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Violating restraining order

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sloane

Junior Member
Hi all,

Its the crazy mom again. Here is an update on our case as we are going to a jury trial tomorrow.

She has accused my son of violating the RO three times. Two out of the three times, it never made it to court because the clerk looked over everything and it was clear my son was not where she said he was.

But here is the big one. This one never went before the clerk. It went straight to the judge.

What I dont get, this is the easiest one to prove he wasn't there as we have eye witnesses that he was in a specific place at the time of this alleged sighting.

The girl was with a group of people and not ONE of them are on the witness list. Kind of weird if you ask me.

I am really nervous as I have to be a witness as my son was with me all day. We do have an affidavit from the waitress who remembered us and she is coming to court to be a witness. (We have the pay stub and bank statements) But when I get nervous,I might something that will damage him.

I have no idea why this girls mother is making her daughter go through this. We weren't there. They have the proof, but she wont let it ago.

We saw all the evidence they have (disclosure) and they have nothing. but yet here I am panicking because when people hear RO, they think horrible things. (my son wrote a threatening text when they were breaking up and then the girl lied and lied of all this other stuff she claims that my son did and thats how she got a RO) We were instructed to just agree and not bother with it, just dont go near her. And thats exactly what he did until she kept calling the police stating she saw him here and there.

They are both Juveniles.

Is there any possible way the DA has some secrets under her sleeve to trip me up? I just dont understand why its gotten this far.

they also have the police on the witness list. The police stated they went to the call but could not find my son anywhere. Its on their report.
Why wouldn't they just call me and I would have let them talk to him? I just dont get it.

NO ONE, I mean NO ONE, never questioned him. is this normal? I think I watch too many cop shows where they bring the perp in the station and ask him questions.

No one investigated this case, they just believed her and now we are going before a jury. A group of strangers who will decide what happens to my son.

Anyone have any ideas?

I debated to even come back here from the way I was treated by some of you, but some were really very helpful so I thought I would just give it another try.
 


Just Blue

Senior Member
Hi all,

Its the crazy mom again. Here is an update on our case as we are going to a jury trial tomorrow.

She has accused my son of violating the RO three times. Two out of the three times, it never made it to court because the clerk looked over everything and it was clear my son was not where she said he was.

But here is the big one. This one never went before the clerk. It went straight to the judge.

What I dont get, this is the easiest one to prove he wasn't there as we have eye witnesses that he was in a specific place at the time of this alleged sighting.

The girl was with a group of people and not ONE of them are on the witness list. Kind of weird if you ask me.

I am really nervous as I have to be a witness as my son was with me all day. We do have an affidavit from the waitress who remembered us and she is coming to court to be a witness. (We have the pay stub and bank statements) But when I get nervous,I might something that will damage him.

I have no idea why this girls mother is making her daughter go through this. We weren't there. They have the proof, but she wont let it ago.

We saw all the evidence they have (disclosure) and they have nothing. but yet here I am panicking because when people hear RO, they think horrible things. (my son wrote a threatening text when they were breaking up and then the girl lied and lied of all this other stuff she claims that my son did and thats how she got a RO) We were instructed to just agree and not bother with it, just dont go near her. And thats exactly what he did until she kept calling the police stating she saw him here and there.

They are both Juveniles.

Is there any possible way the DA has some secrets under her sleeve to trip me up? I just dont understand why its gotten this far.

they also have the police on the witness list. The police stated they went to the call but could not find my son anywhere. Its on their report.
Why wouldn't they just call me and I would have let them talk to him? I just dont get it.

NO ONE, I mean NO ONE, never questioned him. is this normal? I think I watch too many cop shows where they bring the perp in the station and ask him questions.

No one investigated this case, they just believed her and now we are going before a jury. A group of strangers who will decide what happens to my son.

Anyone have any ideas?

I debated to even come back here from the way I was treated by some of you, but some were really very helpful so I thought I would just give it another try.
US Law Only.
 

