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reprimanded for breasts

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J

jengaboki

Guest
hailing from Pennsylvania

I was recently pulled into the VP's office and was subjected to a conversation about the appearance of my breasts, specifically my nipples. I am a new addition to this company and up to this point have been told nothing but positive things about my appearance and job performance. The VP told me repeatedly that she had not personally witnessed my "problem" but had heard comments and thought it best if she addressed them instead of my male supervisor. The conversation then moved to specific undergarment details ...I was educated on the wonders of padding and advised that I should consider wearing a thicker undergarment because many of the people that work here are "conservative" (I'm still trying to figure out what politics have to do with this).
I checked with the 6 coworkers that I spend 99.9% of my day with to see if my physical appearance had in anyway rendered them unable to perform their job annd was told by one coworker that someone from another dept had made detailed comments to her about my "problem" and asked my coworker to speak to me about it.
So do the comments made by one coworker to another about my body constitute harrassment? Does the specific nature of the undergarment i've been requested to wear fall under a uniform code? if I am required to wear something that specific does the company need to supply it and do they need to require all workers to wear it also?
Not sure what my next course of action should be. The company says that I meet all their dress requirements and have exceeded their expectations of job performance. Do they have the right to make these requests? Being singled out for a physical attribute over which I have no control seems parallel to requesting overweight people to wear girdles because the jiggling is distracting. I appreciate any guidance on this humiliating situation.
 


I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
jengaboki said:
hailing from Pennsylvania

I was recently pulled into the VP's office and was subjected to a conversation about the appearance of my breasts, specifically my nipples. I am a new addition to this company and up to this point have been told nothing but positive things about my appearance and job performance. The VP told me repeatedly that she had not personally witnessed my "problem" but had heard comments and thought it best if she addressed them instead of my male supervisor. The conversation then moved to specific undergarment details ...I was educated on the wonders of padding and advised that I should consider wearing a thicker undergarment because many of the people that work here are "conservative" (I'm still trying to figure out what politics have to do with this).
I checked with the 6 coworkers that I spend 99.9% of my day with to see if my physical appearance had in anyway rendered them unable to perform their job annd was told by one coworker that someone from another dept had made detailed comments to her about my "problem" and asked my coworker to speak to me about it.
So do the comments made by one coworker to another about my body constitute harrassment? Does the specific nature of the undergarment i've been requested to wear fall under a uniform code? if I am required to wear something that specific does the company need to supply it and do they need to require all workers to wear it also?
Not sure what my next course of action should be. The company says that I meet all their dress requirements and have exceeded their expectations of job performance. Do they have the right to make these requests? Being singled out for a physical attribute over which I have no control seems parallel to requesting overweight people to wear girdles because the jiggling is distracting. I appreciate any guidance on this humiliating situation.
My response:

When I'm feeling particularly "perky" on any given day, I just turn on the air conditioning, bringing the office down to about 49 degrees, and just "soak up" the view of my secretaries.

"I'm in heaven, I'm in heaven . . . ."

IAAL

P.S. Tell 'em all to "Bite me."
 
R

retertoooo

Guest
I like big butts and i can't deny you other brothers know when an itty bitty waist puts that big old thing in you face i get sprung.

so ladies ladies shake that big ole butt!!!


Well ok the boss thinks ya got big nipples, well i have no problem with that...the bigger the better.

But if they stand out in a crowd, you just might have to make a few adjustments to prevent the boss from staring. you can get breast pads, the ones that help prevent you from leaking while brest feeding...
 
Last edited:

Beth3

Senior Member
jengaboki, here's the real answer.

An employer may established a dress code and may use their judgement in determining what constitutes acceptable attire and grooming. That includes advising employees if something about their appearance, even if through no fault of their own, fails to meet their expectations in some way or is distracting - some organizations are more conservative than others. And a skirt length, for example, that is perfectly acceptable for employer A may be a problem for employer B.

While this situation is certainly more akward than most, it would be the same if you were wearing large and exotic earrings that didn't quite fit their bill.

No, this was not sexual harassment. Embarassing as heck for all concerned of course but it appears the company took pains to minimize that by having a female manager speak to you, rather than a male.

I've had the unfortuante experience of having to talk to the occasional employee who has had grooming/hygiene problems and I can tell you from experience that unless one is very specific about the problem and very specific about the solution, most employees don't get it. This VP didn't know whether you would fall in that category or not which is perhaps why she engaged in overkill in explaining how to resolve the problem.

While I know this was embarassing for you, the good news is that everyone else has a short memory for this type of thing (as most everyone is far more wrapped up in their own lives) and if you behave at work like it was no big deal and don't discuss it, it won't be.

And no, your employer does not have to purchase your clothing for you, even if they've advised you a different type of garmet would be more suitable.
 
S

sokowa

Guest
IAAL, after reading your posts, it appears you have no class...
 
A

anj

Guest
get over it

IAAL's comments were typical. They gave me a good laugh. We all know that men are pigs at heart-oink oink-and yet we love them anyway. Also, anyone who deludes themselves into thinking that the women don't check out the men just as often, needs to see a good proctologist to get their head out of their ass. And while I'm on a roll, 99% of the time, the females complaining about men looking at them, are women that the men don't want to look at anyway! Now before anyone has a cow, I'm not condoning sexual harrasment. There is a line that should not be crossed. I'm just saying lighten up and don't take life so seriously. Smile more, laugh more, you might actually enjoy your day.
 

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