Please PLEAAASSEEE Help

[canyouhelpme213]

I live in Arizona and I don't know what to do, so I am hoping for some help. Some legal advice, or options of what I can do to end this stress.

I am being stalked online, cyber bullied, my name is being slandered with lies and this has gone on for several years now. They create fake FB profiles of me with lies and altered pictures. They even post pictures of themselves as the background of these FB accounts, flipping me off. They have stalked my friends and family to spread lies about me, and even kept me from getting a job because of the slander. I HAVE NOT responded to their childish actions. I save everything they do (for future proof) and just report the fake profiles in hopes that they will be taken down. I do not contact them, bash them, or even give into their childish BS because I am hoping the only response they will get out of me is a slap in the face with a charge of some sort. So their public records will state how crazy they both are.

I am a single mom so I don't have a lot of money to hire an attorney that can help me and I fear that a restraing order wont help, given I don't have their address to serve them. I don't know what to do.

Please help Its been going on for 7 years!!!

 

[quincy]

I live in Arizona and I don't know what to do, so I am hoping for some help. Some legal advice, or options of what I can do to end this stress.

I am being stalked online, cyber bullied, my name is being slandered with lies and this has gone on for several years now. They create fake FB profiles of me with lies and altered pictures. They even post pictures of themselves as the background of these FB accounts, flipping me off. They have stalked my friends and family to spread lies about me, and even kept me from getting a job because of the slander. I HAVE NOT responded to their childish actions. I save everything they do (for future proof) and just report the fake profiles in hopes that they will be taken down. I do not contact them, bash them, or even give into their childish BS because I am hoping the only response they will get out of me is a slap in the face with a charge of some sort. So their public records will state how crazy they both are.

I am a single mom so I don't have a lot of money to hire an attorney that can help me and I fear that a restraing order wont help, given I don't have their address to serve them. I don't know what to do.

Please help Its been going on for 7 years!!!

What sort of lies are these two people spreading about you (exact words, leaving out any personal identifying information)?

Do they know you in real life or only from online forums/Facebook/chat rooms?

If you know these people in real life, do you have any idea WHY they would be creating fake profiles about you, altering photos, cyberbullying, stalking you and telling lies about you?

Do you have proof that you lost a job due to falsehoods they posted about you online?

If you can provide answers to these questions, I can better determine if you have any legal civil action worth the very high cost of pursuing and/or what sort of criminal actions might be possible to pursue. The fact that you say this has been going on for seven years may limit what is available in the way of legal action.

 

[adjusterjack]

I don't know what to do.

Please help Its been going on for 7 years!!!

Did getting the hell off facebook and staying off facebook ever occur to you?

 

[quincy]

Did getting the hell off facebook and staying off facebook ever occur to you?

Facts really matter with online defamation. There have been people defamed online who have written articles, or who have posted comments to news articles, or who simply have a Linked In profile.

In other words, not everyone who has crazy followers online do anything wrong - nor should they have to limit their activities online because some crazy has decided to play games with their reputation.

 

[canyouhelpme213]

What sort of lies are these two people spreading about you (exact words, leaving out any personal identifying information)?

Do they know you in real life or only from online forums/Facebook/chat rooms?

If you know these people in real life, do you have any idea WHY they would be creating fake profiles about you, altering photos, cyberbullying, stalking you and telling lies about you?

Do you have proof that you lost a job due to falsehoods they posted about you online?

If you can provide answers to these questions, I can better determine if you have any legal civil action worth the very high cost of pursuing and/or what sort of criminal actions might be possible to pursue. The fact that you say this has been going on for seven years may limit what is available in the way of legal action.

Well they call me pretty much anything negative they can think of; whore, trash, saying my kids belong to different guys (which is false) so they titling me as an Octomom. Also anything negative they find on me like a traffic ticket they post to their profiles saying Im trash.

