Juvenile Restraining Orders and Protective Orders

[Havocide]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

I have a question regarding juvenile restraining orders or protective orders. A little background, my family and I live in Ohio, my wife and I have a 13 year old daughter that has never been in trouble and does well in school. Recently my daughter has been sneaking around meeting a boy that is one grade ahead of her in school. She is in 8th grade and he is a freshman and in 9th grade. The boy has been in trouble in the past and has been in and out of juvenile detention. He cuts himself, takes pictures of it and posts this kind of stuff on Facebook. I'm not sure what my daughter can possibly see in this kid but nevertheless she likes him. Today my daughter was suppose to go to an after school event at the library. My wife dropped her off at the library and watched her go into the library. When it came time for us to pick her up she was no where to be found. We immediately thought she could be with this kid. My wife went to the police station and told them of what was going on for the 2nd time. They ended up finding our daughter with the boy we suspected she was with in an abandoned house here in town with two other boys.. The boys locked the abandoned door to the house and my wife kicked the front door in to see kids scattering from the house.. The police later found our daughter and brought her home to us.

This kind of behavior really has my wife and I scared for the safety of our daughter. We know this boy is trouble and we don't want her to even be in contact with the kid. The boy (which is high school) shows up at the Jr. High and tries to see our daughter after school. The principle of the Jr. High has warned this boy multiple times that he is not to hang out at that school because he does not attend the school. I understand that our daughter and this boy meeting is consensual but her mother and I forbid her from seeing this kid.

So my question here is can we acquire a restraining order against this boy which is a juvenile to keep him from coming in contact with our daughter as she is only 13? The police have advised us that we can file unruly charges against our daughter and have her put on probation. It's hard for any parent to put their kids into the system at such a young age. What are our options here for restraining orders or protection orders for our daughter? Thank you in advance!


Phil

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

I have a question regarding juvenile restraining orders or protective orders. A little background, my family and I live in Ohio, my wife and I have a 13 year old daughter that has never been in trouble and does well in school. Recently my daughter has been sneaking around meeting a boy that is one grade ahead of her in school. She is in 8th grade and he is a freshman and in 9th grade. The boy has been in trouble in the past and has been in and out of juvenile detention. He cuts himself, takes pictures of it and posts this kind of stuff on Facebook. I'm not sure what my daughter can possibly see in this kid but nevertheless she likes him. Today my daughter was suppose to go to an after school event at the library. My wife dropped her off at the library and watched her go into the library. When it came time for us to pick her up she was no where to be found. We immediately thought she could be with this kid. My wife went to the police station and told them of what was going on for the 2nd time. They ended up finding our daughter with the boy we suspected she was with in an abandoned house here in town with two other boys.. The boys locked the abandoned door to the house and my wife kicked the front door in to see kids scattering from the house.. The police later found our daughter and brought her home to us.

This kind of behavior really has my wife and I scared for the safety of our daughter. We know this boy is trouble and we don't want her to even be in contact with the kid. The boy (which is high school) shows up at the Jr. High and tries to see our daughter after school. The principle of the Jr. High has warned this boy multiple times that he is not to hang out at that school because he does not attend the school. I understand that our daughter and this boy meeting is consensual but her mother and I forbid her from seeing this kid.

So my question here is can we acquire a restraining order against this boy which is a juvenile to keep him from coming in contact with our daughter as she is only 13? The police have advised us that we can file unruly charges against our daughter and have her put on probation. It's hard for any parent to put their kids into the system at such a young age. What are our options here for restraining orders or protection orders for our daughter? Thank you in advance!


Phil

Let's think outside the box a little, Phil.

What are the consequences when Princess goes against your orders?

 

[Havocide]

Let's think outside the box a little, Phil.

What are the consequences when Princess goes against your orders?

Her mother and I have taken away communication devices (computers, cell phones, extracurricular activities) when she does not follow our rules. We thought that we got through to her the first time she was being sneaky but obviously not. Now we are looking for legal options to keep this kid from disobeying our requests to stay away from our daughter. I'm looking for professional legal advice not "outside the box" opinions on parenting.

 

[Proserpina]

Her mother and I have taken away communication devices (computers, cell phones, extracurricular activities) when she does not follow our rules. We thought that we got through to her the first time she was being sneaky but obviously not. Now we are looking for legal options to keep this kid from disobeying our requests to stay away from our daughter. I'm looking for professional legal advice not "outside the box" opinions on parenting.

Read the TOS of the site, please.

 

[Havocide]

Read the TOS of the site, please.

My mistake. I was under the assumption this forum might provide valuable and intelligible responses to my problem. Thank you Proserpina for showing me early on the quality of responses to come so I don't waste anymore time responding to useless information.

 

[Proserpina]

My mistake. I was under the assumption this forum might provide valuable and intelligible responses to my problem. Thank you Proserpina for showing me early on the quality of responses to come so I don't waste anymore time responding to useless information.