HighwayMan

Super Secret Senior Member
Hi all,

Its the crazy mom again. Here is an update on our case...

Do you think most of us remember who you are? If you already have an open thread why don't you just update it instead of starting from scratch and causing confusion?
 

quincy

Senior Member
... Here is an update on our case as we are going to a jury trial tomorrow ...
First, for the benefit of others, sloane's state is Massachusetts. sloane's previous thread: https://forum.freeadvice.com/juvenile-law-90/attorny-fees-616758.html

sloane, if the trial is tomorrow, here are some tips for court:

1. You and your son should dress nicely for court ("church" clothes, no tee shirts or baseball caps or low-riding pants).
2. You and your son should tell the truth, simply and plainly. Make no unnecessary embellishments or false statements.
3. You and your son should only address the judge, and speak only when it is your turn to speak.
4. Do not speak to, argue with, or interrupt the other party to the case, regardless of any nonsense they might spout.
5. At all times you and your son should be polite to everyone, including the other party.
6. Smell nice. Do not smell of smoke or heavy cologne or body odor.
7. No cell phones. Judges hate when a cell phone rings in his courtroom.
8. Try not to be too nervous. A courtroom can be an intimidating place but judges are generally nice and tolerant of those in the unfortunate position of being before him.
9. Your son should prepare by taking to court all of his evidence and all of his witnesses. Written testimony from the waitress may or may not be accepted.

The judge will be "judging" how all of you interact with each other, to decide if the restraining order should be lifted or remain in place and to decide if, based on what is presented, your son violated the order. Show respect to the judge and respect to the court and tell the truth and you and your son will do as well as it is possible for you to do.

If your son has a chance to see an attorney before court, however, perhaps the attorney can accompany him to the trial. That would be a good thing.

Good luck.
 

sloane

Junior Member
First, for the benefit of others, sloane's state is Massachusetts. sloane's previous thread: https://forum.freeadvice.com/juvenile-law-90/attorny-fees-616758.html

sloane, if the trial is tomorrow, here are some tips for court:

1. You and your son should dress nicely for court ("church" clothes, no tee shirts or baseball caps or low-riding pants).
2. You and your son should tell the truth, simply and plainly. Make no unnecessary embellishments or false statements.
3. You and your son should only address the judge, and speak only when it is your turn to speak.
4. Do not speak to, argue with, or interrupt the other party to the case, regardless of any nonsense they might spout.
5. At all times you and your son should be polite to everyone, including the other party.
6. Smell nice. Do not smell of smoke or heavy cologne or body odor.
7. No cell phones. Judges hate when a cell phone rings in his courtroom.
8. Try not to be too nervous. A courtroom can be an intimidating place but judges are generally nice and tolerant of those in the unfortunate position of being before him.
9. Your son should prepare by taking to court all of his evidence and all of his witnesses. Written testimony from the waitress may or may not be accepted.

The judge will be "judging" how all of you interact with each other, to decide if the restraining order should be lifted or remain in place and to decide if, based on what is presented, your son violated the order. Show respect to the judge and respect to the court and tell the truth and you and your son will do as well as it is possible for you to do.

If your son has a chance to see an attorney before court, however, perhaps the attorney can accompany him to the trial. That would be a good thing.

Good luck.
Thank you quincy, you were very helpful before.

My son is very respectful and we always dress very nice. He wears a suit. My son will not be testifying. HGe siad its the DA's job to prove he was there, and they cant.

Thanks for the advice, my lawyer said pretty much the same thing. The waitress is actually supenaed to testify and she will be there. I am hoping that the judge will let her speak as she remembers him and the concerssation that we had.

The RO will be up in May. WE hope that they wont extend it. This case is supposed to be strictkly if my son was where the 'victim' said he was. Which he wasnt.

I am so nervous I couldnt sleep.
 

sloane

Junior Member
I realized I never gave an update.

