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Informal Emancipation for 16 y/o?

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EvangelinesLost

Junior Member
I live in Louisiana; I am 16 years old, turning 17 this August (7 months away)

My Question:
I am looking for steps and information on obtaining an informal emancipation; where you are living apart from your parents without actually being emancipated.

My reason:
My home life is not...emotionally or mentally nurturing, in fact it is quite the opposite; I have been verbally abused my entire life and my father used to physically abuse me with belts until I was of age to speak out against him (i.e. 14). I have literally had to emotionally care for my mother due to her bipolar and chronic depression (caused her gambling addiction) which has led us to several financial disruptions (twice she did something where she was going to be arrested but we managed to weasel out of it with the help of family). I have had an un-diagnosed eating disorder for a couple of years now and constantly my mother and sister tell me not to eat and point out how much I am or am not eating. When I have even the slightest mood change (I am afraid to cry because of past instances) my mother will childishly bring it up hours after the fact asking me why I was being so nasty and hateful even though she knows I was recently discharged from a psychiatric hospital (its been about 9 months) for self-harm and severe depression; a lot goes on in my family and I am expected to listen to my sister's fiancee troubles, care for my mother's emotional needs, as well as pass all my classes for my home-school which is an online charter school, yet I am still constantly berated and belittled.


BOTTOM Line
I don't hate my parents and I don't intend to be recognized as a full-fledged adult or make anything legal; I have a friend in California willing to pay for all the expenses to get me to her, and she will allow me to thus live with her and her fiancee while I work on getting a job and such. [I have a plan in place, recognized by my school, which describes my graduating the end of my jr. year, which is in 4 months].

My parents will most likely NOT give any written consent for me to move in with said friend and I am troubled by the thought of going to court or getting a lawyer and making this some big deal... (especially since no one will be able to pay for that) So, yeah. How do I go about this in the easiest manner? :)
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I live in Louisiana; I am 16 years old, turning 17 this August (7 months away)

My Question:
I am looking for steps and information on obtaining an informal emancipation; where you are living apart from your parents without actually being emancipated.

My reason:
My home life is not...emotionally or mentally nurturing, in fact it is quite the opposite; I have been verbally abused my entire life and my father used to physically abuse me with belts until I was of age to speak out against him (i.e. 14). I have literally had to emotionally care for my mother due to her bipolar and chronic depression (caused her gambling addiction) which has led us to several financial disruptions (twice she did something where she was going to be arrested but we managed to weasel out of it with the help of family). I have had an un-diagnosed eating disorder for a couple of years now and constantly my mother and sister tell me not to eat and point out how much I am or am not eating. When I have even the slightest mood change (I am afraid to cry because of past instances) my mother will childishly bring it up hours after the fact asking me why I was being so nasty and hateful even though she knows I was recently discharged from a psychiatric hospital (its been about 9 months) for self-harm and severe depression; a lot goes on in my family and I am expected to listen to my sister's fiancee troubles, care for my mother's emotional needs, as well as pass all my classes for my home-school which is an online charter school, yet I am still constantly berated and belittled.


BOTTOM Line
I don't hate my parents and I don't intend to be recognized as a full-fledged adult or make anything legal; I have a friend in California willing to pay for all the expenses to get me to her, and she will allow me to thus live with her and her fiancee while I work on getting a job and such. [I have a plan in place, recognized by my school, which describes my graduating the end of my jr. year, which is in 4 months].

My parents will most likely NOT give any written consent for me to move in with said friend and I am troubled by the thought of going to court or getting a lawyer and making this some big deal... (especially since no one will be able to pay for that) So, yeah. How do I go about this in the easiest manner? :)
You wait until you turn 18 and then move out. Until then your parents control where you live. If you have issues, contact a school counselor -- they are mandated reporters and can contact CPS. It your situation is that bad, you will be removed from your home and placed with relatives (in-state) or foster care.
 

EvangelinesLost

Junior Member
You wait until you turn 18 and then move out. Until then your parents control where you live. If you have issues, contact a school counselor -- they are mandated reporters and can contact CPS. It your situation is that bad, you will be removed from your home and placed with relatives (in-state) or foster care.
I tried that when I was in public school, nothing happened. Aside from that, I don't want the legal trouble of being removed from my home; I have no family in-state; and there are plenty of sources that say if it is in my best interest then I should be able to live with a friend. Foster care is detrimental to my future, no thanks... :(
 

anearthw

Member
If your parents do not agree, then it will not happen - end of.

I won't smack my head against a brick wall to try and convince you, but in 10 years when you look back, you will be quite disturbed to realize that an apparent-adult woman (since she is engaged, I assume she is an adult) would actually be willing to pay to bring a teenager across state lines to live with herself and her adult partner. A youth at risk (you) is very vulnerable to exploitation in such a manner. Do you even know this adult friend in person? Or the internet?

Understand that if you are unwilling to be legally removed or pursue foster care (which is nearly all cases, a perfectly safe alternative to life in a difficult home), then you can wait until you turn 18. Good luck to you, but the law is set up to protect you from yourself, and it sounds like that is a good thing in this case.

And if you are considering leaving anyways, understand your friend can be charged with a felony, amongst other criminal action.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I tried that when I was in public school, nothing happened. Aside from that, I don't want the legal trouble of being removed from my home; I have no family in-state; and there are plenty of sources that say if it is in my best interest then I should be able to live with a friend. Foster care is detrimental to my future, no thanks... :(
Then your choice is to stay with your parents. Your "friend" can get in big legal trouble for paying for you to cross state lines if your parents do not agree. What you want seems detrimental to your future.
 

FlyingRon

Senior Member
And get it out of your head that "emancipation" (despite what you know of the word from your fifth grade social studies class) has NOTHING to do with freeing from parental enslavement. It is official recognition that an already independent minor needs relief from certain things denied to non-adults such as the ability to sign contracts.

We don't turn out abused (even if you were abused) to live on their own. Ain't going to happen.
 

cbg

I'm a Northern Girl
there are plenty of sources that say if it is in my best interest then I should be able to live with a friend. Foster care is detrimental to my future, no thanks

None of which changes the fact that under the law, there is no way for you to move out without your parents' consent without you being returned home or without anyone who encourages you to run away to cross state lines, ending up in legal trouble. Jail is very much a possibility. Either your parents consent, or you don't go. Not without a very real risk of jail for your friend and the certainty of you being sent right back home.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I tried that when I was in public school, nothing happened. Aside from that, I don't want the legal trouble of being removed from my home; I have no family in-state; and there are plenty of sources that say if it is in my best interest then I should be able to live with a friend. Foster care is detrimental to my future, no thanks... :(
"Informal sources," no doubt.

One characteristic of adults is patience. Another is the ability to view issues from a long-term perspective. You are clearly not at that stage of maturity.
 

dave33

Senior Member
I live in Louisiana; I am 16 years old, turning 17 this August (7 months away)

My Question:
I am looking for steps and information on obtaining an informal emancipation; where you are living apart from your parents without actually being emancipated.

How do I go about this in the easiest manner? :)
I believe you already know the answer, you just don't like it.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Not going to happen w/o your parents' consent, sorry. Even if you could do it formally (in terms of legalities), it is highly doubtful that a court would emancipte a minor w/no job, and several self-admitted emotional/mental issues. That's just reality.
 

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