Severe Emotional Distress, Is this a Protected Class Harassment?

[laurabelle]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kansas

My manager (M) has repeatedly harassed me throughout the years. But recently he caused severe emotional distress to me, and I'm going to report him to HR. I'd like to know if the following is a Protected or Non-Protected Class of Harassment: (this is the complaint I'm going to file with HR, so it's lengthy, but I tried to be as detailed as possible)

8/6/14 8:00am-9:15am
M came into the Print Shop and went straight to the Machine Shop. He spent approximately 15 minutes in there and came out, wondered around for a little bit and came over to where I was standing next to R’s desk. He asked me if I had signed off the NP forms for the battery orders yet. I replied no, that I was working with Sales on the dates, and once I figured out how all orders would fit together with the already approved dates, I would put in new dates and sign off the forms. He asked ‘what did I mean I was working with Sales’. I replied that Sales and I were working together on a spreadsheet that has all the information I needed in one place to determine due dates. His response is that he was unaware of such a spreadsheet. I informed him that I was told by Sa that she had emailed him and SB the spreadsheet at one time. (Sa has an email to confirm.) I also informed him that this was her tool to look at all orders in one place for better tracking. And that as soon as I was done inserting all the information that I was going to send him a copy. I just wasn’t finished yet, and didn’t want to send him partial information.
He then said that I need to be careful about what I say to Sales. He implied that Sales informs the customer about important information which should be employees-only privileged. He also said that I do not need to use that spreadsheet; I need to follow the process and procedures and fill out the NP forms. I replied that I will fill out the forms per procedures, but I need to see all orders at once to determine the appropriate due date. I said that the spreadsheet was just a tool to help me do my job. I also said that this is what we do with Ho orders and it has been working out very well. He again brought up that he had no idea about any spreadsheet for Ho, and that when Saemails the customer, she is emailing specific due dates of internal processes, such as paint, print, etc, and she shouldn’t do that. I informed him that Sa emails the customer only part of the spreadsheet every Friday, and he is always cc’d. He said that I shouldn’t be using that spreadsheet either. I replied that the only reason I was using that spreadsheet was because Engineering set it up initially and I was just following their lead. He said that wasn’t the truth and that ENG would never have started that spreadsheet. I felt very intimidated by that statement, because he was saying that I was lying. I again replied that B was the one that created it, N followed it, and when I took over the scheduling of Ho, I added to it. I share that information with Sales so they can be informed of where the product was, in case the customer had questions. He again said that Sales informing the customer of specific internal due dates was not appropriate and they shouldn’t be doing that. I replied that I can’t control what Sales tells anyone, only what I share. He again said that I need to watch what I share and say to Sales. I, again, felt like I was being intimidated to not communicate with the Sales Dept.
He got very upset about me using the spreadsheet, and I couldn’t understand why. I asked him numerous times to explain why he didn’t want me to use the sheet, but he was unable or unwilling to give me a straight answer. He said there is privileged information on there and it shouldn’t be included, that I should only use the NP forms. I said there is nothing on this spreadsheet that isn’t on the forms. There are part numbers, customer due dates, battery cost, ship dates, etc. I informed him that it was the same information that was on his NP Status spreadsheet that we go over every Monday. I asked him how he could use that spreadsheet, but I couldn’t use the same one, the only difference being that it was about Print Shop specific orders. He said that he has authority to use that spreadsheet and that I don’t. Again, I felt intimidated to not use a simple spreadsheet for my own benefit, but it was ok for him to use it.
He then said that he’s just out to protect me, and he doesn’t want things that I share with Sales to backfire and be used against me. At this point, I felt that he would retaliate if I continued to share things with Sales, by not ‘protecting me’ anymore. He said that there are people at AML that talk behind my back and say that I can get anything I want if I just go to DB. I felt by him stating this, he was trying to coerce me into believing that he was trying to protect me against everyone that doesn’t like me at the company. I told him #1 that I haven’t seen DB in months. #2 I don’t care what people say or think about me here. My concern is doing my job and creating a quality product for the customer and delivering it to them on time. He replied that I should be concerned with what people say. I told him that I have gone to numerous counselors and psychologists to train myself to not care about rumors that other people start. He replied with a statement that was extremely ridiculing and made me feel very uncomfortable, ‘I’d like to know why you need numerous psychologists’. I said, you don’t need to know.
I then told him that I was very frustrated with this conversation and that I needed to take a break. He was causing severe interference with my work performance and I needed to get back to my job. He caused severe anxiety to me and I wasn’t able to concentrate. I felt extremely degraded, because he didn’t think I knew what I was talking about, how things at the company worked, or how to do my job. I couldn’t understand what he wanted, despite asking several times to explain himself, only to be given a cryptic and a confusing answer. And when I repeated what his answer was to him, so that I could make sure I heard what he said, he would respond that it wasn’t correct, or he wouldn’t respond at all and start talking about something else. I was so confused and insulted by his actions that I could barely function.
I told him that I appreciated his insight but I, again, needed a few moments to put my thoughts together. I told him I would like an hour or more and that we could continue the conversation later that afternoon. He did not reply to that statement, but continued to bully me about the spreadsheet and my communication with Sales. I asked him what he wanted me to do exactly and I would follow his instruction, he only replied that I needed to follow procedure. I explained that I thought I was, and this spreadsheet was only an aid for myself to help me see the bigger picture. I asked him if having the spreadsheet as an aid was against procedure and he did not reply. At this point I just stopped speaking. He continued to speak about the Sales Dept, the spreadsheet, all my orders, the way I run the department, and how the company is supposed to run, according to him. I was so emotionally and physically degraded that I could not concentrate. I felt that he was harassing me about a minute point. He was making a scene in front of my staff and anyone that walked in the door. He did not suggest to go to another room, or to talk in private. I was extremely embarrassed for myself and for my team. It was obvious that he wasn’t going to leave and I couldn’t explain myself in any better way, so I just let him talk until he realized I wasn’t saying anything in return. He eventually stopped talking and walked out.
**I had numerous witnesses to this incident. One was RR, who sat at her desk and could hear everything very well. She has agreed to sign this as declaration of witness to the incident.

