where you live:

    as parents, we need to attempt to "guarantee our constitutional rights to decide who can be around our children."

    Again, I apologize and will now bow out of the conversation. OP, good luck to you! I tend to go off on a tangent on the subject of gpv.

    I'm truly sorry for butting in.
  12. #12
    TinkerBelleLuvr is offline Senior Member
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    In addition to filing a motion for rebuttal, you should ask the courts for the grandparent to reimburse your legal fees.
  13. #13
    startedone is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wxm146 View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NJ

    My mother in law hates me and filed a FALSE child abuse report with the police and child service. Both police and child service agents came, investigated us and found us good parents.
    .
    That's beyond hate honey. That's psycho !
  14. #14
    Hot Topic is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by TinkerBelleLuvr View Post
    In addition to filing a motion for rebuttal, you should ask the courts for the grandparent to reimburse your legal fees.


    Oh come on.
  15. #15
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hot Topic View Post
    Oh come on.
    I absolutely agree with Tinker. If grandma wasn't being so toxic she wouldn't need to file for gpv.

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