reversal of quardianship question

What is the name of your state? PA
A 26 yr. old woman lives on her own in her own apartment, not group home, cooks for herself, does her laundry, etc. She is on SSI. Mother used intimidation to force the woman to "give over?" guardianship to the mother several years ago. She said she fought with mother not to do this, but was told she "had" to. Woman wants to marry. While her future husband is on SSI also, he works part time at a job he has had for 5 years at a grocery store. He is very good with caring for himself. Living arrangements for the couple are covered. This marriage would be a good situation for both of them. Her mother has agreed to "allow" her to get engaged at Christmas and marry in the summer. But if the woman doesn’t, for example, put her laundry away in HER apartment for half an hour, doesn’t sleep well b/c neighbors made noise all night, then Mother says there probably won’t be a wedding. Not logical things on mother’s part. SMALL SAMPLE. She handles this couple like a YOYO. The young woman is a high functioning person. How hard is it to reverse this guardianship and POA. Could she and her fiancé` just get married, run off? I wrote in detail how controlling the mother was last week but no one replied, so I won't go into detail now. Need some input. Thanks.

well, not to sound rude but, in my opinion anyone who lets someone totally control them like that must need poa. apparently she should have run off along time ago and chooses not too, or just isnt bright enough to make that decision.

If you had read last weeks entry you would perhaps understand. All of her life has been controlled by the mother. They live in a rural community where there is no employment for her. She does want to leave, but is afraid. Hence, my questions. You may not know much about PA ... there are more people here who think of this as the United States of PA rather than a PART of the USA. I am wondering how the mother got a judge to go along with this. The young woman has a case worker, who is also her job coach, who wonders ALSO, but she is not in a position to say anything. Having grown up in a very controlled house, to the point of abuse, (but hey, no one listened, b/c IT DOESN'T happen, not in the '70's, not in the U.S. of PA) I understand how easily a young person can be intimidated and controlled. And much of it happens in rural areas. So my question still stands .... can she just get married w/o mothers approval? My fear is that when the mom finds out that the daughter is trying to regain her independence, the mother will use her "power" to take her away.

And .... They are Seventh Day Adventists and we are just "heathen" Christians who go to church on Sunday. Our beliefs are the same as theirs with the exception of the day of worship. I don’t have a problem with them, and I make sure my son gets to church with them, and he is prepared to do ALL they ask, just to have Donna as his wife. And while the mother says they are meant for each other, she plays games with their heads. The mother and Dad recently paid for a big wedding for their 38-year-old son to marry an 18-year-old girl from South America that he had known for 4 months. Yeah, some things are still screwy and back woodsy here.

you dont have to "let me in" on the whole abuse thing. been there done that. got away fromit. was controlled then and id be damned if i EVER let someone control me again. i grew up and was able to see on my OWN that my life is whatever i make it and noone can decide anything for me but me. this woman you speak of obviously isnt capable of doing the same. only she can decide what she does and wants. if she cannot do so, like i said before maybe poa is what she needs. this is just my opinion.

[stealth2]

I don't know a lot about this sort of situation, but you might want to try googling for groups who do advocacy for the mentally handicapped. They might have some input on what the young lady can and cannot legally do. I would think that she would be able to petition the court to reverse the guardianship/POA - but I wouldn't suggest she do so without an attorney for obvious reasons. And advocacy group would likely have info on which lawyers would be able to help and be willing to work out a payment plan (I'm assuming she doesn't have access to a lot of cash).

Good luck to her and your son - it's very heartwarming.

Thank you, stealth2. I have checked phone book and found an agency called PA. Protection and Advocacy. I will call them. I realize it is hard for a younger person to understand that this control thing still goes on, but it does. Her problem is a learning disability, same as my son's, but he has a seizure disorder on top of that. It's controlled by meds.
I am going to do what I can to help them. Thanks again.

[stealth2]

Unfortunately, there are people who will manipulate others for any variety of reasons. When a parent does so to their own child, it's sad. Now, I don't know this young woman's abilities, and it's very possible that she should have someone w/POA for certain decisions. But if she is able to work and live on her own, then she should be permitted to make some decisions on her own.