Girlfriend gets driving with restricted license while driving my car

What is the name of your state? Colorado

Ok so my girlfriend who is 16 (I'm 19...and no I'm not a sicko) was driving my car last night and at the moment only has her permit because of some deal with her parents. She left her house without her parents knowing, but we were out at 11:00, which is before curfew.

Anyways, I was following my buddy to a friends house and I decided to let her drive, since she really isnt a bad driver. My car is an 04' mazda 6, my name is on the car because I make the payments and I have full coverage insurance. So anyways, we come to a four way stop before getting onto the interstate, and my girl stops for a brief second and continues on like normal. Well it happens that we get pulled over for this, and we're left worried to ****.

The cop doesn't call my girlfriends parents, which first and foremost was most important, and she also (after waiting for about 20-30 minutes), issues my girlfriend, to my surprise, with driving with a restricted license, as opposed to driving without a license. So basically she can get her license on time, with the reduction of two points (I'm confused, from her permit or from her license??). Here's the catch, I feel pretty crappy about the whole situation, since I'm really in love with this girl and don't want to lose all the respect from her parents that I've gained, so I'd rather them not find out, because that's just what they need - an excuse to not like me. Because we were in the county, she can simply forge her parents signature, and mail the ticket and the money into the state department of revenue.

Our dilemma is this, it's a tossup between telling her parents a small lie about why she was out and with whom, and telling them about the violation. OR forging the signature and mailing it in without them knowing. Our concern is that when she does go to get her license this will be brought up.

Does anyone here know for sure if this would even be brought up if it was taken care of? She got hit with driving with a restricted license which carries a 2 point reduction.

I'd like advice from you who think you have good moral/legal/relational advice. Thanks!

[Blue Meanie]

You realize that forging someones siggy is a felony?? Are you prepared to visit your girlfriend in Juvenile Hall cause you don't want to be in the dog house with her parents???

I didn't realize it was a felony for a minor, but yes I realize it is illegal.

I'm just very unsure as to how her parents will react if they find out the straight up truth, knowing that their daughter snuck out. This is a really tough one. I really love this girl, and I want the very best for her. I have given her parents nothing but respect, and this is all I need - a reason for them to not trust me. Yes I know I was wrong, but ****ing **** this isn't quite fair. Hell, the reason we got stopped wasn't even legal, considering how our stop was completely legal.

I'm probably going to have her tell them the straight truth, and just try to reason with them. This is just really tough because I care about this girl so much, and she means so much to me, that it really isn't fair that this had to happen on such bull**** pretenses. We got pulled over for coming to a complete stop. Logic anybody??

[HomeGuru]

[quote=exsequor;1716449]What is the name of your state? Colorado

Ok so my girlfriend who is 16 (I'm 19...and no I'm not a sicko)

**A: hahaha, too funny.

ahahaha im glad you find it funny =P

[HomeGuru]

Originally Posted by exsequor

ahahaha im glad you find it funny =P

**A: what part do you think I find funny?

"(I'm 19...and no I'm not a sicko) "

=D

[HomeGuru]

Originally Posted by exsequor

"(I'm 19...and no I'm not a sicko) "

=D

**A: that's correct.

[CJane]

I guess you need to weigh how her parents are going to feel about you when they find out (and they will) that she snuck out of the house, drove illegally, got pulled over, kept it a secret and then - at your suggestion - forged their signature on an official document in order to avoid further penalties...

vs.

How they're going to feel about you when they find out (and they will) that she snuck out of the house, drove illegally, got pulled over, kept it a secret, and then made up a lie to avoid telling them what really happened and therefore avoid further penalties...

vs.

How they're going to feel about you when they find out (and they will) that she snuck out of the house, drove illegally, got pulled over, kept it a secret and then came clean eventually because she realized that they would find out and she would be in serious trouble.

And no, you don't show them respect. If you did, when she snuck out ot hang out with her, you would have told her to go home.

All I have to say is, we're still young and dumb. Her parents don't let her go out for much besides her school. I know I'm not respecting her parents by allowing her to sneak out, trust me I realize this. It's just our human nature to want to extend our time together beyond what her parents would normally allow. To me that doesn't mean I am disrespecting her, just her parents. I am fully conscious of all of this, and I have continued to encourage her to not sneak out (especially on school nights). But you have to also remember that we're both human, and we both enjoy doing things that aren't exactly responsible in the eyes of any good parent.

