parental rights

I have 2 boys who live with their dad, and they are ages 15 & 12. I have absolutely no say so in what goes on in their lives. My ex husband has custody and has had for 9 years. They live 4 hours away from me. I see them as much as I can and I call all the time. I have sent them cards with money and the money is sent back to me saying they can spend it when they are with me. They cannot take anything from my house with them back home, stuff as small as tic tacs. I have bought them thousands of dollars in clothes and their father will not let them take anything home with them. I am not kept informed of anything in their lives such as ballgames, school events, medical records, etc. They are not allowed to call me direct they have to call collect. Their father totally rules all their thoughts. If he does not want me to know something they are not allowed to tell me. It gets worse, but too much to tell. Please tell what my legal rights are. Also if he does not feel like bringing them for the visitation, he does'nt. They boys give me some excuse why they don't want to come because it's what their dad wants! Help Me!

Originally posted by okiemom
I have 2 boys who live with their dad, and they are ages 15 & 12. I have absolutely no say so in what goes on in their lives. My ex husband has custody and has had for 9 years. They live 4 hours away from me. I see them as much as I can and I call all the time. I have sent them cards with money and the money is sent back to me saying they can spend it when they are with me. They cannot take anything from my house with them back home, stuff as small as tic tacs. I have bought them thousands of dollars in clothes and their father will not let them take anything home with them. I am not kept informed of anything in their lives such as ballgames, school events, medical records, etc. They are not allowed to call me direct they have to call collect. Their father totally rules all their thoughts. If he does not want me to know something they are not allowed to tell me. It gets worse, but too much to tell. Please tell what my legal rights are. Also if he does not feel like bringing them for the visitation, he does'nt. They boys give me some excuse why they don't want to come because it's what their dad wants! Help Me!

You need to take the father back to mediation or court to have your parental rights enforced. You have rights to all that you have stated herein, and more, but if you don't fight for what is yours, you won't gain anything.

Seek professional advice from an attorney about what you need to do.