Advice and Information on dealing with aggressive teenagers at school.

[TroubledMind1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

I would really appreciate the advice or information here. I had a younger brother who just started high school. He's been being bullied by these kids that love to call him fat cracker.
Said kids were being obnoxious on the bus when he stood up and told them to stop. Some choice words were included, in which the one that is my brother's age made a remark and his older brother stood up and shoved my brother and said not to talk to his brother that way. My brother then decided to just sit back down. As they were getting off the bus and going their separate ways, the little one calls out and asks where my brother is going. He then proceeds to run up behind my brother and whacks him in the face twice--giving him a black eye. The kid runs off (my brother is quite a large boy and I assume the kid didn't want to go home with a black eye as well). We called a dispatcher for the kid assaulting my brother, but he basically said there is nothing we can do with Florida laws. It would cost us a leg and an arm just to get him in court, in which the kid and his family could not show up and get a small $50 fine. And the police officer offered us no other advice on how to handle aggressive teenagers.

My question for people on this forum is if this officer is in fact correct, and that it's not worth trying to charge the kid with battery against my brother. Or if there is a way we can use the law against the kid. We've already dealt with bullies and kids getting swings in on my brother. This is the first time he has come home with bruises though. Every time the kid gets off with some small detention at school and then still gets antagonized by said kids. Or nothing happens at all.

Does anyone know if Florida Law could be helpful? Should we charge this kid to teach him not to assault people for no good reason? And if no laws can help, what would you do in my situation?

 

[not2cleverRed]

I'm curious. Have you reported the incident to the school district's transportation dept? Or to the school itself?

 

[TroubledMind1]

We emailed the school, but due to this hurricane here in Florida and Labor day schools have been closed until Tuesday I believe. My mom tried sending an email but it wouldn't go through. We have to wait a good week before we even get to talk to the school or anything. As for the bus, the bus driver has seen these kids shove my brother, be obnoxious, call people names, and the bus was still there slowly pulling away as the incident was happening. Whether he personally saw it or not, I have no idea. But the bus has cameras, and there was an adult witness, and I assume the kids on the bus next to the windows definitely got a nice view of the incident as well. We had an incident like this at another school, where the kid hit my brother. My brother was gonna chase the kid down in class. He was stumbling on the desks when the teacher sent my brother out. My brother got ISS, the kid got nothing. I'm just tired of this happening. And I wanna nip it in the butt asap. Whether its the school that helps me, the bus company, or filing a report with the police.

 

[CourtClerk]

Take pictures of his face and call the police. I don't even know why this is a question. When someone is assaulted, you call the police FIRST.

 

[TigerD]

You do realize that the bullied kid very rarely goes to "chase the kid down in class." It sounds like your brother is the bully and he ran into some kids he can't bully.

TD

 

[CTU]

The bullied kid is a big fat boy. He has anger inside him like everyone else. He gets called fat and made fun of and doesn't like it. But he doesn't go around swinging at kids either. Until one starts swinging at him.

I think your vision of bullied kids is a little flawed. Kids who get bullied usually put up a fight. I can also link you to several posts where a kid was in a fight with said bullies and was still the bullied kid. One 13 year old even killed themself.

I came here for advice, not what you THINK happened.

Ironically you don't actually know what happened ... you were not present.

This has happened in two schools. Could the minor be instigating trouble himself once in a while?

 

[quincy]

You are calling your younger brother a "big fat boy," even though you know he doesn't like being called fat? That isn't very nice.



(I see your previous post, quoted by CTU, was deleted ... interesting)

 

[TroubledMind1]

Well I didn't delete it. I remember editing a post.

Im not saying the kids are wrong that he is fat. He doesn't like to be called fat. But he isn't looking at this forum anyways. Im not calling him fat to hurt his feelings. Im stating it as a matter of fact. Should I rephrase and use OVERWEIGHT? I mean, honestly, whats worse? Both aren't great, but neither are false.

 

[not2cleverRed]

If your brother isn't in counseling, he should be. He needs to learn coping skills. It is understandable that he gets angry, but his actions are neither socially acceptable nor useful.

I say this as someone who was bullied as a child. It is rarely useful to retaliate with force, and doing so sets you up for bad habits as an adult.

My advice is based on what I've done when my child was bullied on the bus. The bus driver has a boss. That's who you file a complaint with. However, because of your brother's actions, he could be disciplined as well. Frankly, if the boys can't behave, they should ALL be walking to school (your brother included). Their actions could distract the bus driver and endanger everyone's lives.

 

[TroubledMind1]

The previous incident was mentioned to show he's been bullied before. Kids who are bullied often get bullied in other schools at other locations.

