Complicated...I NEED HELP!

[purpletwinkie]

What is the name of your state? Texas

Ok, I have 4 boys who are 2 sets of twins. They will turn 13 and 15 this Summer. Their dad has had custody of them for several years and I have had visitation and paid child support. Their dad is having health problems and CPS was called. It was decided by CPS that the home was not clean enough for them to remain there and also that their dad is not physically able to care for them at this time. The boys all want to stay with their dad and they are temporarily all living with his parents at this time. His mother is bed-ridden and his step father cares for her. I have spoken with CPS and they have suggested that if the boys want to stay with their father, a nanny would have to be hired to make sure they go to school every morning and to be there for a few hours at night to make sure they are fed and have clean clothes, etc. My husband and I would have them every weekend. CPS has said that if this can not be done, the boys would be placed in our home instead. We would certainly allow them to live here, but my concern is what about the fact that they WANT to stay with their dad? At what age could they just leave here and go back to him? I'm not so sure that their dad and his parents are open to hiring a nanny, and I'm not quite sure why. My husband and I would help pay for a nanny to be there during the week on top of the child support I already pay. I just feel very confused and overwhelmed and any good advice would be helpful.

[ceara19]

If CPS removes them from dad's house, dad can't get the children back until he complies with the requirements outlined by CPS and a Judge approves the change or the children turn 18. In Texas, a child over 14 can express there preference to the court, but because CPS is involved, their wishes aren't going to be taken into consideration.

However, there is no reason that dad's house should have been so filthy that CPS decided remove the kids when they are more then old enough to keep the house clean if dad is ill. If they wanted to stay with him that bad, they would have been helping out.

[purpletwinkie]

Originally Posted by ceara19

If CPS removes them from dad's house, dad can't get the children back until he complies with the requirements outlined by CPS and a Judge approves the change or the children turn 18. In Texas, a child over 14 can express there preference to the court, but because CPS is involved, their wishes aren't going to be taken into consideration.

However, there is no reason that dad's house should have been so filthy that CPS decided remove the kids when they are more then old enough to keep the house clean if dad is ill. If they wanted to stay with him that bad, they would have been helping out.

Oh, I know and I completely agree. Apparently, though, they did not do that and so we are at this point now. My concern is having 4 angry young men in my home who do not want to be there. I would like to be able to figure out a solution to make everyone happy...including CPS. Thanks for your help!

[ceara19]

Originally Posted by purpletwinkie

Oh, I know and I completely agree. Apparently, though, they did not do that and so we are at this point now. My concern is having 4 angry young men in my home who do not want to be there. I would like to be able to figure out a solution to make everyone happy...including CPS. Thanks for your help!

They are going to have to accept the fact that if they want to live with dad (and you are willing to allow it and CPS will agree to it) that they are going to have to suck it up and start taking on some responsibilities around the house. At their ages, I can't see spending the money for a nanny to do things that the kids are able to do for themselves.

[purpletwinkie]

Originally Posted by ceara19

They are going to have to accept the fact that if they want to live with dad (and you are willing to allow it and CPS will agree to it) that they are going to have to suck it up and start taking on some responsibilities around the house. At their ages, I can't see spending the money for a nanny to do things that the kids are able to do for themselves.

Again, I agree. CPS, however, has said that that's the only way they will be able to stay with their dad.

[mommyof4]

Then it is up to Dad to comply with the stipulations set forth.