Not Sure If I Can Do Anything About It

[rmoore87]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana

I have a 4yo daughter. Her father is not involved. We were never married. His name is not on her birth certificate because he didn't want to establish paternity at birth. As a matter of fact, he denied being her father after she was born. I know that he is most definitely her father. During the first 2 years of her life, he would sporadically call & set up a day & time to visit w/ her. He never wanted to spend more than 1 hour with her, but then would complain because he never got to see her. He used to threaten to kidnap her just to cause me pain. Despite his threats, I still allowed for him to see her (I never allowed him to see her alone - I was always there). One day, I received a phone call from him. He wanted to see her again. I was tired of him calling at the last minute to make plans to see her. It was like he thought I could just drop everything I was doing and take her to our agreed destination. I finally gained the courage to tell him that we needed to establish paternity & set up visitation & support. That way, he could see her on a regular basis. He told me he didn't want to do that; that there was no need to get the legal system involved. I told him that it had to be done. It wasn't fair to her. She wanted to know who her father was & spend time w/ him, but I didn't trust him enough for him to keep her himself. He was an ex convict charged w/ attempted murder, kidnapping, rape, drug dealing, robbery, and animal brutality - or so he has said. After our conversation that day, I have yet to hear from him. That was 2 1/2 years ago. He quit calling. I no longer know of his whereabouts but do know that he still lives in Indianapolis somewhere.

I'm not sure what I can do, if anything. I'm sure that I cannot have his rights terminated unless I terminate mine as well, correct? But does he have any rights since he denied her and never signed her birth certificate, and has never really been an active part of her life? I just need some guidance on what my choices are. Any suggestions on what I should or can do would be greatly appreciated. Is it possible to terminate whatever rights he may have w/o having to terminate mine as well?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

[IsabellaSoriano]

Originally Posted by rmoore87

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana

I have a 4yo daughter. Her father is not involved. We were never married. His name is not on her birth certificate because he didn't want to establish paternity at birth. As a matter of fact, he denied being her father after she was born. I know that he is most definitely her father. During the first 2 years of her life, he would sporadically call & set up a day & time to visit w/ her. He never wanted to spend more than 1 hour with her, but then would complain because he never got to see her. He used to threaten to kidnap her just to cause me pain. Despite his threats, I still allowed for him to see her (I never allowed him to see her alone - I was always there). One day, I received a phone call from him. He wanted to see her again. I was tired of him calling at the last minute to make plans to see her. It was like he thought I could just drop everything I was doing and take her to our agreed destination. I finally gained the courage to tell him that we needed to establish paternity & set up visitation & support. That way, he could see her on a regular basis. He told me he didn't want to do that; that there was no need to get the legal system involved. I told him that it had to be done. It wasn't fair to her. She wanted to know who her father was & spend time w/ him, but I didn't trust him enough for him to keep her himself. He was an ex convict charged w/ attempted murder, kidnapping, rape, drug dealing, robbery, and animal brutality - or so he has said. After our conversation that day, I have yet to hear from him. That was 2 1/2 years ago. He quit calling. I no longer know of his whereabouts but do know that he still lives in Indianapolis somewhere.

I'm not sure what I can do, if anything. I'm sure that I cannot have his rights terminated unless I terminate mine as well, correct? But does he have any rights since he denied her and never signed her birth certificate, and has never really been an active part of her life? I just need some guidance on what my choices are. Any suggestions on what I should or can do would be greatly appreciated. Is it possible to terminate whatever rights he may have w/o having to terminate mine as well?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

since dad has not been established as dad, your child has no father. you are the sole custodian of this child. until dad decides to file to establish paternity/visitation and/ or support, dad has no rights for you to terminate in the first place. you don't need to terminate your rights unless you are trying to give up your child for adoption. (btw, where on earth did you get that info??)

all you have to do is not file for state aid, and dad would not need to be contacted.