No. They do not know me. Never met me. Long story short....One is the ex of my fiance who I have been with for 8 years and she lives in Oklahoma and the other girl is the ex of my best friend who lives in California. Again I have NEVER trashed talked them or even responded to their childish actions so I have no clue as to why they are doing all of this other than just pure jealousy. I would think by now they would give up since they are not getting a reaction out of me!! I found out that I am not the only one they have done this to either. They have gone as far as posed as a lawyer just to try and get this one girl fired from her job. Insane.

Since 2012 I haven't been on any social media sites whatsoever because I got tired of them...So now they stalk my family and friends for recent pics of me to trash. So my family and friends send me the link to whatever these girls created and I snap a pic with my phone to hopefully use as proof against them. Their recent fake FB profile is of me with all these lies posted on it, and one of the girls as the background cover photo flipping it off by kissing her middle finger.

I have anxiety and have become depressed over all this. I keep hoping by just not responding to them they would eventually give up, but they haven't. If I was engaging in their childish behavior I can see why they would keep it up and want to bash me back...but I don't! I just want it to end but it doesn't seem like its ever going to.

 

[canyouhelpme213]

Did getting the hell off facebook and staying off facebook ever occur to you?

I have. It doesn't help. They just stalk someone else I know to create something else.

 

[quincy]

Well they call me pretty much anything negative they can think of; whore, trash, saying my kids belong to different guys (which is false) so they titling me as an Octomom. Also anything negative they find on me like a traffic ticket they post to their profiles saying Im trash.

Okay. Statements like these are definitely not nice, and it is also not nice to publish online someone else's traffic tickets. But the types of comments being leveled against you would most likely be looked at as opinion or rhetorical hyperbole. What is posted is not meant to be taken seriously and what is posted is not taken seriously.

That said, there HAVE been cases where stating or implying someone is a whore has been enough for a successful defamation suit. With defamation claims, there are several factors to consider. Although I don't see that you have quite enough to make pursuing defamation claims against your out-of-state harassers worth the expense, and I think that some of the necessary elements for a successful claim might be missing from what you have reported in your posts, if these postings have caused you distress for 7 years, having everything reviewed by an attorney in your area is an option.

No. They do not know me. Never met me. Long story short....One is the ex of my fiance who I have been with for 8 years and she lives in Oklahoma and the other girl is the ex of my best friend who lives in California. Again I have NEVER trashed talked them or even responded to their childish actions so I have no clue as to why they are doing all of this other than just pure jealousy. I would think by now they would give up since they are not getting a reaction out of me!! I found out that I am not the only one they have done this to either. They have gone as far as posed as a lawyer just to try and get this one girl fired from her job. Insane.

What is being posted is definitely childish. It would take the rare person who would believe what has been posted. Unless you have suffered economic harm (lost a job as a direct result of the comments, lost a job opportunity, missed work for medical reasons related to the postings), your instinct to ignore the harassers is probably best.

Since 2012 I haven't been on any social media sites whatsoever because I got tired of them...So now they stalk my family and friends for recent pics of me to trash. So my family and friends send me the link to whatever these girls created and I snap a pic with my phone to hopefully use as proof against them. Their recent fake FB profile is of me with all these lies posted on it, and one of the girls as the background cover photo flipping it off by kissing her middle finger.

Again, this reflects more poorly on the women who are creating the posts than it does on you. Defamatory, probably not. Annoying, yes.

I have anxiety and have become depressed over all this. I keep hoping by just not responding to them they would eventually give up, but they haven't. If I was engaging in their childish behavior I can see why they would keep it up and want to bash me back...but I don't! I just want it to end but it doesn't seem like its ever going to.

You can attempt to find out the current addresses of these women (this shouldn't be hard if you know who they are) and then you could have an attorney in your area send these women cease and desist letters, advising them to stop posting about you or legal action might be considered.

You can have the attorney personally review what has been posted about you, and he can review with you what is required for a stalking, cyberbullying or impersonation complaint to be taken seriously by law enforcement in these women's states.

I am not seeing offhand any legal action that can be easily supported by what you have related here, but perhaps a letter from the attorney to the women is all it will take to have them stop their online attacks.

Good luck.

