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35 year old woman targeting my 13 year old daughter

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lynneh4136

Junior Member
I live in PA. My daughter is having problems with a 35 year old mother saying negative things about her. This has been going on for about 2 years. It started as an attitude kind of thing then progressed on to this woman approaching our daughter and saying something to her. At that point my husband and I contacted her and demanded that she cease. Things seemed to quiet down for awhile until recently.

Both of our daughters are in an activity together that requires a lot of time spent together although they are not friends. For some reason over the last month or so it has been brought to our attention that the following has been going on.

1. Talking about my daughter to others that come to their home: calling her fat etc.
2. Calling other parents to let them know their children should not be around mine because she is not a good girl.
3. Telling others that my daughter sucks at her activity and claiming that "see how much better my daughter is".
4. Pulled up in front of our home when my daughter had friends over so that she could make a point of saying hello to all but my daughter.

I understand that I can not control what is said in their home, however this isn't a case of a 13 year old girl fight. This is an adult doing this and it seems to be escalating, she had not been to our home for 2 years and then waited until I ran to the store to pull up out front. I know that this woman suffers from anxiety issues and has lost a job because of it, but how much more of this behavior should we tolerate? What are my options as a parent?
 


Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
I live in PA. My daughter is having problems with a 35 year old mother saying negative things about her. This has been going on for about 2 years. It started as an attitude kind of thing then progressed on to this woman approaching our daughter and saying something to her. At that point my husband and I contacted her and demanded that she cease. Things seemed to quiet down for awhile until recently.

Both of our daughters are in an activity together that requires a lot of time spent together although they are not friends. For some reason over the last month or so it has been brought to our attention that the following has been going on.

1. Talking about my daughter to others that come to their home: calling her fat etc.
2. Calling other parents to let them know their children should not be around mine because she is not a good girl.
3. Telling others that my daughter sucks at her activity and claiming that "see how much better my daughter is".
4. Pulled up in front of our home when my daughter had friends over so that she could make a point of saying hello to all but my daughter.

I understand that I can not control what is said in their home, however this isn't a case of a 13 year old girl fight. This is an adult doing this and it seems to be escalating, she had not been to our home for 2 years and then waited until I ran to the store to pull up out front. I know that this woman suffers from anxiety issues and has lost a job because of it, but how much more of this behavior should we tolerate? What are my options as a parent?
Maybe you need to find her a different activity to participate in...
 

HomeGuru

Senior Member
.

Both of our daughters are in an activity together that requires a lot of time spent together although they are not friends.



**A: please specify what type of activity you are talking about and state whether such activity is part of a school function or not.
 

lynneh4136

Junior Member
Finding her a different activity is not an option my daughter is a competition dancer for a local dance studio, no it is not school related.
 

dlw99

Member
Your daughter is being bullied. Your state is working on anti-bullying legislation within the schools, but that won't help you with the mean mother.

Mean Mom, for whatever reason, is jealous of you and/or your daughter. She might be trying to mess with you by hurting your child. Have you had any run-ins with this woman?

From what you've described, MM has not broken any laws. Sit down with your daughter and make sure she knows that you are aware of the escalating hostilites, and ask her to relay any and all incidents with the woman. The most important thing is that neither you or your child internalize any of MM's words or actions. She sounds like an ass. No response is probably the best response for the time being.
 

lynneh4136

Junior Member
Thank you for your responses my husband, daughter and I are trying to take the high road as hard as that is. If it goes any further we will do the cease and desist letter with our lawyer.
 

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