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Au pair problem

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Clean Sanchez

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Virginia

We have an aupair from Brazil on a J1 visa. She had one month left on her one-year program with us when she requested to rematch to another family. Her reasons were because we found out she was trying to rematch with another family right down the road from us who had tried to sneak their aupair back into the US on a B1 visa after her J1 expired.

Originally she said she wanted to go outside Virginia to see other states, but we found out she really wants to go to this family because she will have her own car, very easy working hours, and that we "cramp her active social life."

Problem is she was going to take a 3-week vacation prior to joining the other family...the au pair agency found out and was NOT happy as there can be no gaps in service if she changes families.

She has been trying to find ways to stay in the US illegally: tons of US Citizen male friends and she has been talking to money- and credit-lending businesses. But most important is that her childcare skills have gone down the tubes: our kids are scared of her and she has made our son's medical condition worse through stress.

We would like to send her back to Brazil, but she has the DS-2019 extension and can stay a year. If she goes to another family, we feel that family should be informed about these shortcomings, but the au pair agency doesn't want to pass on our info and feels she has the right to go to whatever family she chooses.

I have the contact info for State and the consulate where she got her visa. I have a security clearance and don't want to get dinged a few years from now because she was a visa overstay either. If we can't get her sent back, how do we make sure the new family is aware of our problems with her? Children could be injured because of her (and I can't go into detail about all that here...:mad:)
 


seniorjudge

Senior Member
I think you need to have a serious talk with the immigration folks.

And afterwards send them a memo in writing about the stuff y'all talked about.
 

xylene

Senior Member
"Au Pair Blues"

Got me cheap dame
From another strange country
South of the US of A

Thought it would be easy
My wife would just loaf.
I'd have no worries.

But I got the Au Pair Blues
I'll Let the foreigner raise my kids
I was bliind to think
I'd sure be OK.

I gave her the car keys
to take the kids to the store
How could I know that
"The Store" was a rave in Baltimore....

But I got the Au Pair Blues...
I'll import the cheap labor.
But insist she can't stay.

Why didn't somebody tell me why
people hate rich people like me.

Now she's tossin me over,
For for someone elses bait.
I'm gettin in trouble,
With the Department of State.

Oh baby I got them Au Pair Blues.

You people from the Hamptons know-what-I'm-talking-bout...

Them foreign dame,
Dirty shame
My sneaky neighbors lame
Au pair blues.

Yeah.
 

fairisfair

Senior Member
How Ironic that none of these shortcomings were recognized by your family, UNTIL she kicked you to the curb.

Congratulations, you are the reason that people in many countries call us ugly americans.

What you are proposing to do, is truly ugly, and you are a very vindictive and ugly person.

I wouldn't work for you either.
 

Clean Sanchez

Junior Member
How Ironic that none of these shortcomings were recognized by your family, UNTIL she kicked you to the curb.
We didn't find out some of this stuff until we took her cell phone (that we pay for) away, and found all these calls to money and credit lenders, and text messages from guys who say they hope she finds a way to stay in the US so they can "get together and party" sometime. As far as her other problems, we were very patient and used constructive criticism, and in retrospect we were probably too patient with her.

Oh, and we took her cell phone away because our bill shot up because of her constant text messaging when she's supposed to be watching our kids.
 

evcalyptos

Senior Member
our kids are scared of her and she has made our son's medical condition worse through stress.

We would like to send her back to Brazil, but she has the DS-2019 extension and can stay a year. If she goes to another family, we feel that family should be informed about these shortcomings, but the au pair agency doesn't want to pass on our info and feels she has the right to go to whatever family she chooses.

I have the contact info for State and the consulate where she got her visa. I have a security clearance and don't want to get dinged a few years from now because she was a visa overstay either. If we can't get her sent back, how do we make sure the new family is aware of our problems with her? Children could be injured because of her (and I can't go into detail about all that here...:mad:)
Document, document, document. Surely there is a provision in your contract to fire her: do so--read the first sentence I left quoted! If your kids are scared, get her out of your home.

It's the same advice as for a spousal case gone bad--her immigration problems are HERS. If you terminate her within the constraints of your contract, what she chooses to do cloud HER future, not yours.

She's been admitted.. it is up to her to maintain her status (or not). Follow the letter of your agreement with the agency, and let her concern herself with her immigration status.

