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Son accused of sexual harassment

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aricci111

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA
I received a call today from the principal at my sons school. My son is being accused of sexual harassment for tipping up a girls cheerleading skirt.
Apparently he was walking down the hallway with his girlfriend (who is a cheerleader), she was wearing her cheerleading uniform for the game that is later tonight. My son asked her what do you wear under that anyway? and tipped up her skirt exposing her cheerleading "bloomers" that were underneath. A teacher saw what he did and took him to the office.

The girl he is dating did not make a complaint against him. But the school is giving him a 3 day out of school suspension for this.

My son plays football and has certainly seen this girls "bloomers" before... and certainly was not harassing her. While I agree it is innapropriate for him to do this in the school hallway...I'm not certain it is sexual harassment.

My question is, Is this truely considered sexual harassment if she does not make the complaint against him?
 


Isis1

Senior Member
It is definitely inappropriate behavior. Since they are referring to a sexual misconduct, and if she is under the age of consent, she can't consent to this behavior.
 
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CdwJava

Senior Member
My question is, Is this truely considered sexual harassment if she does not make the complaint against him?
Apparently they believe it is.

"Sexual harassment" will be a school policy issue, though it might be defined somewhere in state law covering education law. There should be a process to appeal the suspension and you should probably try to find out the policy on sexual harassment and how it is defined before that appeal.
 

Momto1

Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA
I received a call today from the principal at my sons school. My son is being accused of sexual harassment for tipping up a girls cheerleading skirt.
Apparently he was walking down the hallway with his girlfriend (who is a cheerleader), she was wearing her cheerleading uniform for the game that is later tonight. My son asked her what do you wear under that anyway? and tipped up her skirt exposing her cheerleading "bloomers" that were underneath. A teacher saw what he did and took him to the office.

The girl he is dating did not make a complaint against him. But the school is giving him a 3 day out of school suspension for this.

My son plays football and has certainly seen this girls "bloomers" before... and certainly was not harassing her. While I agree it is innapropriate for him to do this in the school hallway...I'm not certain it is sexual harassment.

My question is, Is this truely considered sexual harassment if she does not make the complaint against him?
If he saw them before, why was he asking what was under her skirt. Maybe you should teach your son how to be respectful and he wouldn't be in this situation to begin with :rolleyes:
 

aricci111

Junior Member
Thanks for the response

We are contacting an attorney. He will soon be off to college and does not need this on his record.

She is under the age of consent, however there are all kinds of sexually innapropriate activities happening in the school hallways. In my opinion, If both parties are consenting to the activities it shouldn't be considered sexual harassment rather inappropriate behavior? In the school handbook it does state this offense is in the same category as starting a fire or bringing a weapon to school.
 

Isis1

Senior Member
We are contacting an attorney. He will soon be off to college and does not need this on his record.

She is under the age of consent, however there are all kinds of sexually innapropriate activities happening in the school hallways. In my opinion, If both parties are consenting to the activities it shouldn't be considered sexual harassment rather inappropriate behavior? In the school handbook it does state this offense is in the same category as starting a fire or bringing a weapon to school.
A lot of women get raped and their attackers get away with it. So the one attacker that does get caught should be set free since "everyone else" got away with it?

You're worried about his record and not his behavior? REALLY?
 

aricci111

Junior Member
A lot of women get raped and their attackers get away with it. So the one attacker that does get caught should be set free since "everyone else" got away with it?

You're worried about his record and not his behavior? REALLY?

Are you even serious? I am not saying it is APPROPRIATE or that he should GET AWAY with it. But accusing him of Sexual Harassment is slightly harsh in my opinion. This is not a random girl in a hallway whos skirt he was tipping. This is his girlfriend of 2 years. He wasn't even doing it in a sexual way?! he isn't an attacker or a rapist?
The comment referring to the sexual misconduct happening in the hallways was meant to say there are kids making out in hallways, Calling girls sluts and whores, etc.
Was it appropriate?...no.
Is it sexual harrassment? .... in my opinion no.
 

cbg

I'm a Northern Girl
If he did this to a co-worker in the course of his employment, it would unquestionably be sexual harassment. So why should it not be considered so in a school setting?
 

cyjeff

Senior Member
Okay... allow me to put it this way.

When is it NOT sexual harassment to pull up a girl's skirt in a high school hallway?

You say it is inappropriate behavior. I agree. I am curious as to WHY you think it was inappropriate.

Was it because he shouldn't be doing that? Agreed.
Because boys shouldn't be picking up girl's skirts in a school hallway? Agreed.
Because boys should keep their hands the hell off a girl's ass in school? Agreed.

Unless your son does this to the boys he knows, are you saying there WASN'T a sexual aspect to this?

If I was her dad (and I am the step father to a 17 year old), I would have your son CRIMINALLY charged for a sexual misconduct so fast it would make his head spin.

your son is getting off light.
 

Isis1

Senior Member
Are you even serious? I am not saying it is APPROPRIATE or that he should GET AWAY with it. But accusing him of Sexual Harassment is slightly harsh in my opinion. This is not a random girl in a hallway whos skirt he was tipping. This is his girlfriend of 2 years. He wasn't even doing it in a sexual way?! he isn't an attacker or a rapist?
The comment referring to the sexual misconduct happening in the hallways was meant to say there are kids making out in hallways, Calling girls sluts and whores, etc.
Was it appropriate?...no.
Is it sexual harrassment? .... in my opinion no.
Thankfully, the school thinks differently.
 

CdwJava

Senior Member
We are contacting an attorney. He will soon be off to college and does not need this on his record.

She is under the age of consent, however there are all kinds of sexually innapropriate activities happening in the school hallways. In my opinion, If both parties are consenting to the activities it shouldn't be considered sexual harassment rather inappropriate behavior? In the school handbook it does state this offense is in the same category as starting a fire or bringing a weapon to school.
Schools get sued for permitting this sort of horseplay so it is no surprise that they are taking such an open and public display is taken seriously.

Even if she did not complain about it, it does not mean that the scene was not both demeaning and humiliating. The dynamic of high school life - much as a domestic situation - is such that getting a "victim" to complain can be difficult.

You or the attorney can argue the definition of sexual harassment at his suspension hearing.
 

cbg

I'm a Northern Girl
The time to think about whether or not he can afford to have this on his record, is BEFORE he commits sexual harassment, not after.
 

cyjeff

Senior Member
But... it might get on Sonny's permanent record!!!!

Why shouldn't it?

Sometimes, people really baffle me. Sonny is playing Cap't Grabby Hands in a school hallway and does daddy worry about what he has taught Sonny about respecting women?

Nope.

He is worried that he will get a black mark on his record... because even though it involved picking up a girl's skirt to see her underwear, it really wasn't a SEXUAL attack.

I think I know where Sonny gets his ideas on how to treat women.
 

cyjeff

Senior Member
OP is Mommy.
Oh holy mother of God.

That is SO much worse.

So, Mom, what say we go down to the mall and I jerk up your skirt to see whatcha got underneath?

What? That would be humiliating and a sexually inappropriate gesture? You would want to call a cop and have me arrested to teach me I should keep my hands to myself?

There ya go.
 

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