THE MAIN INCIDENT is what happened on the bus. My brother did not use any such force with these kids. He was instantly made fun of in the mornings every day for a few weeks for being FAT. We decided to drive him to school in the mornings hoping that would resolve the issue. Instead the kids were playing this loud screeching noise on the bus that everyone was getting annoyed with, I know a lot of this information because his friend came over and told his own side of the story. In which is friend even got in between the kids and my brother so they didn't try to hit my brother. Even after being SHOVED my brother did not start a fight. He sat back down in his seat and then later got off the bus where the kid asked where he was going and then came up behind him and whacked him in the face. Then the kid ran away.

Do you all teach your kids to not hit back? I mean its all personal preference anyways, but my brother was taught to defend himself. And even in laws people are allowed to defend themselves, why should it not be different for children?

Thank you to the people here to actually give advice.

PS. he walked after the kid that hit him. In a small classroom with desks all over the place, I assume the kid panicked and made a bit of noise trying to get away. My brother never touched the kid. He was hit first and was going to hit back. This kid got no punishment where my brother got ISS. Which is why I mentioned issues with schools not doing anything.

 

[Zigner]

Well I didn't delete it. I remember editing a post.

Im not saying the kids are wrong that he is fat. He doesn't like to be called fat. But he isn't looking at this forum anyways. Im not calling him fat to hurt his feelings. Im stating it as a matter of fact. Should I rephrase and use OVERWEIGHT? I mean, honestly, whats worse? Both aren't great, but neither are false.

"Fat" has a much meaner connotation than "overweight"

 

[quincy]

The previous incident was mentioned to show he's been bullied before. Kids who are bullied often get bullied in other schools at other locations.

THE MAIN INCIDENT is what happened on the bus. My brother did not use any such force with these kids. He was instantly made fun of in the mornings every day for a few weeks for being FAT. We decided to drive him to school in the mornings hoping that would resolve the issue. Instead the kids were playing this loud screeching noise on the bus that everyone was getting annoyed with, I know a lot of this information because his friend came over and told his own side of the story. In which is friend even got in between the kids and my brother so they didn't try to hit my brother. Even after being SHOVED my brother did not start a fight. He sat back down in his seat and then later got off the bus where the kid asked where he was going and then came up behind him and whacked him in the face. Then the kid ran away.

Do you all teach your kids to not hit back? I mean its all personal preference anyways, but my brother was taught to defend himself. And even in laws people are allowed to defend themselves, why should it not be different for children?

Thank you to the people here to actually give advice.

PS. he walked after the kid that hit him. In a small classroom with desks all over the place, I assume the kid panicked and made a bit of noise trying to get away. My brother never touched the kid. He was hit first and was going to hit back. This kid got no punishment where my brother got ISS. Which is why I mentioned issues with schools not doing anything.

If your brother is physically assaulted, the police should be called. Period. The police will investigate.

If your brother fights back physically after he is verbally assaulted, he is the one who will be charged with assault, not those who are calling him names.

Although I am sure you want to defend your brother, you are not the one involved. This matter is one for your mother and brother to handle, through the police and/or through the school system. They are the ones who need to seek out legal assistance if they find it necessary.

 

[TroubledMind1]

Fat = Overweight. Don't get so sensitive about it. Im not here to have people get mad over the word FAT.

Im not here to make fun of my brother either by calling him fat. Im saying he is in fact an overweight boy. Who gets called fat and he gets made fun of. He did not call these boys names, he used some choice words to tell these boys to stop playing the screeching noise he could he through his headphones on a noisy bus, and then after everything was said, sat back down, and kept to himself even as they were getting off the bus; which then the boy said HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING and proceeded to assault my brother.

Again does this forum have people with actual advice? Or is this a forum full of judgmental people who only care to point out things that aren't really that relevant to my post.

 

[TroubledMind1]

If your brother is physically assaulted, the police should be called. Period. The police will investigate.

If your brother fights back physically after he is verbally assaulted, he is the one who will be charged with assault, not those who are calling him names.

Although I am sure you want to defend your brother, you are not the one involved. This matter is one for your mother and brother to handle, through the police and/or through the school system. They are the ones who need to seek out legal assistance if they find it necessary.

In this case, he was physically assaulted. He did not even go to swing at this kid. We already contacted the police in which nothing was done. As it is a family matter I think its our business how it is solved anyways. I came on a forum hoping others had similar situations and legal advice.

 

[quincy]

Fat = Overweight. Don't get so sensitive about it. Im not here to have people get mad over the word FAT.

Im not here to make fun of my brother either by calling him fat. Im saying he is in fact an overweight boy. Who gets called fat and he gets made fun of. He did not call these boys names, he used some choice words to tell these boys to stop playing the screeching noise he could he through his headphones on a noisy bus, and then after everything was said, sat back down, and kept to himself even as they were getting off the bus; which then the boy said HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING and proceeded to assault my brother.

Again does this forum have people with actual advice? Or is this a forum full of judgmental people who only care to point out things that aren't really that relevant to my post.

The advice is to let your mother and your brother handle the matter, through contact with the police and/or through contact with the school.

Legally, this is not your issue.