After that, I took 20 minutes to calm down and called J.
J came over later that day and we had a private conversation about the incident. I explained the story to J. I explained how frustrated I was with the entire hour long conversation; I also explained that M made it very difficult to do my job when he gets mad at me for a simple spreadsheet. J had little to say about the incident, except that there was always going to be conflict between sales and production and he said, ‘DO NOT stop communicating to Sales’. I replied that I understood the conflict between sales and production, but what M does is not just conflict. M purposely puts down Sales in staff meetings, blames them for the Service Dept not getting the orders they need or that they are holding up the techs to finish orders. I also told J that M insinuates that he hates everyone in Sales and he makes that point any chance he gets. I said that is more than just a little conflict; what he does is wrong. It’s not team work and it’s not what a good company should condone. He agreed, and again said that I need to continue to communicate with sales. I received little response as to my concerns on what to do about the argument concerning the spreadsheet, and M’s actions during that incident.


Thanks for reading, any advice is appreciated!
Laura

 

[Zigner]

Please post again, but cut it way way down. I got about half-way through and my eyes glazed over.

 

[Silverplum]

Probably not. http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/

 

[eerelations]

Please be advised that harassment is only illegal if it's based specifically and directly on things like your race, age, disability, religion and/or gender. If the harassment you're experiencing is based on one or more of these things, then it's illegal harassment, and your job is protected if you complain to HR about it.

However, if the harassment you're experiencing isn't based on any of these things, then it's legal harassment, and your job is not protected if you complain to HR about it. Whether or not this legal harassment causes severe emotional distress has no bearing on its legality.

 

[Zigner]

I know that my prior post was edited by the moderator, but I think it's important that it be said: I would seriously suggest that you pare down your complaint. A huge, verbose complaint such as that is much less likely to have action taken than a short, concise complaint. If you feel that you must include the entire thing, then I would suggest that you include a cover sheet with the pertinent points and use what you have written above as an attachment for reference.

 

[cbg]

Nothing you have posted comes even close to any form of protected class harassment, and I'm not certain I'd classify it as harassment at all.

