(question pertains to New Jersey)
I'm trying to resolve a very frustrating situation, and would appreciate suggestions.
This relates to cohabitation, not marriage/divorce. My ex and I were together for 3 years, the last year cohabitating full time in a rental property. We are both in our 40's. She decided to end the relationship this past March, but left things in "limbo" in terms of reconciliation. I was the one to move out, as her name is on the lease, kids in school there, etc. Because of logistics, and the fact that my home town is half way across the country, I had to leave 99% of my belongings temporarily behind (which was fine with her).
After several months of long distance separation with her maintaining contact all along, she suddenly announced that she was done and I would need to get my things out of there. Fair enough. Through this point, we had remained cordial and amicable with a very mature dynamic. That was our last phone call, and everything since has been e-mail. I sent a single sentence stating I would be making arrangements, and would let her know when I could do this move (remember, I'm half way across the country).
I'm still stunned, but she flipped out. She works in the legal field by trade (but has been unemployed for quite some time), and has several connections. She sent me an e-mail stating she has been 'advised' to hold my belongings as collateral for some undisclosed period of time, and for some unknown dollar amount - for the purpose of being 'reimbursed' for general life expenses during the time we were together. Also stated the eventual sale of my things. In other words... extortion. As I stated, we had always been amicable, and our relationship never contained abuse or infidelity. She has no reason to be suddenly so vindictive and irrational.
I already know that she has no legal basis for any of this. There was no contract or cohabitation agreement (as per her state's requirements for any civil claim), and no contractual purchases (cars, mortgages, etc) of any sort. I'm also aware that her denying me reasonable access to my belongings violates at least one civil and two criminal statutes.
My question is - is there a simple way for me to retrieve my belongings? I have to jump through a lot of hoops just to arrange the logistics, and am currently unemployed and without funds to pursue any legal battle. I really don't see the reason for a fight (I still don't understand what she's doing), and wanted this to go amicably, say goodbye, and move on with our lives, but that doesn't look likely at this point. Do I just show up there with a cop?
Help!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
I'm trying to resolve a very frustrating situation, and would appreciate suggestions.
This relates to cohabitation, not marriage/divorce. My ex and I were together for 3 years, the last year cohabitating full time in a rental property. We are both in our 40's. She decided to end the relationship this past March, but left things in "limbo" in terms of reconciliation. I was the one to move out, as her name is on the lease, kids in school there, etc. Because of logistics, and the fact that my home town is half way across the country, I had to leave 99% of my belongings temporarily behind (which was fine with her).
After several months of long distance separation with her maintaining contact all along, she suddenly announced that she was done and I would need to get my things out of there. Fair enough. Through this point, we had remained cordial and amicable with a very mature dynamic. That was our last phone call, and everything since has been e-mail. I sent a single sentence stating I would be making arrangements, and would let her know when I could do this move (remember, I'm half way across the country).
I'm still stunned, but she flipped out. She works in the legal field by trade (but has been unemployed for quite some time), and has several connections. She sent me an e-mail stating she has been 'advised' to hold my belongings as collateral for some undisclosed period of time, and for some unknown dollar amount - for the purpose of being 'reimbursed' for general life expenses during the time we were together. Also stated the eventual sale of my things. In other words... extortion. As I stated, we had always been amicable, and our relationship never contained abuse or infidelity. She has no reason to be suddenly so vindictive and irrational.
I already know that she has no legal basis for any of this. There was no contract or cohabitation agreement (as per her state's requirements for any civil claim), and no contractual purchases (cars, mortgages, etc) of any sort. I'm also aware that her denying me reasonable access to my belongings violates at least one civil and two criminal statutes.
My question is - is there a simple way for me to retrieve my belongings? I have to jump through a lot of hoops just to arrange the logistics, and am currently unemployed and without funds to pursue any legal battle. I really don't see the reason for a fight (I still don't understand what she's doing), and wanted this to go amicably, say goodbye, and move on with our lives, but that doesn't look likely at this point. Do I just show up there with a cop?
Help!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
