Man harrassed by female client

[VBLand]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Colorado

I work for a small, family owned landscape design and construction business. I am a male, aged 29, and am the only landscape architect on staff (employed here 7 years). It is necessary to meet clients multiple times at their residence during the planning stage, to visualize and discuss landscape presentations and proposals. I am also involved with project supervision of construction after planning and contracting stage. My job description is such that I am the clients point of contact starting with planning, contracting, construction, and through a year's warranty service.

Recently a female client has repeatedly and inappropriately touched me several times on all three design appointments at her residence so far. She is getting more blatant with each appointment, most recently touching my butt. I have discussed the problem with my boss (the firm is a small family owned company) and he laughs it off, and jokes about this making it easy to sell the job. But I want to tell the client this has to stop. It would be a big contract, and he said he does not want me to say anything to her to avoid offending her and thereby lose the job. I feel very uncomfortable and offended, and feel this is a most unprofessional situation. I don't think I can work with this woman over the lengthy period of design and construction. Further I feel angry at my boss for him refusing to allow me to take any action to stop this.

Is this sexual harassment? I do like my job and the company, but now I dread the thought of months of contact with this client. Furthermore, I am gay, which my boss recently became aware of. He does not approve or understand this but has been ok to work with. But now there is a great deal of tension between us. I worry that he may use my sexual orientation as an excuse to fire me if I handle this client situation myself. There is no protection in private employment regarding sexual orientation in this state.

I feel trapped in a very demeaning situation. How should I handle this situation and what are my rights?

Thanks for help.

[You Are Guilty]

So wait, you're saying that if the client was male, you wouldn't have a problem with it?

In any event, being that this is a client and not your employer, you have no case for sexual harassment.

[cbg]

I do not agree that there is no case for sexual harassment. While the lines of responsibility are not as clearly cut as it would be if it were another employee, if it would be sexual harassment in a co-worker or supervisor, it's sexual harassment now. It has been reported to the boss; the boss should have contacted the client and attempted to work it out. Since he failed to do so, the next step is the EEOC.

[JETX]

Though I agree with cbg that this is likely actionable harassment due to the employers failure to remedy, I suggest that you simply refuse to put yourself in that situation any further. Strongly, but professionally, advise the customer that you do not appreciate her contacts and don't allow them to continue. There should be no situation where you put yourself within arms length of her... short of her sneaking up on you.

Once the contract is signed..... then you can make arrangements for someone else to make the personal visits and limit your contact with her to your office/environment.

That way your situation is solved.... and you don't have to put your job or future on the line as would likely happen in the event of a complaint (I know.... retaliation is prohibited... but it WILL happen).

[VBLand]

Thanks Jetx and cbq. Ok, if I politely but firmly set my client straight, she may or may not decide not to work with me, a chance to take. If she does continue to work with me, I may be able to convince my boss to handle the project management of construction. I guess part of my concern is if I lose my job because she decides not to work with me, would I still have a harassment case if my boss lets me go but says my orientation has interferred with my ability to do my job? Can he also let me go under this pretense if I take this to the EEOC? Should I tell him I intend to tell the client to stop this behavior?

By the way, I would feel demeaned if ANYONE regardless of sex made advances like this, and I would feel just as trapped if I were prevented from addressing the situation to make it stop. I value the professionalism of my job. I mentioned my sex and the sex of the client only because I didnt know if harassment laws apply differently.

Thanks

[JETX]

Originally Posted by VBLand

I guess part of my concern is if I lose my job because she decides not to work with me, would I still have a harassment case if my boss lets me go but says my orientation has interferred with my ability to do my job?

Yes... and no.
The problem is... As long as your employer takes appropriate action in response to your complaint, it is unlikely that they would have any additional liability.
And though retaliation and/or termination is not allowed for filing such a claim, we all know that it does happen.... usually as a result of some other problem, real or created.

[You Are Guilty]

If you get canned over being gay (or for a pretext that you think is actually about you being gay), then you definately have a case.

