Pets during and after breakup

[lbennett76]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TN

I am in the process of breaking up with my long term, live in boyfriend. I'm planning on moving out of state at the beginning of next month, however for the time being we are still living in the same house. My issue is, the only thing we are fighting over is who gets our animals. We have two dogs, one we've had for 4 years, and one we've had a year.

With regards to both dogs, I wanted them, found them, called about them, picked them up and paid for them, took them to vet visits, and to get their rabies shots every year.

Things are starting to get very ugly at our house and I'm to the point where the next time he's at work I'm boxing up what I can't replace and what I don't want to have to replace and stay with a friend until I work out my notice at work. My question is, I have a friend who is willing to take my dogs in for the next few weeks until I'm done and can move, if I do this, I'll have to do it while he is at work. Is there any retaliation he can do legally?

I know this probably isn't the right forum, but I'm not sure which one to put this issue in.

Thanks so much!

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Do you have proof they are yours and not his or jointly owned?

 

[lbennett76]

The only actual "proof" I'd have is I'm the only one on record at the vet's office and their rabies registration is in my name only. I found both of them on craigslist, so there isn't any "official" record anywhere of my purchasing them.

And thanks for the reply!

 

[LdiJ]

The only actual "proof" I'd have is I'm the only one on record at the vet's office and their rabies registration is in my name only. I found both of them on craigslist, so there isn't any "official" record anywhere of my purchasing them.

And thanks for the reply!

Well, he would have even less proof that the dogs were his than you would, so I would say go for it.

 

[lbennett76]

Well, he would have even less proof that the dogs were his than you would, so I would say go for it.

Thanks, Ldij, that is kind of what I was thinking, but wanted to make sure I wasn't missing anything before I actually did it.

 

[nextwife]

May I suggest you strongly consider the dogs themselves and who they are most bonded to? Most dogs have a favored person in the household, a person who is "their person". If you are sitting in one room and STBX in the other, where will each dog voluntarily go on their own? Perhaps you should consider what their bond is and what works best for them. This is not exactly legal advice, but unless one is a breeder or competitor with dogs, dogs are about emotions, not money, anyway. Our current dog is "my dog", but our now passed elder dog was very much my husband's dog. It would have been unfair to that dog, had we split, to take him from the person he was truly bonded to.

 

[lbennett76]

May I suggest you strongly consider the dogs themselves and who they are most bonded to? Most dogs have a favored person in the household, a person who is "their person". If you are sitting in one room and STBX in the other, where will each dog voluntarily go on their own? Perhaps you should consider what their bond is and what works best for them. This is not exactly legal advice, but unless one is a breeder or competitor with dogs, dogs are about emotions, not money, anyway. Our current dog is "my dog", but our now passed elder dog was very much my husband's dog. It would have been unfair to that dog, had we split, to take him from the person he was truly bonded to.

I actually have. He has not, and honestly I'm not even 100% sure if he's so determined to keep them because he REALLY wants and loves them, or if he's trying to hurt me. I know they love him, but I would say they are more bonded to me. When we are both home, one of us is always in the bedroom and one of us is always in the living room, the dogs will stay in whichever room I am in. If I sleep in the bedroom, they sleep on the bed with me, if I sleep on the couch, they are on the floor next to me (or on the couch, for one of them). You are exactly right, they aren't show dogs, they are our pets, and I really am trying to do what is best for everyone, including them. I'm thinking hard about it, and if I feel like this will be too much upheaval in their lives, then I will let him keep them.

I decided not to move while he's not home, things have calmed down a bit, so I have some time to really think through what is best for both the dogs.

Thanks so much!