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Baby's Born

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WHOWELL90

Guest
What is the name of your state? What is the name of your state?
I live in n.y. my ex-girlfriend now lives in fl...here goes she calls me on july 23 to tell me my son was born this was at 3:20pm she says the baby was born @ 10:30am and she tells me she is home. she tells me she had the baby naturally and the midwife will come to her house to check up on her and the baby..something just didn't sound right to me how could she be home and she just gave birth...she gave me her home # which I called @ 7:20pm no one was home I left a mesg she never called me back july 24 I called all 43 hospitals in the fort lauderdale area and there is no record of her or the baby being born...so I call her job just to see if she was there somebody I spoke to told me she is not due in at this time which really sounded strange to me so I asked do you know if she had her baby there was a long pause and the girl said "i don't know" she sounded like I don't know what to say so I asked the girl do you know pat she said very well I than said thank you and hung up. I than had somebody else call her job to find out when is she due in they told my friend she is due in @ 12:00 noon now I'm thinking something is really wrong here she just gave birth and she calls me from home she is expacted at her job @ noon she than calls me at my job and asked did I call her job and ask did she have her baby yet I said yes because I don't believe you or trust you she said I don't want anybody knowing my business which really sounded strange she told me her job gave her a baby shower so I don't know what business she is talking about I asked her if she has a release form with her and the baby's name she hesatates and says yes I ask her when she gets the birth cert to please send me a copy she says why I said because I think I have a right if your saying I'm the father she says your name is not on it..and I wasn't there for the birth she says I don't care if you don't want to support your child I will send you some papers you will sign them and I can have a dna test and I will get my child support and she then hung up so I called her job back @ 12:15pm they said she won't be in today I then ask will she be in tommorrw the girl said I don't know let me get her supervisor I than hung up I called her job back on july 25 now they said she is on maturnty leave something is just not right here I'm 37 yrs old and raised my 19yr old daughter by myself I no something is wrong here....I need help what should I do.......
 


kat1963

Senior Member
If it were me, I'd be down there, at her house asking to see the baby. Airfare isn't that expensive considering what you are going thru. Doesn't sound like she was even p.g. Do you know for certain she was?

KAT
 

nailtech

Senior Member
midwives are still quite common these days... alot of women are getting back into having children at home, especially if they do not have maternity insurance...

you can also try an online search for birth cert....

Broward County...

the links are not working properly, so your going to have to copy and paste link into a browser, everything except the parts [URL=http://www.vitalrec.com/fl.html#State]Vital records
 
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usmcfamily

Senior Member
Did she actually say she ever went to the hospital? Many women opt for home or birth center births or private midwife residences/offices because it is SO much cheaper......that would explain why she is home and the lack of hospital record. Also there may be no record in the vital stats office yet if she went that route because there is a certain amount of time before the midwife has to report it..........
 
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WHOWELL90

Guest
BABY'S BORN

here something that I found out yesterday

well I had a friend call her job on july 29 posing as a old family friend they told her she's on maternity leave so my friend acted very surprised and said did she have the baby yet her co-worker said no she didn't so my friend said are you sure her co-worker said "oh I'm sure if she did an e-mail would have went through the whole company there big with things like that" now why would she lie to me and tell me the baby was born already I don't know but I'm not going to let her know that I know GAMES......she knows I'm not going to send her money until I get a blood test......:confused:
 
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jamieturn

Guest
Baby Born

I just gave birth 6 weeks ago with a midwife, not because its cheaper but because its safer. The info that your girlfriend gave you would be correct if she really did have the baby. They send you home 4 hours after the birth and come and visit you at home 24 hours later and then again a couple days later.

Hospitals are not given records of births outside of the hospital setting and there will not be a birth certificate until about 6 weeks after the birth..midwifes usually don't fill them out until then....which means it will take even longer for you to get a copy.

Now, whether or not she is telling you the truth about the baby really being born yet sounds suspisous.

I agree with the last person, fly there and see for yourself!!!

Hope this helps.
 
