Elderly Relative, Possible Legal Problem

[jwredden]

What is the name of your state? Oklahoma

My wife's grandmother, who is 85, lives with us. The house is mortgaged as Joint Tenancy with Rights of Survivorship for $118,000 of the $151,000 appraised value. We make all the payments, utilities, home owner's insurance, and even pay to feed her on the weekends. She fell and broke her leg this past Monday morning and is in the hospital after having surgery to get it fixed. The surgeon told my wife that her grandmother would have to go to rehab for a few weeks and if she couldn't get around after that they would discuss placing her in a nursing facility permanently. Today, her grandmother informed her that she may get to come home Saturday. There is no one there to take care of her since I work and my wife is in school. We have 3 kids and can't stay home all the time. Her doctor is avoiding us and we don't know if by getting the state involved if we could be forced to sell our home since she is on the title and mortgage. Also, since we provide for her, is there any way to force the doctors to include us in any decisions that are made. She is talking about hiring someone to stay with her all the time, but she only draws $747 a month in Social Security and I don't see how she could afford it. I also don't need her moving in another person and if they get hurt on our property turn around and sue us and our insurance company.

Thanks for any help provided. I can try to give more details if I've left anything out.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I'VE POSTED THIS IN THE WRONG SECTION.

Jason

[BlondiePB]

Originally Posted by jwredden

What is the name of your state? Oklahoma

My wife's grandmother, who is 85, lives with us. The house is mortgaged as Joint Tenancy with Rights of Survivorship for $118,000 of the $151,000 appraised value. We make all the payments, utilities, home owner's insurance, and even pay to feed her on the weekends. She fell and broke her leg this past Monday morning and is in the hospital after having surgery to get it fixed. The surgeon told my wife that her grandmother would have to go to rehab for a few weeks and if she couldn't get around after that they would discuss placing her in a nursing facility permanently. Today, her grandmother informed her that she may get to come home Saturday. There is no one there to take care of her since I work and my wife is in school. We have 3 kids and can't stay home all the time. Her doctor is avoiding us and we don't know if by getting the state involved if we could be forced to sell our home since she is on the title and mortgage. Also, since we provide for her, is there any way to force the doctors to include us in any decisions that are made. She is talking about hiring someone to stay with her all the time, but she only draws $747 a month in Social Security and I don't see how she could afford it. I also don't need her moving in another person and if they get hurt on our property turn around and sue us and our insurance company.

Thanks for any help provided. I can try to give more details if I've left anything out.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I'VE POSTED THIS IN THE WRONG SECTION.

Jason

Home from where, the hospital?

[rmet4nzkx]

Originally Posted by jwredden

What is the name of your state? Oklahoma

My wife's grandmother, who is 85, lives with us. The house is mortgaged as Joint Tenancy with Rights of Survivorship for $118,000 of the $151,000 appraised value. We make all the payments, utilities, home owner's insurance, and even pay to feed her on the weekends. She fell and broke her leg this past Monday morning and is in the hospital after having surgery to get it fixed. The surgeon told my wife that her grandmother would have to go to rehab for a few weeks and if she couldn't get around after that they would discuss placing her in a nursing facility permanently. Today, her grandmother informed her that she may get to come home Saturday. There is no one there to take care of her since I work and my wife is in school. We have 3 kids and can't stay home all the time. Her doctor is avoiding us and we don't know if by getting the state involved if we could be forced to sell our home since she is on the title and mortgage. Also, since we provide for her, is there any way to force the doctors to include us in any decisions that are made. She is talking about hiring someone to stay with her all the time, but she only draws $747 a month in Social Security and I don't see how she could afford it. I also don't need her moving in another person and if they get hurt on our property turn around and sue us and our insurance company.

Thanks for any help provided. I can try to give more details if I've left anything out.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I'VE POSTED THIS IN THE WRONG SECTION.

Jason

YOu might check with the hospital's discharge supervisor, It is possible Mother is getting confused about rehab? They can assist you in making plans for Mother. Is she competent? Do you have a POA? Also call your local department on aging or independent living centers for access to programs to assist your family. Perhaps there are some elder care day programs she can attend, meals on wheels to bring in lunch.

[BlondiePB]

Originally Posted by rmet4nzkx

YOu might check with the hospital's discharge supervisor, It is possible Mother is getting confused about rehab? They can assist you in making plans for Mother. Is she competent? Do you have a POA? Also call your local department on aging or independent living centers for access to programs to assist your family. Perhaps there are some elder care day programs she can attend, meals on wheels to bring in lunch.

I agree about the poster's mom being mixed up. That's why I asked home from the hospital. She needs to go to rehab in a nursing home. We both know no elder can recover from a broken hip enough to go home this fast. She will qualify for nursing home coverage under her insurance. Hopefully, she has more than just Medicare, like a supplemental, or an HMO that will cover 100% up to 100 days.

[jwredden]

Yes, home from the hospital. It is the truth too. Her doctor that she's been with for 30 years is allowing her to come home instead of rehab. She has refused the rehab treatment and since she is of sound mind they claim they can't do anything. We are looking into guardianship today so I'm not sure what else we can do. She lives with us and we pay for everything so we should have so say in what happens to her.

[BlondiePB]

Originally Posted by jwredden

Yes, home from the hospital. It is the truth too. Her doctor that she's been with for 30 years is allowing her to come home instead of rehab. She has refused the rehab treatment and since she is of sound mind they claim they can't do anything. We are looking into guardianship today so I'm not sure what else we can do. She lives with us and we pay for everything so we should have so say in what happens to her.

Do you have medical and durable power of attorney?

[jwredden]

No power of attorney. We got our attorney to contact the doctor and ask for a waiver of responsibility saying they are allowing her to go home against our wishes and the doctor backed up pretty quick. Now she has to try rehab for 10 days and see if they can help her.

[stealth2]

Originally Posted by BlondiePB

We both know no elder can recover from a broken hip enough to go home this fast.

Except she didn't break her hip. Her leg is what OP posted.

[BlondiePB]

Originally Posted by stealth2

Except she didn't break her hip. Her leg is what OP posted.

Thanks for catching that stealth. That's what I get for reading without my specs and not enough coffee in the morning.

[BlondiePB]

Originally Posted by jwredden

No power of attorney. We got our attorney to contact the doctor and ask for a waiver of responsibility saying they are allowing her to go home against our wishes and the doctor backed up pretty quick. Now she has to try rehab for 10 days and see if they can help her.

Okay. Without gram being declared incompetent by the court, she cannot have a guardian appointed. This is something that courts take serious. A competent person can sign a POA. You need to discuss your options, including buying out gram for the house with your attorney.

Most states have a medically needy program for low income elders. This is applied for on a DHS/DCF/Medicaid application. When SS & SSD beneficiaries qualify for this, the state pays for the beneficiaries Medicare deductible and medical expenses after a determined (by DCF) amount of money spent per month. If gram is not signed up on a Medicare HMO, check into them at the Medicare website. This will not affect the medically needy program. If gram is a widow of an honorably discharged veteran, check for any benefits with the Veteran's Administration for which she may be eligible.

If private duty is hired to "gram-sit" during the day when she is alone, make sure one is hired from an agency. The agency will cover the employee with work comp and liablity insurance.