 

[canyouhelpme213]

Okay. Statements like these are definitely not nice, and it is also not nice to publish online someone else's traffic tickets. But the types of comments being leveled against you would most likely be looked at as opinion or rhetorical hyperbole. What is posted is not meant to be taken seriously and what is posted is not taken seriously.

That said, there HAVE been cases where stating or implying someone is a whore has been enough for a successful defamation suit. With defamation claims, there are several factors to consider. Although I don't see that you have quite enough to make pursuing defamation claims against your out-of-state harassers worth the expense, and I think that some of the necessary elements for a successful claim might be missing from what you have reported in your posts, if these postings have caused you distress for 7 years, having everything reviewed by an attorney in your area is an option.



What is being posted is definitely childish. It would take the rare person who would believe what has been posted. Unless you have suffered economic harm (lost a job as a direct result of the comments, lost a job opportunity, missed work for medical reasons related to the postings), your instinct to ignore the harassers is probably best.



Again, this reflects more poorly on the women who are creating the posts than it does on you. Defamatory, probably not. Annoying, yes.



You can attempt to find out the current addresses of these women (this shouldn't be hard if you know who they are) and then you could have an attorney in your area send these women cease and desist letters, advising them to stop posting about you or legal action might be considered.

You can have the attorney personally review what has been posted about you, and he can review with you what is required for a stalking, cyberbullying or impersonation complaint to be taken seriously by law enforcement in these women's states.

I am not seeing offhand any legal action that can be easily supported by what you have related here, but perhaps a letter from the attorney to the women is all it will take to have them stop their online attacks.

Good luck.

I wish there was more I could do to MAKE them stop than just a letter. But if thats my only option after several years of this, then hopefully that will help. Thank you for responding and giving me some advice.

 

[adjusterjack]

I wish there was more I could do to MAKE them stop than just a letter. But if thats my only option after several years of this, then hopefully that will help. Thank you for responding and giving me some advice.

You might also look into taking out restraining orders against them for harassment in the states where they are located. Many states allow that. When they start violating restraining orders they can be subject to arrest.

You'll have to locate them to have them served if you do that.

 

[quincy]

I wish there was more I could do to MAKE them stop than just a letter. But if thats my only option after several years of this, then hopefully that will help. Thank you for responding and giving me some advice.

I am not seeing many other options, canyouhelpme, but a personal review of all that has been posted about you could lead to a different assessment.

There was a mention made of obtaining a restraining order. Although there are harassment laws and computer crime laws, I think you would have difficulty getting a court to issue a restraining order against someone in a different state who is making derogatory comments about you online. Speech cannot be restrained. It will be the acts that can be restrained. And, although this is fact and state dependent, courts on the whole have tended to not consider computer contact the type of personal contact that would violate a restraining order.

If you knew the individuals personally and there was a personal relationship between you and these women, and if there were threats of violence being made against you that could reasonably be carried out by them, then it might be a more realistic option. But, of course, it is always something to ask your attorney about when s/he reviews the online material.

Here is a link to an (older) American Bar Association chart with Stalking/Harassment laws around the country (some have been revised in recent years): http://www.americanbar.org/content/dam/aba/migrated/domviol/docs/StalkingHarassmentCPOChartJune07.authcheckdam.pdf

Again, canyouhelpme, I can understand how this has caused you distress. I have been one of many on this forum who have had their own online "stalker" and harasser and, while the typical harasser will give up when they receive no reaction, there are always those few who have nothing in their lives to make them feel positive about themselves so they try to feel greater by bringing down others. Some people have nothing better to do with their lives, in other words, than to play with reputations on the internet. If the reputational harm is great enough, a defamation claim (although expensive) can make sense. I do not see that one makes financial sense for you.

 

[quincy]

Here, as a bit of an aside and included only because I mentioned cases where the word "whore" formed the basis of the defamation suit, is just one of the cases. This case out of Rhode Island (1995) is interesting because the trial justice determined the word whore, as defined by Black's Law Dictionary, was true as it was applied to the plaintiff (but it was said with malice).

Johnson v. Johnson, 645 A.2d 1212: http://law.justia.com/cases/rhode-island/supreme-court/1995/654-a-2d-1212.html