 

[Just Blue]

I know that my prior post was edited by the moderator, but I think it's important that it be said: I would seriously suggest that you pare down your complaint. A huge, verbose complaint such as that is much less likely to have action taken than a short, concise complaint. If you feel that you must include the entire thing, then I would suggest that you include a cover sheet with the pertinent points and use what you have written above as an attachment for reference.

I can't imagine what the OP was before Admin did her edit.

 

[Zigner]

I can't imagine what the OP was before Admin did her edit.

That's pretty much it except real names were edited out by M. My first post included a comment about cutting it down because HR would never read through all of that. I think it might have been removed by mistake since it wasn't snarky or anything...

 

[Just Blue]

That's pretty much it except real names were edited out by M. My first post included a comment about cutting it down because HR would never read through all of that. I think it might have been removed by mistake since it wasn't snarky or anything...

Ahhh...I see. Thanks Zig.

 

[commentator]

What this is is a person who has worked at a place for a long time, has become terribly, terribly over emotionally invested in the day to day minutiae of the workplace, what he said, she said, they said, etc. Also, having spent a long time gainfully employed at the same place, this OP believes somewhere in his/her mind that employees have a lot more rights and privileges and benefits on jobs in this country than they do.

She thinks that somewhere out there, the government does surely administer some sort of fairness, does force employers to treat their employees decently, and that if it ever comes down to it, she can sue, or complain or file a grievance and her mistreatment and her complaints about it will be considered.

Sadly, this is not the case. No one should let every little thing that happens to them on the job cause them "extreme emotional distress." Because ultimately, the employer has nothing they have to do for you except pay you for the hours you have worked at the legal minimum wage. They cannot discriminate against you specifically as a member of a protected class, such as on the basis of your age, sex, religious affiliation, etc. They have to provide you with a safe workplace per OSHA.

But as far as requiring that your supervisors or co workers not cause you extreme emotional distress, that they speak to you respectfully, treat all the departments fairly, and provide you with warm fuzzy feelings for a job well done, there is nothing legal that says anything of the sort has to happen.

If someone hits you or physically assaults you on the job, you need to call the police and press charges against them. Otherwise, your problems in the workplace are just that, problems inside the workplace. These problems should be worked through with your own supervisors and co workers and HR. And believe me, no one, including your own HR is interested in the detailed play by play scenario we got of your conversations with your manager. No witnesses will be called. No one cares.

Back away. Try to condense this into a shorter, bullet point, specific complaint thing. Such as, "For the last five years, my supervisor xxx has shown me what I perceive to be disrespect. He has put down the people in sales. He doesn't listen when I speak. He gives me conflicting instructions."

No one cares how this makes you feel. Deal with it. It is NOT necessary for you to have extreme emotional distress. No one can give it to you except yourself. If your employer has an EAP and provides counseling services, perhaps you should take advantage of this to get your work life under control a bit better. I'm sure this is bleeding over into your home life and that you are spending hours stressing out about what is going on at your work. But sadly, unless you are motivated to quit the job or seek other employment, there's not much you can really do except deal with it better.

If you up and quit the job, and then filed for unemployment insurance, the system wouldn't be terribly interested in how your supervisor was causing you extreme emotional distress. Distress of this type is a "choice option" a way to react to the situation or the person's behavior. What they'd ask you, succinctly, is "What did you do to try to resolve the problem before quitting?"

Of course the first thing to do is discuss it with the person directly. Tell him how you feel. If he rudely tells you he doesn't give a $%^ how you feel, take it to the next level. Talk to them, without about 98% of the detail you give us here, about the problems you are having with this person.

Remember that what he does, and the effect he has is partially considered a management technique. If he is a successful manager, if his personal style, and his frequent criticisms and rough talk to his co workers is not being complained about by lots of people, and his departments are being successful, meeting their goals, etc., then his management style is working, even though it is causing you emotional distress. Companies are all about that bottom line. Does it work? Yeah, then he's golden.

Work smart, OP, don't let the turkeys drive you nuts. Learn exactly what they can and cannot do to you, which coming on here is a great start, incidentally, and work on your own feelings and behaviors to try to overcome this problem. Your outthinking this person, getting to a place where he doesn't get under your skin so terribly is a huge win for you. Good luck.