Adult Guardianship Needed..?

[Powerless]

What is the name of your state? Texas

My younger brother has lived with my wife and I for almost 6 yrs. He is 48 yrs. old and a non verbal autistic. My mother raised him for all his life until my step-dad died and she remarried. My new step father didn't get along very well with my little brother(or any of us kids) and vice versa. It was a very sad situation. My mother has some pretty stressful moments at times, she has mental problems and I've been told by her oldest sister that she was diagnosed as bi-polar. I mention this because about once or twice a year she suddenly decides she wants my brother to come back to live with them. He does NOT want this...at all. He gets frantic at the mere mention of it. I guess she feels guilty about the way things turned out and she does truly love my little brother. Although she also loves this man!
The social security check he gets monthly is made out to me, for him. We use it to pay for his needs. He has just been awarded a sizeable amount of money in a class action law suit that dealt with a medication that nealy cost him his life one night. It was a medication that put him in a zombie like state, which made him more tolerable to the new step father,which made my mom's life also easier. My question is this: Do I need to become his guardian? He really has very little concept of money. He doesn't know if he has 89 cents or 89 dollars. We live in a small rental house and would all love to use some of this money as a down payment on our own home. My wife had to quit her job to stay home to care for my brother when he came to stay with us. The loss of that second income had a hand in us never being quite able to scrape a down payment together. It would be a home that my wife and I would make payments on after he made the down payment. I'd also like to use some of the money to make arrangements for my brother's eventual resting place as well as a few things he's always wanted but none of us could ever afford. I've never wanted to be his guardian because I've heard that after he had a guardian the first time, he'd no longer have a voice in where he lived or who he lived with. Even though he can't speak he does have ways of letting us all know his wishes. I don't want to steal what little shred of independence he does have. I just don't know what to do about spending any of this money?!? We don't want to get into any trouble but at the same time we have needs wants and desires that my brother can now afford some of. I do NOT want to break the law or endanger my brother's money in any way. Can anyone help us with an answer?
Thanks So Much!What is the name of your state?

[ceara19]

It wasn't necessary for your wife to quit working in order to take care of your brother. He is receiving a social security check (I presume for his disability), which means he qualifies for home health care. The lawsuit settlement is meant to be used for his past, present and future care, NOT to buy a bigger home for you and your wife. If anything ever happened to you and/or your wife, or you simply decided that caring for him was too much t handle, he would no longer benefit from the home HIS money helped purchase.

You could TRY to be appointed his legal guardian, but under the circumstances, a court could easily decide it would be in your brother's best interest to name a neutral 3rd party as his guardian.

[Powerless]

We don't want a BIGGER home... we only want to OWN a home, as opposed to renting. He has no past or present debts as we pay for everything he needs and most of the things he wants IF we are able to afford it. And as far as home health care goes... my wife's job was gone before we ever got an answer to our questions about home health care. My brother needed someone to care for him that understands how to communicate with him. It's not just a matter of hiring just ANYBODY. We would NEVER EVER decide that caring for him was too much. He's like our child. In fact he pretty much IS a small child in a man's body. We ONLY want what's best for him. That's how he came to be with us to begin with. Thanks for your reply Ceara.

[ceara19]

Originally Posted by Powerless

We don't want a BIGGER home... we only want to OWN a home, as opposed to renting. He has no past or present debts as we pay for everything he needs and most of the things he wants IF we are able to afford it. And as far as home health care goes... my wife's job was gone before we ever got an answer to our questions about home health care. My brother needed someone to care for him that understands how to communicate with him. It's not just a matter of hiring just ANYBODY. We would NEVER EVER decide that caring for him was too much. He's like our child. In fact he pretty much IS a small child in a man's body. We ONLY want what's best for him. That's how he came to be with us to begin with. Thanks for your reply Ceara.

I don't know why your taking things so personally, because there's nothing personal to it. A 3rd party guardian wouldn't approve using your brother's money so that YOU and your wife can buy a home. That's just the way it is. They would likely approve a monthly stipend to cover the expenses though.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by ceara19

I don't know why your taking things so personally, because there's nothing personal to it. A 3rd party guardian wouldn't approve using your brother's money so that YOU and your wife can buy a home. That's just the way it is. They would likely approve a monthly stipend to cover the expenses though.

Someone does however, need to become his guardian. Someone competent needs to be in control of his money. A third party is not always the safest route either.

What might be appropriate is to put the money into a trust, and have several people (one of them being you) as joint trustees.

[ceara19]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

Someone does however, need to become his guardian. Someone competent needs to be in control of his money. A third party is not always the safest route either.

What might be appropriate is to put the money into a trust, and have several people (one of them being you) as joint trustees.

I didn't mean just a random 3rd party. I should have explained a little better. With the tug of war between mom & the OP, a professional guardian, preferably one recommended by the court, would be wise.