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Boyfriend wont get out

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S

soofrustrated

Guest
What is the name of your state? Virginia

My boyfreind lives with me and I told him that I dont want to be with him anymore and that I want him to move out. My name is on the lease, my landlord does not know that he is living with me. He REFUSES to leave, or to "let" me break up with him.
:mad:
I want him out of my life! How do I make him leave? He does not pay rent. The magistrate told me that I have to "evict" him, and to call the civil court, but when I called the clerk at the civil court she said she wasnt sure if the magistrate was right, and to seek legal advice!
Help!!!!!!!!!!!
 


JETX

Senior Member
Very tricky ground here.... the issue is 'assumed tenancy'. By your letting him live there, he COULD claim that he is a sub-tenant on your lease. If that is the case, then you would have to go through the entire legal process of eviction.

My suggestion, send him a certified letter (maybe at work) where you notify him that he is no longer a tenant and that he has 3 days to remove ALL of his belongings from the property. After that three days, then simply change the locks and give the landlord the new keys. If the boyfriend returns to get property that he forgot (or didn't move), then make sure the police are there to 'protect the peace'. They will NOT get involved in the civil issue of rights of tenancy, but will make sure that he gets his property.

Above all, remember that their are risks in the termination of this relationship and only you know what tendancies he might have. Protect yourself, even to the extent of finding alternate accomodations during the time that he is 'moving'. If you do this, make sure that you take a video of the property and condition BEFORE you go on your 'vacation'. Then, if he takes property that is not his, or damages your property, you will have it documented.

Be careful, and good luck.
 
S

soofrustrated

Guest
Thank you for responding so quickly! There are a few questions I have for you about what you said though.
I only have to give him a 3 day notice? Thats it? The clerk at the civil court suggested that I give a 30 day notice. I know he wont have his stuff out in 3 days, he really has no place to go (which is not what I'm concerned about, but still).
So if I give him notice, and he is still not out, I will have a problem with changing the locks on him, because he rarely leaves! He does not work (hes such a loser)!
And about his tendencies, I do have to be careful, because he has been violent in the past, which is why I went to the magistrate in the first place. I wanted to get a restraining order, but she said that VA does not issue them (unless he beats me up first I suppose!) I asked if I could have a police officer escort me home to be with me when I told him I want him out, just in case something happened, and she said no!
He has not been violent yet, he's just been telling me "I'm not going anywhere, and you cant make me leave!"
And I know that with an eviction the notice has to be either certified mail or served by a sheriff, is that still the case with this 3 day notice that I give him? I can not send it certified, because he does not receive mail at my house, it still goes to his parent house.
Thank you!
 

JETX

Senior Member
Q1) "I only have to give him a 3 day notice? Thats it? The clerk at the civil court suggested that I give a 30 day notice. I know he wont have his stuff out in 3 days, he really has no place to go (which is not what I'm concerned about, but still)."
A1) If you will re-read my post, I said, "he COULD claim that he is a sub-tenant on your lease. If that is the case, then you would have to go through the entire legal process of eviction." And if he does that, then you will be required to give him the full 30 days. Also, due to your allowing him to become a 'tenant', you have caused yourself a lot of potential problems. I only SUGGESTED that you try the 'abbreviated' version to see if he falls for it. If not, or if he exerts his 'tenancy rights', then you are back to the full 30 day notice.

Q2) "So if I give him notice, and he is still not out, I will have a problem with changing the locks on him, because he rarely leaves! He does not work (hes such a loser)! "
A2) So, send him out for candles and wine with a promise of an interesting evening!!! Every guy falls for that one!

Q3) "And I know that with an eviction the notice has to be either certified mail or served by a sheriff, is that still the case with this 3 day notice that I give him? I can not send it certified, because he does not receive mail at my house, it still goes to his parent house"
A3) So, send it to his parents.... send it certified (RRR). Be creative. Use a return address like, "Regional AIDS clinic. PERSONAL. TO BE OPENED BY ADDRESSEE ONLY". Then, when his parents get the letter, they will immediately call him and he will run over there to get the letter. While he is gone, change the locks!!!
 

Ladynred

Senior Member
I just LOVE the way Halket thinks :D


If the "AIDS" letter or candles won't work.. is he into sports ?? How about giving him or sending him tickets to a sports event that 'll get him out of the house for a few hours ? That letter could be a "PRIZE WINNER" with the tix in it ;) Another avenue *I'd* try would be his buddies.. maybe you could convince THEM to get him out of the house... get him shi*tfaced or something.. lol.

On a more somber note, this jerk doesn't sound like a real bright bulb or he wouldnt' be mooching off of you and jobless. He may not have ANY clue that he could claim 'assumed tenancy'.. he's just being a jerk because he'd lose his free ride and lodgings.
 
S

soofrustrated

Guest
Well, it only costs $12 to have it delivered to him, so I will have that done rather than certified mail to his mothers house.

I will go ahead and give him the 30 days, rather than do anything shorter and have him find out that its not "legal" or whatever. He already thinks that I "can't" kick him out, he thinks that there is no way that I can do it. I guess he's pretty stupid.

Yes, he wants his "free ride" but we also have a daughter, and that is his reason for refusing to leave, but I told him: "Your mom and dad are divorced and so are mine, people break up/divorce every day...why are you trying to make me miserable?"

He just doesn't get it!
 
S

soofrustrated

Guest
One more thing...

Can anyone give me a sample eviction notice? I need to know exactly what to say, I'm afraid I'll leave something out!

Thanks!
 

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