Still confused on what to do out of control teen

[blueinfl]

What is the name of your state? FL

My 15 year old daughter is just out of control. Has no conscious, no feelings of remorse, no understanding of long term consequences, has violent outbursts, sounds like a mental illness right?- We've been in counseling but it is obviously not working.

She has run away, has become violent with me, verbally abusive to younger sibling (yes there is jealousy there), skips school, took my car without a license and totaled it (got wreckless driving, and driving without a license violations-still waiting on outcome of that) and has now run away again. I cut off phone and internet privileges in an attempt to minimize contact with certain friends.

I am responsible for this child and accept full responsibility but just not sure what to do. I also have to protect my younger child and family structure that she is destroying. I also want to help her but conventional methods do not work. Can not afford boot camps/schools-so conflicted and don't know what to do next to protect my family.

 

[Ohiogal]

Have you tried getting her inpatient psychiatric care? Calling the police on her when she gets violent with you or anyone else in the household and having her put in the juvenile system where they will provide her with treatment if you can't.

 

[blueinfl]

The violence only ocurred once and I did not report to the police - now I wish I had - maybe getting help would be easier. The police are unable to help since at this time she is just a runaway. I am concerned about getting in trouble for truancy - is there something I should be doing there as well?

I have to tell you - where I reside in FL the medical - and now come to find out mental health care-is irresponsible. Not a single psychologist nor psychiatrist office has called me back - I will be working with the Youth Crisis Center in an effort of getting her help.

Thanks - any advice on the truancy?

 

[Silverplum]

Parent Effectiveness Training (book). Look for it online. It's a few years old, but FANTASTIC. You can probably find it on Amazon. I cannot recommend it enough.

 

[lealea1005]

You state you've been in counselling. Have you notified her counselor about the situation? Perhaps he/she can help with information/suggestions for an inpatient diagnostic unit or qualified (board certified in child/adolescent psych) psychiatrist on an outpatient basis.

Your daughter defiance, self esteem & impulsive behavior issues are probably just as frustrating to her as they are to you. They may be caused by a chemical imabalance she has little control over. Don't give up. There is help for her (and you) out there. I'm not sure which area of Florida you're in but Jackson Memorial Medical Center is a teaching hospital in Miami with an excellent Child Psych residency program. Try contacting them for information about their treatment programs.

Getting involved with a youth crisis center is a good start. Truancy may be handled on a county level, not state. You may want to contact your local school administration offices for information regarding truancy.

Best of luck to you.

BTW.... That book Sugarplum suggested is great.

 

[Silverplum]

BTW.... That book Sugarplum suggested is great.

It's truly superior! Thanks for the backup.

It IS on Amazon (I just ordered 6 copies -- we give 'em away like candy!). The author is Thomas Gordon. It's also called "P.E.T." which is, of course, the acronym.

 

[smutlydog]

What is the name of your state? FL

My 15 year old daughter is just out of control. Has no conscious, no feelings of remorse, no understanding of long term consequences, has violent outbursts, sounds like a mental illness right?- We've been in counseling but it is obviously not working.

She has run away, has become violent with me, verbally abusive to younger sibling (yes there is jealousy there), skips school, took my car without a license and totaled it (got wreckless driving, and driving without a license violations-still waiting on outcome of that) and has now run away again. I cut off phone and internet privileges in an attempt to minimize contact with certain friends.

I am responsible for this child and accept full responsibility but just not sure what to do. I also have to protect my younger child and family structure that she is destroying. I also want to help her but conventional methods do not work. Can not afford boot camps/schools-so conflicted and don't know what to do next to protect my family.

How has her behavior been over the years? How about her level academic achievement from first grade to now?
It could be a conduct disorder but more information is needed