I think I'm trying to do the responsible thing by at least thinking every possible scenario through, and giving her the best advice in regards to the whole situation. it's apparent that forging a signature and mailing it in behind their backs is greedy and self-centered on my part. Trust me I realize this, it's just going to be a tough situation for both of us depending on how they react.

I'm not a bad guy, I go to college, I pay bills, I have a new car, I make more than some parents make in a year. I plan on going very far with my life, but I also want to make the right decision regarding what's right for her, what's right for our relationship, and what's right for her parents. Hopefully you can respect my stance. I am leaning towards being as upfront and honest with her parents as possible, regardless of what repercussions they could have on our relationship. It just isn't exactly an easy decision.

[CJane]

Originally Posted by exsequor

All I have to say is, we're still young and dumb. Her parents don't let her go out for much besides her school.

At 16, I didn't get to go out much either. Particularly with 19 year old boys, no matter how respectful they were to my face.

I know I'm not respecting her parents by allowing her to sneak out, trust me I realize this. It's just our human nature to want to extend our time together beyond what her parents would normally allow. To me that doesn't mean I am disrespecting her, just her parents.

But you said that you DO respect them. At least be honest about it.

I am fully conscious of all of this, and I have continued to encourage her to not sneak out (especially on school nights).

Again. Be honest. What have you said to her "Hey, I thought you were gonna stop sneaking out!? But hey, you're here and I'm happy to see you, so let's go!"

But you have to also remember that we're both human, and we both enjoy doing things that aren't exactly responsible in the eyes of any good parent.

Yeah, you're not grown-ups yet. I get it.

I think I'm trying to do the responsible thing by at least thinking every possible scenario through, and giving her the best advice in regards to the whole situation.

No. The responsible thing is to be honest regardless of the cost. Not just when it's going to have the fewest repurcussions possible.

it's apparent that forging a signature and mailing it in behind their backs is greedy and self-centered on my part. Trust me I realize this, it's just going to be a tough situation for both of us depending on how they react.

And it wouldn't exist at all if you weren't BOTH being disrespectful of her, her parents and your relationship.

I'm not a bad guy, I go to college, I pay bills, I have a new car, I make more than some parents make in a year. I plan on going very far with my life, but I also want to make the right decision regarding what's right for her, what's right for our relationship, and what's right for her parents. Hopefully you can respect my stance.

Not if your stance involves convincing a child to lie to her parents, no.

I am leaning towards being as upfront and honest with her parents as possible, regardless of what repercussions they could have on our relationship. It just isn't exactly an easy decision.

It should be. It really should.

Man if I look this bad, most of the duders I hung out with in high school must look like complete *******S. Thank you very much for the advice, CJane. I want nothing more than the best for this girl, as contradictory as you may think I sound, I really do. If that means telling her parents the straight up truth, than so be it. It's only greedy for me to encourage her to cover up something that will only get her in more trouble down the road. I feel I understand now, and I deeply hope her parents will give me a second chance.

[The Occultist]

You've just taken another step towards maturity. Good for you, and I wish you luck in this matter.

[stealth2]

Originally Posted by exsequor

I didn't realize it was a felony for a minor, but yes I realize it is illegal.

Not just for a minor.

I'm just very unsure as to how her parents will react if they find out the straight up truth, knowing that their daughter snuck out. This is a really tough one. I really love this girl, and I want the very best for her No, you really don't appear to. Or you would not have gone along with her sneaking out.. I have given her parents nothing but respect mmmmmmm No again. Going along with her sneaking out was anything BUT giving them respect., and this is all I need - a reason for them to not trust me. Well, when you decide to play, you do eventually have to pay for it. Yes I know I was wrong, but ****ing **** this isn't quite fair. Hell, the reason we got stopped wasn't even legal, considering how our stop was completely legal.

Actually, having a quick glance at CO licensing requirements, it's entirely likely that the "stop" was an excuse, but the real reason was that she's under 18 and you're under 21 - she's not permitted to drive with anyone under 21 until she's at least 18. *oops* Did y'all not realize that?

You should both also be aware that this little fiasco of yours may cost her parents an increase in insurance permiums. If she were my child, I can tell you it would be a cold day in hell before she got her license while in my home - AND she's be getting a job to pay for the premium increase. Oh, and yeah - she wouldn't be seeing you anymore, either.

Oh, as an added bonus, since your car was the one on her ticket - your premiums may go up too!

Have a nice day.