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Blackmail with video/pics that I didn't know where taken

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LeeLou

Junior Member
Hi,
I have a question. A guy that lives in my neighborhood is trying to blackmail me into having sex with him. We hungout a long time ago and he can't get over it. He claims that he took videos and pictures without my knowledge and is going to show and send them to everyone I know around here and try and ruin my life for not hanging out with him. This has been going on for a long time. I have tried ignoring him. Have blocked him multiple times just for him to make new numbers and message me. He has even made numbers pretending to be other people to get info to blackmail me with. After the first time we hungout I knew he had issues and didn't want to see him again. He had blackmailed me into seeing him and sleeping with him multiple times and I can't take it anymore. It stopped for awhile and he is back now bothering me. He drives past my house even and texts and says you're not home when my car isn't there. We never dated or anything. He claims he has to drive past to get to his house but it's actually out of the way for him and creepy. Is there anything I can do? Would you suggest going to the local police since we live in the same township? Any help would be appreciated. Thanks!
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
Hi,
I have a question. A guy that lives in my neighborhood is trying to blackmail me into having sex with him. We hungout a long time ago and he can't get over it. He claims that he took videos and pictures without my knowledge and is going to show and send them to everyone I know around here and try and ruin my life for not hanging out with him. This has been going on for a long time. I have tried ignoring him. Have blocked him multiple times just for him to make new numbers and message me. He has even made numbers pretending to be other people to get info to blackmail me with. After the first time we hungout I knew he had issues and didn't want to see him again. He had blackmailed me into seeing him and sleeping with him multiple times and I can't take it anymore. It stopped for awhile and he is back now bothering me. He drives past my house even and texts and says you're not home when my car isn't there. We never dated or anything. He claims he has to drive past to get to his house but it's actually out of the way for him and creepy. Is there anything I can do? Would you suggest going to the local police since we live in the same township? Any help would be appreciated. Thanks!
Yes, report him to the police. Soon.
 

quincy

Senior Member
Hi,
I have a question. A guy that lives in my neighborhood is trying to blackmail me into having sex with him. We hungout a long time ago and he can't get over it. He claims that he took videos and pictures without my knowledge and is going to show and send them to everyone I know around here and try and ruin my life for not hanging out with him. This has been going on for a long time. I have tried ignoring him. Have blocked him multiple times just for him to make new numbers and message me. He has even made numbers pretending to be other people to get info to blackmail me with. After the first time we hungout I knew he had issues and didn't want to see him again. He had blackmailed me into seeing him and sleeping with him multiple times and I can't take it anymore. It stopped for awhile and he is back now bothering me. He drives past my house even and texts and says you're not home when my car isn't there. We never dated or anything. He claims he has to drive past to get to his house but it's actually out of the way for him and creepy. Is there anything I can do? Would you suggest going to the local police since we live in the same township? Any help would be appreciated. Thanks!
What is the name of your state, LeeLou?

If he is making threats to expose private videos and pictures (whether the videos and photos exist or not), you can make a report to the police. Without your knowledge or consent, videotaping and/or taking photos of you in a place when you have an expectation of privacy (bedrooms, bathrooms) is illegal in all states. There is little you can do other than report his threats, however, without video and photo evidence. He could be all bluff.

If you are afraid for your safety (and this guy does sound creepy), you should call the police. Obtaining a restraining order could make sense (although restraining orders against crazy people can have an effect opposite of what was hoped for).

But whatever you do, I strongly recommend you do not continue to see the fellow or, especially, sleep with the fellow. By doing that, you are working to encourage his behavior.

This is not a defamation matter, by the way, but could be an invasion of privacy matter if he actually took videos or photos and makes them public (not to mention a criminal matter if the videos/photos are of a sexual nature).

Good luck.
 

LeeLou

Junior Member
Thanks. The state is Pennsylvania. Yeah he claimed he took them in his living room because he knew I wouldn't want to see him anymore. He also keeps threatening me by saying he's going to talk to everyone he knows at the bar by my house and show them texts and talk crap on me that isn't true. So basically he secretly took the pics for the purpose of blackmailing me into coming back. I have told him it's not happening and he's now on phone number 17 since this started. He has to have an app or something to make fake numbers. I'm just wondering what the police could do or if they would do anything. I'm not sure how that stuff works. Would they contact him? Or keep a file or something?
 

quincy

Senior Member
Thanks. The state is Pennsylvania. Yeah he claimed he took them in his living room because he knew I wouldn't want to see him anymore. He also keeps threatening me by saying he's going to talk to everyone he knows at the bar by my house and show them texts and talk crap on me that isn't true. So basically he secretly took the pics for the purpose of blackmailing me into coming back. I have told him it's not happening and he's now on phone number 17 since this started. He has to have an app or something to make fake numbers. I'm just wondering what the police could do or if they would do anything. I'm not sure how that stuff works. Would they contact him? Or keep a file or something?
If you make a report to the police, the police will investigate your complaint. In investigating, yes, they will probably contact him. In fact, that could be the first action they will take. They would probably tell him to knock off the phone calls and texts because you are not happy with the contact. And the police might suggest to you that you think about seeking a restraining order to halt the harassment.

There are other actions you can take - and certainly additional legal actions if he publishes any private sexually-oriented material about you or threatens violence (of if you fear for your safety) - but the best action appears to be contacting the police to see if a visit from them will put a stop to the harassment. And a report to the police will put the fellow on the police "radar" and any police report you make can be used later if needed to help support the need for a restraining order.

Again, though, restraining orders are not magic bullets that will automatically stop harassing conduct, nor are restraining orders safety vests that will protect you from the crazy actions of a crazy person. What having a restraining order will DO, however, is allow for the police to arrest the guy if he violates any of the conditions of the order (e.g., calls you again or comes within X number of feet of you).

Good luck.
 

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