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  #1  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:39 PM
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ex husband wants me to sign a paper I'm unsure about

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? UT

My X says for financial aid (he wants to return to university, so he says) he wants me to sign a paper stating he has paid 51% of the support for the child we had together. Which is a lie. He wants me to state he did so for 2007 and 2008. I pay the majority of the costs, have bought the child's health & dental insurance, paid medical bills, etc. I claim him on my taxes. And as an aside, the x-husband has never paid one cent of the child support that was written in our divorce papers. I feel uncomfortable about lying, but I don't have receipts for everything so I could never really say for sure who pays for what anyway (except the insurance records and hospital bills). And I also worry about what that means for my taxes. I plan on claiming him for 2008, but if I sign this it seems like he would automatically have to. And as far as 2007, would it then look I lied on those tax forms by claiming him when now I say he provided 51% of the support for the child?

I would love to help him go back to school. But I feel there is something not right about doing this. I also suspect it is a ploy to claim him on his taxes. He always wants to, but never can because I do.

He is calling and calling and I am avoiding him until I know for sure what are the consequences if I were to sign such a statement. I know I really need to say no, but I want solid reasons to give him so I am not just being a bitch.

Sorry if I put this in the wrong place.
  #2  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:42 PM
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Don't lie.
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  #3  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:44 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by seniorjudge View Post
Don't lie.
And don't sign anything knowing it contains lies.
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  #4  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:44 PM
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Of course not, but I want to tell my X the good reasons I can't do it, if that makes sense.

He really pressures me and I want something firm to stand on. The "I can't lie" wont work with him, he will say "prove it" that I have spent more, and I can't.
  #5  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L33L33 View Post
Of course not, but I want to tell my X the good reasons I can't do it, if that makes sense.

He really pressures me and I want something firm to stand on. The "I can't lie" wont work with him, he will say "prove it" that I have spent more, and I can't.
That's a personal problem.
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." (Ford)
  #6  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:47 PM
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So if I can't prove it, he saved receipts and I didn't, I'm screwed. Then I do have to sign it. This really sucks. Thanks for all your quick responses. Maybe I need to see if he indeed has receipts up his sleeve. Bugger.
  #7  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L33L33 View Post
...
Of course not, but I want to tell my X the good reasons I can't do it, if that makes sense.
...
How about: "I am not going to lie because it is wrong!"
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  #8  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L33L33 View Post
So if I can't prove it, he saved receipts and I didn't, I'm screwed. Then I do have to sign it. This really sucks. Thanks for all your quick responses. Maybe I need to see if he indeed has receipts up his sleeve. Bugger.
Why do you think that?
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  #9  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by seniorjudge View Post
How about: "I am not going to lie because it is wrong!"
Therein lies the personal problem of which I typed.

Try here:
[url=http://www.irs.ustreas.gov/faqs/]Frequently Asked Tax Questions and Answers[/url]
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"Judges want people to be reasonable. Where one parent won't be reasonable, judges still want the other parent to remain reasonable." (Ford)
  #10  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:53 PM
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I agree with you sr judge, I am just preparing if he tries to have me show the receipts- I can't. I never thought I would have to. The kid is 15 now and we split when he was 1. After this long, I never thought this would be an issue. I totally agree it should be simple. I wont lie, full stop. But on the other hand, I have no proof of most of my expenses. Anyway, sorry for continuing, thank you all again.
  #11  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L33L33 View Post
Of course not, but I want to tell my X the good reasons I can't do it, if that makes sense.
No, it doesn't. The most basic reason is that you won't lie. Anything beyond that is gravy.
If he feels that he paid more, let HIM prove it.
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I am not an attorney. Review the information yourself to make an informed decision.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by grndslm View Post
Right. That is a statute... just as I'd presumed.

Yea! Ziggy the Court Jester presiding.
It is not LAW.

Gender references shall apply equally to the other gender. I will not correct gender mistakes (unless I want to)
  #12  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:54 PM
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Let's be clear. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SIGN ANYTHING

Any other questions?
__________________
*
*
I am not an attorney. Review the information yourself to make an informed decision.

Communication is KEY - 10 mins of talking now can save you months of headaches later!

Masterfully stating the obvious to the oblivious! (Thanks SP!)

Chuckle of the day:
Quote:
Originally Posted by grndslm View Post
Right. That is a statute... just as I'd presumed.

Yea! Ziggy the Court Jester presiding.
It is not LAW.

Gender references shall apply equally to the other gender. I will not correct gender mistakes (unless I want to)
  #13  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by seniorjudge View Post
Why do you think that?
That he has receipts? He is acting sneaky.

That I would have to sign it? Good question. I suppose I worry that if I can't back up my claim (or conversely that he can back his up- even though false) legally wouldn't he have the right to make that statement? That is what makes it confusing.
  #14  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L33L33 View Post
I agree with you sr judge, I am just preparing if he tries to have me show the receipts- I can't. I never thought I would have to. The kid is 15 now and we split when he was 1. After this long, I never thought this would be an issue. I totally agree it should be simple. I wont lie, full stop. But on the other hand, I have no proof of most of my expenses. Anyway, sorry for continuing, thank you all again.
Let's be clear. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SIGN ANYTHING

Any other questions?
__________________
There are two rules for success:

(1) Never tell everything you know.
  #15  
Old 12-30-2008, 04:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zigner View Post
Let's be clear. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SIGN ANYTHING

Any other questions?
Dearie, move on to the next question (if there is one).
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(1) Never tell everything you know.
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