Sigh. I'm sorry you missed the point completely.

All too often, people come here with a knee-jerk reaction of "What can we do legally to/about this person/situation?".

That's fine - and very often it's a genuine issue.

But all too often, particularly in juvenile and family law, parents don't think outside of the box. What can THEY do to correct the child's actions? Because essentially, it's your daughter you need to correct.

Sure, the boy might be a pest. And in OH, you may well be able to get some sort of restraining order - but what is that going to accomplish? She's going to sneak around anyway, isn't she?

So, a more practical approach would be to see what you can do about HER actions. Taking a tantrum here isn't going to help her, is it?

You're welcome.

 

[Ohiogal]

My mistake. I was under the assumption this forum might provide valuable and intelligible responses to my problem. Thank you Proserpina for showing me early on the quality of responses to come so I don't waste anymore time responding to useless information.

Yes you can file in juvenile court for a restraining order against the boy. Of course your wife vandalized the vacant house which is also a problem. She had NO RIGHT to kick in the door. But a restraining order CAN be obtained against the boy.

 

[Ohiogal]

Sigh. I'm sorry you missed the point completely.

All too often, people come here with a knee-jerk reaction of "What can we do legally to/about this person/situation?".

That's fine - and very often it's a genuine issue.

But all too often, particularly in juvenile and family law, parents don't think outside of the box. What can THEY do to correct the child's actions? Because essentially, it's your daughter you need to correct.

Sure, the boy might be a pest. And in OH, you may well be able to get some sort of restraining order - but what is that going to accomplish? She's going to sneak around anyway, isn't she?

So, a more practical approach would be to see what you can do about HER actions. Taking a tantrum here isn't going to help her, is it?

You're welcome.

The boy will end up being put in DYS if he violates the restraining order.

 

[Havocide]

Yes you can file in juvenile court for a restraining order against the boy. Of course your wife vandalized the vacant house which is also a problem. She had NO RIGHT to kick in the door. But a restraining order CAN be obtained against the boy.

Yeah I agree, I think in a fit of rage she did what any parent would do to get to their child. I'll pay the $20 lock replacement for the door in small claims. I figured I'd get some information here first before going to the county courthouse as this just happened today. This is not a case of a 16-18 year old teenager that's close to adulthood. This involves a 13 year old child that has a lot of trust to gain back.

 

[Ohiogal]

Yeah I agree, I think in a fit of rage she did what any parent would do to get to their child. I'll pay the $20 lock replacement for the door in small claims. I figured I'd get some information here first before going to the county courthouse as this just happened today. This is not a case of a 16-18 year old teenager that's close to adulthood. This involves a 13 year old child that has a lot of trust to gain back.

Paying the $20 lock replacement does NOT change the crime your wife committed. It was a CRIMINAL act. It could be considered a felony depending on the actual details.

And I answered that -- you can get a restraining order against the boy. You do need to strictly parent your daughter though. It is NOT the boy's fault that she made bad choices. That is HER fault.

 

[Havocide]

I understand that our daughter and this boy meeting is consensual

Yes, we have come to terms with that.

 

[Eekamouse]

Your daughter obviously is not going to care about any restraining order and will violate it to see this boy behind your back. Have you tried to get to know the boy at all? Or are you jumping to conclusions based on what you've heard about him? You trying to keep them apart is only going to make it more exciting for your daughter, in my opinion.

 

[Ohiogal]

Your daughter obviously is not going to care about any restraining order and will violate it to see this boy behind your back. Have you tried to get to know the boy at all? Or are you jumping to conclusions based on what you've heard about him? You trying to keep them apart is only going to make it more exciting for your daughter, in my opinion.

The daughter would NOT be restrained. The problem becomes that the daughter was involved in illegal activity with the boy. If he files, he may open a whole heck of a can of worms. Wife kicked in the door but daughter BROKE IN to the house first. He needs to realize that his little angel committed a crime and unless he gets control of his daughter's behavior, a restraining order won't do much.

 

[Havocide]

Your daughter obviously is not going to care about any restraining order and will violate it to see this boy behind your back. Have you tried to get to know the boy at all? Or are you jumping to conclusions based on what you've heard about him? You trying to keep them apart is only going to make it more exciting for your daughter, in my opinion.

This boy has been in and out of juvenile detention multiple times, hangs out with other trouble making kids, posts pictures on Facebook of him cutting himself with razorblades.. I'm judging him off what I am seeing with my own two eyes, not off rumors or hearsay. I understand that she is in "Love" and being a teenager, but I am the adult, the parent, and the rule maker. My wife and I are still debating the pros and cons of filing unruly with her. Getting put on probation would be a nice incentive to stay away from the boy if she knows its possible it could result in going to the detention center. Making threats, and taking away privileges is only going so far. I think right now it all boils down to trust and it's defiantly lacking.

 

[Proserpina]

The boy will end up being put in DYS if he violates the restraining order.

That's very true, yes.

(And so is what you said later)