Marriage of a minor without parental consent

[solusipse]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? My state is North Carolina, hers is Idaho

My girlfriend and I want to marry, so that we can be together and raise our almost 10 month old daughter as a family. However Her mother lost custody of her, and she is currently in the custody of her aunt and uncle in Idaho. Not only will they not give consent, but they will also not allow her to visit me, or me to visit her there. She lives in a three bedroom mobile home with her aunt, uncle, two sisters, 4 brothers, cousin, and daughter. Her aunt and uncle have a combined income of maybe 30,000 per year, presumably. There is also an extensive history of drug use, and if I'm not mistaken drug trafficking as well.
I'm 20, My girlfriend is 17. I have a clean criminal record, other than a couple traffic tickets.
I do not have substantial income, and I still live at home, which is also a three bedroom mobile home. However I only live with my mother and sister both of which are moving to Australia in a matter of months and leaving my house to me. I do have a lot of family in the area to help if things get tight though.
Anyway my overall question is, can I petition the court to allow us to marry without the consent of her legal guardian under these circumstances? It seems to me to be clearly in her best interest, as well as that of myself, and our daughter.

 

[Rushia]

I don't know what you expect of us. I thought we were a waste of space?

We told you repeatedly that you will NOT be able to see or marry your girlfriend until she is 18.

 

[solusipse]

I don't know what you expect of us. I thought we were a waste of space?

We told you repeatedly that you will NOT be able to see or marry your girlfriend until she is 18.

isn't wasting space what you just did with that post

look i know in some states you can petition the court to marry without consent in the event of pregnancy i just don't know about the two states i'm asking about
I haven't turned up much on google either
so i thought i would see if anyone knew anything about the process
btw
DSS is no longer involved so we will not require their approval
i would just like to know what the process for petitioning the court would be
ok?

oh and by the way i just saw her last month

 

[Rushia]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? My state is North Carolina, hers is Idaho

My girlfriend and I want to marry, so that we can be together and raise our almost 10 month old daughter as a family. However Her mother lost custody of her, and she is currently in the custody of her aunt and uncle in Idaho. Not only will they not give consent, but they will also not allow her to visit me, or me to visit her there. She lives in a three bedroom mobile home with her aunt, uncle, two sisters, 4 brothers, cousin, and daughter. Her aunt and uncle have a combined income of maybe 30,000 per year, presumably. There is also an extensive history of drug use, and if I'm not mistaken drug trafficking as well.
I'm 20, My girlfriend is 17. I have a clean criminal record, other than a couple traffic tickets.
I do not have substantial income, and I still live at home, which is also a three bedroom mobile home. However I only live with my mother and sister both of which are moving to Australia in a matter of months and leaving my house to me. I do have a lot of family in the area to help if things get tight though.
Anyway my overall question is, can I petition the court to allow us to marry without the consent of her legal guardian under these circumstances? It seems to me to be clearly in her best interest, as well as that of myself, and our daughter.

isn't wasting space what you just did with that post

look i know in some states you can petition the court to marry without consent in the event of pregnancy i just don't know about the two states i'm asking about
I haven't turned up much on google either
so i thought i would see if anyone knew anything about the process
btw
DSS is no longer involved so we will not require their approval
i would just like to know what the process for petitioning the court would be
ok?

oh and by the way i just saw her last month

Make up your mind.

Your accusations are just silly. Your gf was placed there after a complete check.

I do believe that you would be laughed out of the courtroom with your petition. Wait until she's 18 and then you can do as you please.

 

[solusipse]

Actually her younger siblings were placed there
she was placed in the custody of another aunt who has since decided she can't handle the responsibility
and technically custody hasn't been transferred yet
the court date for that is tomorrow and it is possible the aunt and uncle in question will not be granted custody
the aunt she was living with was going to sign a consent to marriage form, i was just trying to get everything set up for it but it's a bit late for that now

why do you think i would get laughed at?
there are legal precedents for this type of thing
and i can provide a safer, more stable living environment
i don't see what's outrageous about that

also, the only reason her younger siblings were placed there is because that was the only family member willing to take all of them


oh and they're not accusations
her aunt and uncle both have criminal histories relating to drugs
her uncle has served time for selling cocaine
and her aunt's oldest daughter just moved out because she believes her mom may be using again because she slapped her around and according to her she only did that when she was using
they passed their drug screens at the time of placement
but they had several months of notice
and that doesn't mean they couldn't be using again

 

[LdiJ]

In all reality I can't see you getting anywhere with anything until your girlfriend turns 18.