Court went well. We had our witnesses. The girl kept answering questions from her laywer and our lawyer with 'I dont know'. I actually felt bad for her, because it was clear that she was struggling. The judge then went down everything she said and dismissed the case due to her testimony not making any sense.

So we are now up to 6 allegations that she reported of my son who violated the RO. All 6, they had no proof, two in front of the clerk magistrate and one in, the most recent one, in front of jury but then went to a bench trial.

So the year is almost up. He turned 18 last month. So after this one, we all just breathed. My son has lost so much weight, has not slept in a long time, and has been glued to my side for fear that she may report him again. He actually slept for 12 hours that night.

Well, its finally Over.

Or so we thought.

We got a call from the police asking if they can speak to my son. I asked in regards to what. They said due to that he is 18 now, they need to talk to him. I told them that he was at his girlfriends house and then they said if I can bring him down to the station so they can ask him some questions, its not an emergency.

I told them I will be contacting our lawyer and then we will come down.

Then the cop said "was your son in school on such and such a day?" I told them that he was. And the cop said "ok, if you can bring him down next week sometime, that would be great"

I am assuming the cops are tired of this, but they need to investigate.

But he is 18 now and things change. The RO is almost up and I have this weird feeling they will be asking for an extension of the RO.

I am so tired. I have no idea why they keep doing this. She just wont let it go.

I am at a point now that I want to turn the table and sue for harassment. My son has missed a lot of school with going to court and dealing with all of this.

I really thought it was over.

So here are my questions.
1. what is the likely hood that they will be allowed an extension or a life time RO after all of this?
2. does my son have any rights at all?
3. can we sue for harassment at this point?
4. should we call DCF and file an abuse case. (the mother has her own issues, and I personally feel this is more of the mother then the daughter pulling the strings)

thoughts?
 

quincy

Senior Member
I realized I never gave an update.

Court went well. We had our witnesses. The girl kept answering questions from her laywer and our lawyer with 'I dont know'. I actually felt bad for her, because it was clear that she was struggling. The judge then went down everything she said and dismissed the case due to her testimony not making any sense.

So we are now up to 6 allegations that she reported of my son who violated the RO. All 6, they had no proof, two in front of the clerk magistrate and one in, the most recent one, in front of jury but then went to a bench trial.

So the year is almost up. He turned 18 last month. So after this one, we all just breathed. My son has lost so much weight, has not slept in a long time, and has been glued to my side for fear that she may report him again. He actually slept for 12 hours that night.

Well, its finally Over.

Or so we thought.

We got a call from the police asking if they can speak to my son. I asked in regards to what. They said due to that he is 18 now, they need to talk to him. I told them that he was at his girlfriends house and then they said if I can bring him down to the station so they can ask him some questions, its not an emergency.

I told them I will be contacting our lawyer and then we will come down.

Then the cop said "was your son in school on such and such a day?" I told them that he was. And the cop said "ok, if you can bring him down next week sometime, that would be great"

I am assuming the cops are tired of this, but they need to investigate.

But he is 18 now and things change. The RO is almost up and I have this weird feeling they will be asking for an extension of the RO.

I am so tired. I have no idea why they keep doing this. She just wont let it go.

I am at a point now that I want to turn the table and sue for harassment. My son has missed a lot of school with going to court and dealing with all of this.

I really thought it was over.

So here are my questions.
1. what is the likely hood that they will be allowed an extension or a life time RO after all of this?
2. does my son have any rights at all?
3. can we sue for harassment at this point?
4. should we call DCF and file an abuse case. (the mother has her own issues, and I personally feel this is more of the mother then the daughter pulling the strings)

thoughts?
I don't know what the likelihood is of an extension on the restraining order. I think your son needs to discuss this with his attorney and your son should also be asking the attorney what his options are now to stop the continued complaints by the girl. A good time to discuss the matter is before your son makes another trip to the police to answer questions.

Good luck to you and your son, sloane. Thank you for the update.
 

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