And I respectfully disagree with the other posters. Once your boss tells the client to knock it off, I'd say he's discharged his duty. He is not responsible for controlling a non-employee's actions.

Although, if you're looking for a non-legal solution to this matter, tell the client something weird so that she wouldn't want to sex you up (but not too weird to make her cancel the job). Maybe casually let slip something like "You know, I really enjoy the freedom this line of work affords, especially after spending so many years in Tiajuana as an escort". (Feel free to use something else of course).

Good luck.

[VBLand]

It is my understanding that in the state of Colorado there is no laws protecting gay and lesbian workers from employment descrimination except if you work in the public sector, the private employers are not covered under this law. Under these circumstances, my understanding is you not only can be refused a job but also let go. So that is why I worry that it could be used to fire me. However, my boss has known this for six months, so maybe that would make a difference? I feel like the boss is enjoying seeing me squirm in this situation.

Maybe I can come up with something to tell her that can discourage her, maybe I will tell her I'm getting married or something.

[You Are Guilty]

I stand corrected, your state does not make sexual preference a protected class. "A jury verdict based only upon an instruction that plaintiff would not have been dismissed but for his sexual orientation did not support a violation of this section [re: discrimination]. Robert C. Ozer, P.C. v. Borquez, 970 P.2d 371 (Colo. 1997).

I'd rethink that "about to get married" thing though - for some women, that's a plus. How about telling her you have a raging case of dandruff or something along those lines instead?

[VBLand]

Thanks for the reply, but ok answer this -- am I just S.O.L. given this scenario: If my boss just up and fires me for my "sexual orientation", something he has known for 6 months, and the firing just happens to occur right after a client fires me for telling her to keep her hands off me (assuming my my boss wouldn't intervene). Wouldn't the EEOC suspect that was a bogus reason? Or would that just be considered a separate issue, of no concern to them? I realize if my boss took action in this case there would be no case, but if he takes no action, then what? Or what if he decides to fire me for that reason AFTER I go to the EEOC?

I agree with you about some women feeling a married guy is a plus (some men are like that too). I would really hate to tell a client anything about my health or personal life, that seems so unprofessional. This is a real dilemma.

Thanks,
VB

[You Are Guilty]

You do appear stuck between the proverbial rock and a horny woman. Worse, since sexual orientation isn't protected, there is no protection from "retaliation" by your boss. (For example, if I complained to the EEOC that I was being harassed on the basis of my hair color, not only would they not find any actionable discrimination, in turn, I could be fired the next day with no recourse since hair color is a non-protected reason to can someone.)

I don't see how your employer knowing about it and not firing you sooner "helps" you, although I suppose you can use it to try and support a rather weak argument that you were fired for a "bogus reason" (I do not why your boss would even need a "bogus" reason though since CO lets him fire you for being gay).

In the meantime, here's Plan "C". Tell the woman you just joined the priesthood and have taken a vow of celibacy.

[VBLand]

Ha Ha Ha!!!! Well at least you made me laugh....

Thanks for the advice, I am in a hard spot. You don't see why my boss would need to fire me for a "bogus" reason since he can fire me for being gay? He would fire me for the issue of losing the job after "insulting" the customer, or for complaining about sexual harassment, but he could just USE the gay reason as an excuse.

I want to keep my job, if I get fired I wont work in this field here again, the landscape industry is tight knit and close here. I'll have to figure something out, and real soon, as I have to see this woman tomorrow to go over the proposal. I asked her to have her husband there since he was the one that gave me a budget...and had set up a 7 PM time to meet to accommodate his work hours. But that was a mistake! She called me back and left a message that he was going to be out of town now....but she will still make the appointment...at 7 PM!

Geezzz!

[pattytx]

Well, if nothing else, she's persistent!

[You Are Guilty]

The solution came to me last night. Before you go to the appointment, put a bunch of potatos in your pants. (Just make sure to put them in the back or else you'll never get rid of her).

[mlane58]

Reminiscent of "Ace Ventura-Pet Detective" Great movie!