However, you may be able to get custody of your child...particularly if your girlfriend agrees.

 

[>Charlotte<]

You were here in March looking for help, but when you were told you were wrong you said you had it all figured out and we were “idiots”. Here you were in June, though, still needing help. When you were told you were still wrong you said you found everything you needed somewhere else and this forum was a waste of bandwidth. And here you are again.

So, you’ve had seven months to put that “185 IQ” (cough, cough) to good use, but it doesn’t seem to be working out too well for you. Let’s take a little trip down memory lane, shall we?

I'm going to see to it that she is charged with perjury either way, I'm just hoping that when she is the case will have to be dismissed.

So, how’d that work out for you?

I already intend on consulting a lawyer I really just came here to see if anyone actually knew if Perjury was grounds for dismissal and so far no one has really addressed the actual question.

What did the lawyer you consulted tell you?

My intentions were to get the evidence to someone acting on my girlfriend's behalf in court and have them present it to the judge. I'm not just some stupid kid I know how the legal system works.

And how’d that work out for you?

I fully intend to go through the proper channels to deal with this. Once I have indisputable evidence I intend to present it both to DSS offices and the authorities.

What happened when you presented it to DSS and the authorities? Oh, you didn’t? Bummer.

One way or another, she is going to be with me.

But not yet?

All routes lead to the same destination. Either she is released from foster care and comes to live with me, she goes to her father and gets consent to marry me(or moves out considering she's over 16 and can legally do so), or she moves in with her aunt and uncle which would be about the same as with her dad. I was simply seeking the best method to reach this endpoint.

Run into a few roadblocks?

And trust me on this; I have the persistence, wit, and willpower to find a way to make this happen.

No, I don’t think I’ll trust you on that.

nevermind i found what i needed on my own

And what was it you found? It doesn’t appear to be what you needed.

and if it comes down to it i'll go to idaho and marry her. instant emancipation ba-da-ching

Haven’t done that yet?

this forum is such a waste of good bandwidth

No, it’s really not. We see a lot of arrogance like yours. We don’t see (for obvious reasons) the guy who has the same unrealistic expectations as you, reads your thread, listens to the people who are providing facts, understands he really doesn’t have it all figured out, uses a little common sense, applies it to his own situation, and just goes and deals with whatever his reality is. Those are the people who find real help here.

You really do have a lot of nerve coming here and asking for help, insulting the people who try to tell you the truth, and then actually coming back and asking those same people for more help. Your arrogant sense of entitlement isn’t helping you here, and it sure as heck doesn’t seem to be getting you anywhere with your problem.

 

[solusipse]

You were here in March looking for help, but when you were told you were wrong you said you had it all figured out and we were “idiots”. Here you were in June, though, still needing help. When you were told you were still wrong you said you found everything you needed somewhere else and this forum was a waste of bandwidth. And here you are again.

So, you’ve had seven months to put that “185 IQ” (cough, cough) to good use, but it doesn’t seem to be working out too well for you. Let’s take a little trip down memory lane, shall we?



So, how’d that work out for you?



What did the lawyer you consulted tell you?



And how’d that work out for you?



What happened when you presented it to DSS and the authorities? Oh, you didn’t? Bummer.



But not yet?



Run into a few roadblocks?



No, I don’t think I’ll trust you on that.



And what was it you found? It doesn’t appear to be what you needed.



Haven’t done that yet?



No, it’s really not. We see a lot of arrogance like yours. We don’t see (for obvious reasons) the guy who has the same unrealistic expectations as you, reads your thread, listens to the people who are providing facts, understands he really doesn’t have it all figured out, uses a little common sense, applies it to his own situation, and just goes and deals with whatever his reality is. Those are the people who find real help here.

You really do have a lot of nerve coming here and asking for help, insulting the people who try to tell you the truth, and then actually coming back and asking those same people for more help. Your arrogant sense of entitlement isn’t helping you here, and it sure as heck doesn’t seem to be getting you anywhere with your problem.

the people i insult are people like you who have absolutely nothing constructive to say and rather take to chastising the people who come looking for information

i know it is possible to petition the court to grant a marriage license without the consent of a guardian if it is deemed to be in the best interest of the person in question
i'm just not sure whether there are laws supporting it in idaho or north carolina
or what steps need to be taken exactly

i admit to being overzealous about some trivial things in the past, but in all fairness you have a knack for coming off as a pompous jerk

anyway what i need to know is the proper procedure because i'm not sure how to initiate this kind of court proceeding


oh btw this was not supposed to be a "can i do this question" i forgot the word how in my original post

 

[solusipse]

In all reality I can't see you getting anywhere with anything until your girlfriend turns 18.

