Girlfriend causing hostile living situation

[Stuck Throttle]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Alaska

Ok so my girlfriend/fiance split about 3 months ago after I discovered she was seeing another man. Things around the house have increasingly become hostile I have resorted to not communicating with her (which she claims is make her living situation very bad) because we always fight now if we talk. We are both stubborn and do not back down. Neither of us is physically violent. I moved my senior mother into the apartment in August to help with my two boys. My mother is not on the lease, but will be added. My ex agreed months ago that she could come move in and help us during the school year without being charged rent.

So here we are. My ex refuses to pay half rent. I now pay two-thirds even though my mother is not on the lease. She has called our landlord telling him lies. She somehow got into my cell phone account and closed my account. And now she has hinted to threatening me with a restraining order and lying about abuse. I will say this. She is a great person, but we hate each other. I don't know what to do to protect myself. Do I get a restraining order? For what? Is there something else I can do? I cannot move out now because of my mother. I noticed lately little things are missing from the apt so I am thinking maybe she will leave. I have tried several times to talk calmly, but it doesn't work. We just can't talk to each other any more. I am already getting screwed over enough here with bills and getting another cell phone. Is there anything I can do to protect myself from coming home one day to find a false police claim on me?

[Banned_Princess]

Originally Posted by Stuck Throttle

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Alaska

Ok so my girlfriend/fiance split about 3 months ago after I discovered she was seeing another man. Things around the house have increasingly become hostile I have resorted to not communicating with her (which she claims is make her living situation very bad) because we always fight now if we talk. We are both stubborn and do not back down. Neither of us is physically violent. I moved my senior mother into the apartment in August to help with my two boys. My mother is not on the lease, but will be added. My ex agreed months ago that she could come move in and help us during the school year without being charged rent.

So here we are. My ex refuses to pay half rent. I now pay two-thirds even though my mother is not on the lease. She has called our landlord telling him lies. She somehow got into my cell phone account and closed my account. And now she has hinted to threatening me with a restraining order and lying about abuse. I will say this. She is a great person, but we hate each other. I don't know what to do to protect myself. Do I get a restraining order? For what? Is there something else I can do? I cannot move out now because of my mother. I noticed lately little things are missing from the apt so I am thinking maybe she will leave. I have tried several times to talk calmly, but it doesn't work. We just can't talk to each other any more. I am already getting screwed over enough here with bills and getting another cell phone. Is there anything I can do to protect myself from coming home one day to find a false police claim on me?

Is she on the lease?

Have you spoke to your LL about the situation?

Maybe your LL will be willing to let you out the lease in order to move with some sort of extra payment ( Maybe 3 months severence ) I know thats high, but it may get worse for you quick if you dont go, cause theres nothing to stop her from claiming DV on you. (Sorry, but there's not) Then I would get a Order of a protection on her.

[Stuck Throttle]

Originally Posted by Banned_Princess

Is she on the lease?

Have you spoke to your LL about the situation?

Maybe your LL will be willing to let you out the lease in order to move with some sort of extra payment ( Maybe 3 months severence ) I know thats high, but it may get worse for you quick if you dont go, cause theres nothing to stop her from claiming DV on you. (Sorry, but there's not) Then I would get a Order of a protection on her.

What would I say if I got an Order of Protection? She isn't physically abusive. I cannot move out because of my kids and mother. My LL I am sure has no problem with whatever we do. I told him that one of us is staying. I am kinda thinking he is leaning towards her side. He hasn't given me a new agreement to add my mother and he didn't suggest making my ex pay her half of the rent. I don't know, I think I'm gonna get boned here.

[Banned_Princess]

Originally Posted by Stuck Throttle

What would I say if I got an Order of Protection? She isn't physically abusive. I cannot move out because of my kids and mother. My LL I am sure has no problem with whatever we do. I told him that one of us is staying. I am kinda thinking he is leaning towards her side. He hasn't given me a new agreement to add my mother and he didn't suggest making my ex pay her half of the rent. I don't know, I think I'm gonna get boned here.

Well, I am not going to say you should go there complaining that she is hitting you. in my home you can get a "refrain from" order if you are being harassed, or stalked, or threatened. And I would say that she is threatening to press false charges on you, is threatining... but others may not agree with that. You could always go to your present and report that she has threatened to falsely report you are abusing her. I kinda think she would need to show some evidence of any "abuse" but times are tricky and I have heard of it happening, so give them a heads up, get it in a report and be careful.

If the 2 of you are on the lease you have an equal right to stay. so, you cant make her move, and if you don't want to move either you need to keep track of what of her portion you are paying, then at the end of the lease when one of you goes (cause you cant continue to live that way) sue her for her portion of the whole ordeal.

You and your mom and your kids should get a new spot for yourselves ASAP. Leave her with the apartment and bills, and if you have to stop paying bills to do so then so be it. you really just need to get out of there definitely.

Yes you appear to be getting boned in this situation... sorry.

If the LL is on her side kind of unfortunate, because he will not be willing to evict her. And you cant... Be careful about who you live with from now on, its not good for your kids.

[FarmerJ]

If you must stay on then rent a post office box and have all of your mail, not any joint mail but all of your mail sent there to protect your self from identity theft or misuse of information by her, open a bank box to store your tax and other vital information& inc pictures of personal property that is yours only, and a extra copy of the lease, any credit cards and such you can live without while your waiting to see if she leaves, use a note book to log threats or things that are serious and if needed plan on finding a new place to live with proper notice to the current LL. If it appears she decides to leave sooner so be it, talk to the LL about door lock changes AFTER you atleast do a fast consult with a atty so you know how to treat her abandoning the rental agreement.