Never had legal custody ALWAYS had physical Custody

What is the name of your state? Nevada

My husband had a child before we were married. The Mother of the child has never had physical custody of the child. The child lived with my husband and his Mother from the time she was 3 weeks old. The Mother of the child would go pick her up for a day or two, but the child has NEVER lived with the biological Mother.

We married when the child was 1 year old and the child has either lived with us or the paternal Grandmother her entire life. No legal custody was ever established, although everyone knew the child lived with my husband and his Mom, or with us once we married.

The Mother caused a lot of problems when we married because she did not want her child around me. However, she never was too worried, because she never wanted the child to live with her.
She caused so much trouble when we first got married, that my husband even asked her to take the child to live with her and she refused. She said the child caused too much trouble for her and her man and she couldn't be bothered with her! As you can tell, she has absolutely no "mothering instinct" at all!

Anyway fast forward 13 years. The child has lived with us all this time. We were living in New Orleans and decided to move to Nevada. My husband talked it over with his child's Mother. She said she did not want her to move with us, BUT she did not want the child to live with her either! She wanted her to stay in New Orleans and live with my husband's Mother! My husband told her "No, my Mom is too old to raise a child, if you want her to stay in La., you will have to let her live with you". The next day after he told her that, she came and brought a suitcase and a few more things over to the house. Basically, she didn't say she wanted her to move with us, but she sure brought the suitcase over and gave it to the child. Now, the crazy Mom, is calling and telling us that she is getting an attorney and suing us for custody!

Sorry, if this is confusing! What I want to know is, if she has a chance of getting a 14 year old that has never lived with her and has no desire to live with her? My step-daughter is actually afraid of her biological Mom, and has no desire to live with her. Her Mother also has another older child, and she has never had physical custody of that child either. She killed the Father of that child (supposedly self defense) and so the Paternal Grandmother has had custody of that child his entire life too!

It makes me angry, because my husband has always tried to let his daughter see her Mother, and actually he has let her get away with a lot of things. She has never contributed any money to support the child, also he has always let her have her on holidays, etc. She basically has run the show, even though my step-daughter has always lived with us. He just wanted her to get to see her Mother, and he is a bit of a wussy I think!

Please tell me what you think we need to do! Do you think she can take her from us after all these years? Did we do something wrong by bringing her here without having legal custody even though she has always lived with my husband.

Thanks

My husband had a child before we were married.

that must have been VERY painful.

Now, to the point.
Has paternity ever been established? If not, do so NOW!

Second, is your husband's name on the birth cirtificate or was he married to the woman when the child was born?

Your husband needs to file IMMEDIATELY for sole legal and residental custody. He needs to do so with an attorney and he needs to start getting nasty.

The child will more than likely be able to testify if required since she is now 14. However, that is not a given.

I would also ask your attorney about providing in the custody petition a move-away stipulation that would allow the child to move with you. This is risky however since the parent moving will more than likely shoulder the transportation costs involved in visitation.