However, you may be able to get custody of your child...particularly if your girlfriend agrees.

i've considered that, but i have no desire to take my daughter out of her custody

it's not really waiting a year that bothers me anyway, it's the fact that my gf's aunt's own daughter just moved out because her mom slapped her around and thinks she's on drugs

i just don't know what i'd do if she did something like that to my girlfriend or daughter

 

[Nativity]

Why not work on yourself before bringing your girlfriend down there with you and into your life? Get a stable job, save money as much as you can. Plan your life out more, create a financially stable life for you and your daughter and your daughter's Mom. And when that is set up see where you both are at that point in time.

 

[solusipse]

Why not work on yourself before bringing your girlfriend down there with you and into your life? Get a stable job, save money as much as you can. Plan your life out more, create a financially stable life for you and your daughter and your daughter's Mom. And when that is set up see where you both are at that point in time.

that's what i've been doing up until this point, but now with her living where she is, in an overcrowded home where there is the possibility of drug use and abuse i'm afraid that just isn't an option

our original plan up until this point was to get everything like that secure first and then her aunt was going to sign a consent form
however she decided she didn't want the responsibility of having her there, and then pretty much was unreachable for two weeks when i could have gone, gotten the license and been through with it
so now this is what i'm left with

 

[Nativity]

I know that it's not what you want to hear and will most likely disregard what I say but neither Idaho nor North Carolina provide any loopholes that you are looking for. Both states require at the time of applying for a license that each party has a SSN, Birth Certificate and Consent from a guardian if under the age of 18.

If she is in an abusive and dangerous household your only option is for you or her to make a report on it.

Any other action that you take, going in thinking you have rights when you don't, except possibly when it comes to your daughter, may only blow up in not only your face but in the face of your girlfriend and your daughter and could potentially make things worse for those involved in the long run.

However, while I realize you don't want to take custody of your Daughter away from your girlfriend, but if your girlfriend is really in such a horrible place around all types of substances it may be in your daughter's best interest to seek custody until you three can be completely together.

Whatever you do don't go into a situation where it might already be hostile being completely headstrong about it. It is in moments like those where we end up loosing all reality and common sense and can occasionally make a situation even worse.

 

[solusipse]

yeh i know they don't have the loophole for children, unfortunately
and i know what the requirements to marry are
but i have read about cases of people who's parents wouldn't consent petitioning the courts and receiving their license

and even though i would like to report it i can't
her siblings live there, and they have nowhere else to go
and if i did that and caused them to be split up, i really don't think she would forgive me
anyway i mean they already know she wants to be here and that i want her here, so i mean there's not much more they can do to keep us apart
so the way i see it if there's even the slightest chance then i may as well try

do you know what the process for starting something like that is?
i mean do i just go in and file a motion with the clerk of court or something?
i'm just not sure how that works

 

[Nativity]

There is only one state, that I know of, that will allow a minor to apply for a license without parental consent if they have a child or are expecting and can varify it. But Idaho and NC are not that state.

And even in that state a county court judge may at his/her discretion issue or not issue a license for them to marry.

No matter how many times you reword the question and no matter how much more information you provide you are just not going to find the answer you want to hear. If you believe we are incorrect your best option is to contact either your County Clerk's Office or Idaho's. Or consult with an attorney.

 

[solusipse]

you mean delaware?

and i'm not rewording the question
i wasn't sure if either of our states had that loophole which would have made things significantly easier and now i know we don't
but i also know that the court has the power to grant a marriage license to someone under they age of 18 if they deem it in the minor's best interest(having nothing to do with her having a daughter and everything to do with the fact that conditions for her would be better here)
i mean this part i already knew i would just have to convince a judge to see the same

i just wanted to know who to contact or if there were any forms i needed to get and fill out first
i assumed it would just be going to the clerk of court, but i thought maybe someone here might know the answer to that question

i have noticed that people on this forum have a habit of going more for the "you don't know what you're talking about" approach rather than actually answering the question which is why i think you see so many people getting pissed off including myself in previous threads

i mean i haven't been asking whether there's an easy way out thanks to some loophole
i just wanted to know where to go and who to talk to to file the motion for a hearing