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WHOWELL90

Guest
Your right maybe I should go to fl. but I don't know where she lives I have a phone # and we are not speaking to each other but how come she didn't send a picture and she knows I don't trust her and she also knows I don't think she had the baby. I've spoken to a # of women and they have told me if it were them they would have waited until that baby started crying and then they would call me no matter how late it was and said " you hear your baby crying" now that doesn't mean the baby is mine but it's something to think about. My 90yr grandmother also said she never sent you a picture you have no prove that she was or is pregnant or she had the baby all you have is her word and I asked if there was a release form from the birthing center she said there was she never sent a copy......So why go to FL. I think even the courts would understand why I never went and I'm not rich I would have to stay at a motel and rent a car.....I don't have money like that now.....I have nothing to go on....... :confused:
 

kat1963

Senior Member
So why go to Florida? Cause it's eating you alive and will be for years unless you learn the truth!!! Fly standby, it's cheap, but can be a PITA. Rent a very cheap car. Fly back the same day...it's not that long a flight. Greyhound has very cheap prices right now, but it will take way longer. Did she transfer her mail? Get it from the post office. Do a reverse lookup on the phone number. You have her work number, go there, sit outside and wait until she leaves.

Personally, I don't think she was even pg.... friends at work are covering for her.

Good Luck!

KAT
 
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WHOWELL90

Guest
Yes you might be right but don't you think if she were pregnat and she was so sure I was the father wouldn't you at least send a picture and/or call me and let me hear the baby......send a release form.....something and your right it is eating me up because I raised my daughter by myself I'm not a dead beat dad the courts in n.y. know that....I just having nothing to go on....
 

kat1963

Senior Member
Listen, find out where she lives or works. Hire a detective agency in the area to follow her for 12 hours.....that should give you all the information you need to know. IF you only have the work number, you can fax down her photo and the number, the agency will take care of the rest. You can probably KNOW for SURE the answer to the question by Friday. Either she's moving around w/baby in tow, she's still pg, or she's just messing with your mind. If she's had the baby, you file to establish paternity, then custody/visitation/support...you'll have her address since the detective followed here there. I seriously doubt she is pg as I've seen this game played many times. She knows you are a good guy and she just can't resist having you by the family jewels for a little while longer (in case she decides to come back for something). We tend to call women like this a word that begins with B.
KAT
 
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jamieturn

Guest
Baby Born

Birthing Centers don't give you a release form when you leave to go home. So, she would not have a copy.

I agree with the last person, find out for sure if she was pg or even had the baby and then make sure it is yours.

If it turns out that she really was pg and the child was yours but you didn't pursue anything to really know for sure...... there is a statute of limitations in how long the state will give the father to establish paternity.....check with your state and the state where the child was born. It can be anywhere from 30 days to 2 years.
 

kidoday

Senior Member
If you know her # and work # then do the reverse # search on many websites.

If you have called her work you already know the name of the business and can easily find the address. By going to FL and to this place of work you will easily find out if she is truly working so soon after giving birth. Don't get me wrong some woman choose to do so. But, if not contact the local authorities for your rights.

Sounds to me she was not pg and is playing you, and the office girl answering the phone is now a close friend covering for her.

Stop with the secret calls and hang ups, they know it is you and now you look like the fool.

Take the time to go to FL and get it handled if you want to be a part of a childs life that may be yours. If indeed the child exists.

Good Luck
 

Grace_Adler

Senior Member
I agree with kidoday and kat 100%. I'll tell you something else too. Just for reference and something to think about. I don't know how it's done in other areas but I'll tell you how things are done here. 1.) The midwives here DO NOT & WILL NOT come to your home when you go into labor, you go to the hospital and they are supervised by the doctor in case there is a problem, like needing a c-section because midwives CAN NOT perform surgery. They also DO NOT & WILL NOT come to your home to check on you. You stay in the birthing center for a minimum of 24 hours. I had to sign a release form from the birthing center along with other papers. 2.) Midwives, Doctors & Nurses , here, DO NOT do the birth certificates,although they do have to sign them. They have a dept that handles all that and the woman comes to the room with all the paperwork (or man). 3.) Here, it doesn't take 6 wks to get a copy of the birth certificate.

I do totally agree that she either wasn't pregnant, possibly had the baby but lied about when, or she just took maternity leave, people usually take maternity leave 2 weeks before they're due, and she's still pregnant. Either way it's obvious she's playing games.

If you get papers for child support, deny paternity so you can have a DNA test done, then file for custody and visitation as kat said.

Good Luck!
 
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WHOWELL90

Guest
I just wanted to thank all of you for your advice I'm going to wait and see if she sends any type of paper work to me I will request a DNA test OF COURSE and if it is proven that I am the father I want full custody I know it will be hard but I raised my daughter by myself and I will raise my son as well......to this date I still haven't heard anything from her.....So far to me this is a good thing.....but things tend to change very fast. Every week I'm getting a money order for 50 dollars just to save just in case and a money order also has the date on it.....so again thanks I will keep you posted.........
 

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