my boss asked me to sleep with his wife

[nedhlp234]

What is the name of your state? north carolina

My boss/good friend of 7years called me one night late and told me his wife wanted to sleep with me. I said i had had a few drinks and could not drive. He said that he would come get me and he did. So he came and picked me up took me to his house and , well, i slept with his wife. The very next week he started treating me different at work. I was in the middle of a huge project that i ran completely by myself so he could not get rid of me right away, but as soon as the project was over it didnt take long. My next project i was into for 1 month when i was fired. i met all goals and exceeded many goals for that first month. The reason given for firing me, was that he could not trust my decision making. In the examples that were given the decisions were originally made by the boss, and the others, were made by the person in charge between me and the boss, and the others were, well i can prove that they made lots of money on them after i left.... it has been over 12 mo since i was fired and i understand that with the state you must file a claim within that time, i am pushing --mo since i was fired, what should i do. There are many other sexual misconduct situations that could be brought up and i am sure plenty of witnesses willing to talk about other things. This is a VERY, VERY, large, nationally known buisness/celebrity that would be involved....
any advice would be appreciated...

 

[Sinsaint26]

As far as I can see you made a poor judgement call. He didn't put a gun to your head and he didn't tell you that your job depended on it. This was unrelated to work and you were not terminated because you slept with the bosses wife. You were an at-will employee and as such you were terminable at will. He could have fired you for chewing gum if he wanted to. Maybe he fired you because his wife said you weren't good enough, so long as he never told you your job depended on sleeping with his wife.
Besides you are about half a year too late on filing a complaint anyway. Move on and show a little more restraint if you are ever asked again.

 

[nedhlp234]

thanks for your time

Thanks for your reply. Are you an attorney? I can see where you are coming from in your response and i respect your view, but i tried to use self restraint by saying that i had too much to drink to drive and instead he insisted that he come and get me.... Would the result have been the same if i would have refused totally?? Who knows, but i really feel that i would have been fired for refusing his insistant offer as well...
How do you know i have passed the time frame by 6mo. I never said when this happened????

 

[cbg]

Because you said "It has been over 12 months since I was fired". Sinsaint may be wrong about how much over 12 months it's been, but if it's been over 12 months you're too late to file a discrimination claim anyway. Depending on your state and/or the type of claim, it's either 180 days or 300 days. Either way, you've passed it.

 

[nedhlp234]

other options

Thanks for your response,
Are there other options other than a discrimination suite, that may work into different time frames. I know from looking at the scroll menu on this site there are a million different type of suites. Just as an example, could i possibly sue him personally and work within a 24 month time frame???
Thanks again. I appreciate your time.

 

[Sinsaint26]

I am not a legal professional but I will tell you this. To file a complaint with the DOL it must be done within two years of the infraction or three if it is intentional. But the DOL only handles wage and hour, overtime, FMLA, and a few other issues unrelated to your case so that is not an option for you. The EEOC handles discrimination issues, retaliation and sexual harassment claims. Your case, if you stretch it very, very far may fall under a sexual harassment claim but as I said before you are too late.

You must file the complaint within 180 days of the day the discriminatory act took place (in your case the date of termination). You have already said that this took place a year ago so you are well past the deadline. When you do go through the EEOC they eventually give you what is called a "Right To Sue" letter. If you don't go through the EEOC within 180 days of the infraction and get your "Right To Sue" letter you have no right to sue. It isn't like small claims court where you can just walk in and file a lawsuit. There are legal hoops you must jump through first in order to take them to court. You failed to file any complaint in a timely manner and are left with only one option: move on.

 

[hmmbrdzz]

Have you talked to an attorney? You're way past any deadlines for the EEOC (if you ever had anything to file). You slept with bosses wife and got fired for poor decision making abilities (which is actually kind of funny). What do you want? Money? To smear the company's name? You can always be all-out gusty now and contact a staff writer or a reporter.


hmmbrdzz

 

[stephenk]

why have you waited so long to do something? what attempts have you made to look for a job in the past 12 months? did you apply for unemployment? If yes, did you get unemployment?

 

[stephenk]

Finally, was she good?

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

"Finally, was she good?"

=================================

My response:

Geez, I certainly hope so, or this whole situation was a waste!

Mystery at the gas station - - who pumped Ethyl?

IAAL

 

[cbg]

"The reason given for firing me, was that he could not trust my decision making. "

When you agreed to his asinine suggestion that you sleep with his wife, you proved his point.

 

[nedhlp234]

attorney

Have you talked to an attorney? You're way past any deadlines for the EEOC (if you ever had anything to file). You slept with bosses wife and got fired for poor decision making abilities (which is actually kind of funny). What do you want? Money? To smear the company's name? You can always be all-out gusty now and contact a staff writer or a reporter.


hmmbrdzz

I have talked to one attorney the other day and of course he said that i had waited too long. I know what you mean, and i did make a bad decision,,,,, but he asked me to do it. I busted my ass for him for years, and since the "incident" he obviously cant handle his bad decision, but is has not affected his future, his current income, or his invested efforts over the past years.
All of those things i realize i have waited to long to do anything about for myself...(if it were within the timeline, yes i would go after money and lots of it and hopefully his job along with it) But the reason i still persue questions is because i know that he is still up to his old tricks and him and his wife are still having relations with employees and employees are still getting fired when they get too close or when someone finds out too much. Its like a dictator out of control. I just happen to know more about all of the situations than probably anyone else. I guess at this point i will turn my focus to helping one of the other unfortunate employees file a possible suite.

Thanks again

 

[nedhlp234]

unemployment

why have you waited so long to do something? what attempts have you made to look for a job in the past 12 months? did you apply for unemployment? If yes, did you get unemployment?

Yes, i did apply for unemployment and yes i did get it.

 

[Sinsaint26]

Then you need to let it go and if he is still doing this to other employees, you need to let them deal with it.

 

[nedhlp234]

Re: unemployment

Yes, i did apply for unemployment and yes i did get it.

I was a little slow at the beginning and did not realize how many pieces of the puzzle there were to put together and how obvious the situation really was. This is not exactly something you can call your Dad and talk to him about. After i talked to some people and started realizing what had really happend i was still too embarressed too do anything right away and did not want to pursue anything without knowing i would win. I called an attorney one day right after it happend and he said i would have to file a claim with workers comp before he would talk to me. That kinda made me feel like i had to lay it all on the line before i could get any information. Would hate to have the whole family know about this and then find out he gets off on something stupid. Oh well, he and his wife are still up to there old tricks and i know enough now to educate some of the people involved, so that they will be able to do something. I can get 10+ people to testify to their sexual misconduct...
If nothing else i am going to have a meeting with his boss and tell him everything i know. It will probably keep me from working for that corporation again, but i promise, you they will find a way to get rid of him as well.

WAS IS GOOD???? YES, YES , YES!! SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE SHANNON DAUGHERTY