My .02
 
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msiron

Member
We didn't find out some of this stuff until we took her cell phone (that we pay for) away, and found all these calls to money and credit lenders, and text messages from guys who say they hope she finds a way to stay in the US so they can "get together and party" sometime. As far as her other problems, we were very patient and used constructive criticism, and in retrospect we were probably too patient with her.
and what is wrong with her attempting to get a loan to say here? The girl is young and should make friends and have sometime to go out and enjoy her new friends and our culture. 'Get together and party' is a euphemism even middle age adults use. It doesn't necessarily mean sex, drugs and rock & roll!

Oh, and we took her cell phone away because our bill shot up because of her constant text messaging when she's supposed to be watching our kids.
Lame, your just looking for a reason to deport her.
 

Lexxi2006

Member
How Ironic that none of these shortcomings were recognized by your family, UNTIL she kicked you to the curb.

Congratulations, you are the reason that people in many countries call us ugly americans.

What you are proposing to do, is truly ugly, and you are a very vindictive and ugly person.

I wouldn't work for you either.
I couldn't have said it any better :cool: This person needs to realize that there comes a time to let go.
 

AHA

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Virginia

We have an aupair from Brazil on a J1 visa. She had one month left on her one-year program with us when she requested to rematch to another family. Her reasons were because we found out she was trying to rematch with another family right down the road from us who had tried to sneak their aupair back into the US on a B1 visa after her J1 expired.

Originally she said she wanted to go outside Virginia to see other states, but we found out she really wants to go to this family because she will have her own car, very easy working hours, and that we "cramp her active social life."

Problem is she was going to take a 3-week vacation prior to joining the other family...the au pair agency found out and was NOT happy as there can be no gaps in service if she changes families.

She has been trying to find ways to stay in the US illegally: tons of US Citizen male friends and she has been talking to money- and credit-lending businesses. But most important is that her childcare skills have gone down the tubes: our kids are scared of her and she has made our son's medical condition worse through stress.

We would like to send her back to Brazil, but she has the DS-2019 extension and can stay a year. If she goes to another family, we feel that family should be informed about these shortcomings, but the au pair agency doesn't want to pass on our info and feels she has the right to go to whatever family she chooses.

I have the contact info for State and the consulate where she got her visa. I have a security clearance and don't want to get dinged a few years from now because she was a visa overstay either. If we can't get her sent back, how do we make sure the new family is aware of our problems with her? Children could be injured because of her (and I can't go into detail about all that here...:mad:)
If she wants to live her illegally, then let her. That's her problem and moronic decision. Get her out of your house and focus on getting care for your sick child, that's where your priority as a parent should be, not seeking revenge on a stupid teenager on your payroll.
 
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AHA

Senior Member
Ummm, because the law says she can't do anything like that? :rolleyes: J1 visa holders are not allowed to work in other jobs, get credit, or take loans.
It is still not your problem. There are tens of millions of filthy illegals in this country, you think one more is going to make any difference?
 

Clean Sanchez

Junior Member
It is still not your problem. There are tens of millions of filthy illegals in this country, you think one more is going to make any difference?
That response is just more evidence as to why this country's official language will be Spanish within 50 years. By that token, why even bother voting????:mad:
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
That response is just more evidence as to why this country's official language will be Spanish within 50 years. By that token, why even bother voting????:mad:
Why did you hire a non-citizen for this job? Why didn't you hire a "nice" American CITIZEN to watch over your children??
 

mommyof4

Senior Member
Why did you hire a non-citizen for this job? Why didn't you hire a "nice" American CITIZEN to watch over your children??
In the words of Pink Floyd...

MONEY :D

Not to mention the fact that an American citzen would be aware of the fact that he or she has rights.

See what happens when you decide to economize on the wrong things? Some things are worth full price....like, say.....a competent nanny to watch your ill child. :rolleyes:
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
In the words of Pink Floyd...

MONEY :D

Not to mention the fact that an American citzen would be aware of the fact that he or she has rights.

See what happens when you decide to economize on the wrong things? Some things are worth full price....like, say.....a competent nanny to watch your ill child. :rolleyes:
Yeah! After the little criminal case we had here in Boston regarding a British Au-pair, one would think that parents would be more careful in choosing nanny's for their children!!
 

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