My son being at people's houses

[brranndon]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York
Hello. I am a single mother of two kids. My oldest daughter is 24 and my son is 13. My son has a friend in which he seems to spend most of his time at,at their house and it bothers me. The girl is 13 and she lives with her father, mother, and older sister. Is there any way that I can press charges against that family for having my son there so much?

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

No, however, you can start exercising parental control over your child by requiring they refrain from visiting or ground them. I am surprised you have a 24 year old and have not learned this basic parenting skill. I suspect you are the child and are attempting to discover a way to thwart moms authority, because you are doing the horizontal shuffle with another 13 year old.

 

[sandyclaus]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York
Hello. I am a single mother of two kids. My oldest daughter is 24 and my son is 13. My son has a friend in which he seems to spend most of his time at,at their house and it bothers me. The girl is 13 and she lives with her father, mother, and older sister. Is there any way that I can press charges against that family for having my son there so much?

On what basis do you think you could press charges against the parents of this friend of your son's? Simply because he spends too much time there? Do you have any idea how ridiculous that sounds?

As a parent, it's your job to know where your child is at all times. If your son is going somewhere you don't want him to be, that's an issue with your own control over him. If you don't want him there, tell him that he can't go. Let this girl's parents know that he is not allowed to be over there so much, to please call you if he shows up to verify that he was allowed to be there, and to send him home if you didn't give your permission.

There is, of course, one very important thing to consider. Why is your son spending so much time over there? Is it possible that he has a bit of a crush going on with the girl? If so, it might behoove you to take the time to actually go over to the house and meet with the family to discuss how you feel and what you all can do to keep control of the situation.

 

[stealth2]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New York
Hello. I am a single mother of two kids. My oldest daughter is 24 and my son is 13. My son has a friend in which he seems to spend most of his time at,at their house and it bothers me. The girl is 13 and she lives with her father, mother, and older sister. Is there any way that I can press charges against that family for having my son there so much?

I guess I am confused. Why do you think it is their responibility? YOU are his parent - they are not. If you don't like him spending so much time at their home, then it is YOUR job to keep him from doing so.

What do you think is going on? COULD they be having sex? Sure, they could be. Or... they could just be friends. My son has always had a lot of friends who were girls. Actually, more than friends who were guys. He spent time in their homes, they spent time here - it was all purely platonic.

Have you actually talked to your son to find out what his relationship with this girl is? Why you are uncomfortable with his spending so much time there? Have you spoken to him openly about the consequences of sex, and how drastically it could affect his life/future? My kids were very aware what a teen pregnancy would mean to them and their future goals/dreams. Have you and your son had this conversation? You need to.

Being a single parent is irrelevant. Totally.

 

[Proserpina]

I'm also not convinced this is actually Mom posting.

Right, Brranndon?

 

[stealth2]

Well... if it IS the 13yo kid... Son... Your Mom is the boss of you. You do what she says. Period.

You're old enough to have had sex ed in school. Not health - Sex Ed. You know how babies are made. PenisA -> VaginaB = Baby. You should assume EVERY time that you could be making a baby. And if you do? Your life will change drastically.

If you were MY kid? You could forget extracurriculars. You could forget going away for college. Because you would be working to pay child support for that child. Period. End of Story. If you want to play at being an adult? You will take the consequences of being one.

Now, both of mine knew that, if they chose to have sex even despite that? All they had to do was tell me, and I would make sure that they were protected as best as possible. I hope your Mom is as open.

But, really? At 13? You're too young to be a daddy. And if you don't care about yourself? Think about your little g/f. Is that REALLY what you want to leave her with?

 

[NellieBly]

Brandon, your mom could get a restraining order against that family.

Then you couldn't go over there at all.