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07-27-2008, 05:10 AM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 1
| | | leaving an abusive husband
What is the name of your state texas
My friend is married to an abusive husband. She has 5 kids 3 by a prior marriage and 2 by the abusive husband. And wants to leave him and move in with another man. But her mother says that under Texas law that's it's child endangerment.to leave and move in with another man. certainly this isn't true right ? what legal rights does my friend have. |
07-27-2008, 06:49 AM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 21,742
| | | She wants to move in with another man while running from a supposedly abusive husband? That is a good way of losing custody of the children. She is NOT showing good judgment. Leaving her allegedly abusive husband is one thing -- staying with him is not good if he is abusive and could count as child endangerment. But using him as an excuse to move in with another man? If her children's father wants to take her to court she can look at losing custody.
__________________
Parents should remember two things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex (or soon to be ex) and when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death parts you.
Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship. My advice is based on the law and not deemed to necessarily apply to the specifics of your case. The devil is in the details after all. |
07-27-2008, 07:54 AM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 33,531
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by Ohiogal  She wants to move in with another man while running from a supposedly abusive husband? That is a good way of losing custody of the children. She is NOT showing good judgment. Leaving her allegedly abusive husband is one thing -- staying with him is not good if he is abusive and could count as child endangerment. But using him as an excuse to move in with another man? If her children's father wants to take her to court she can look at losing custody. | On top of that, one of the main reasons why women end up with abusers, is that they don't take the time and effort to learn to support their households on their own, and to take the time to know someone VERY well, before deciding to marry or live with them.
Your friend may need help to get started, or may need to live with family to start off with, but its time for her to learn to provide for her children herself, so that the next man she lets into her life, is a keeper.
__________________
in vino veritas |
07-27-2008, 07:57 PM
| | Junior Member | | Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 13
| | | Your friend needs abuse counseling; not another man. She is repeating the abuse pattern. The blogger who stated that by moving in with another man could be detrimental to her icase in receiving custody of her children is correct. Abusers use two well-known tactics to keep control of the situation and their victim. They either try to prove that the woman is promiscuous or mentally imbalanced and therefore an unfit mother. A clever attorney will be able to prove to the judge that your friend is guilty of both accusations. She is involved with another man and she is endangering her children's emotional health. She needs to seek counseling for abused women ASAP to prove that she is an abused woman and that she getting help to recover. This will prove that she is genuinely cares for her children's well-being. Also, she needs to be the "perfect" mother and not give her abuser any ammunition to bury her in court. Remember her first priority is her children and she needs to be emotionally healthy to care for them. She has to prove her stability and that she is fit to care for her children. Good luck.  |
07-27-2008, 08:25 PM
| | Senior Member | | Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 21,742
| | | You are assuming that the husband actually is abusive and that is proven or has been proven. The proof is the problem. And we are NOT bloggers on here just to let you know.
__________________
Parents should remember two things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex (or soon to be ex) and when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death parts you.
Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship. My advice is based on the law and not deemed to necessarily apply to the specifics of your case. The devil is in the details after all. |
07-29-2008, 01:22 AM
| | Member | | Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 145
| | | I can only assume what the senior members have told you regarding the legal issues are true, I have no cause to doubt them and you shouldn't either. However, the legal issues aside for a moment. My first husband was abusive, not only to me but to my first child as well. I left, however I was very young and very immature, I moved in with a man 12 years older than me. I eventually married this man and we had two children together. HOWEVER, the smartest thing I could have done was to leave with my two young sons and go home, to my parents, or, find a place of my own for a time. I was very afraid to stay alone because of my husband however, I could have and should have stayed at my parents, out of state, at least for a while. The one smart thing I did was get in writing, notarized and filed that I had custody of our children, that held up in court until our divorce was finalized.
Best of luck. | |
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