Sister needs help

My sister has two children by the same man and is pregnant with her third by him. She wants to move to TX from IN. They have never been married and have been living separately for one year. They have never done anything legal as far as custody etc.
Can she move (she has told him her intentions) and would it be better for her to file something in IN or TX after she moves? This man has been abusive to my sister for 9 years.
Thanks for any info.

Originally posted by gna329
My sister has two children by the same man and is pregnant with her third by him. She wants to move to TX from IN. They have never been married and have been living separately for one year. They have never done anything legal as far as custody etc.
Can she move (she has told him her intentions) and would it be better for her to file something in IN or TX after she moves? This man has been abusive to my sister for 9 years.
Thanks for any info.

Do they have a custody/ visitation agreement through the courts? I would advise that she get one prior to moving. If she doesn't have a court order, he can show up at the school or her home in TX and take the children back to his state without any repercussions. Having a signed court order is the smartest way to go. She'll need to contact an attorney in texas when it's final, after she has moved, to have it filed and recognized in that state as well.

She should put her intentions in writing within 45 days of her move, and give it to him, keeping a copy for herself. This way if he decides to go after her for anything, she will have her bases covered.

Thank-you your reply is most helpful.

This man has been abusive to my sister for 9 years.
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If she has any record of the abuse on her such as police reports, his police records, pictures, witnesses, hospital records, have her document everything and make copies. It's almost like becomng your own detective. If she has no proof, it will be hard to prove. If she stayed with him during the abuse and produced three children, it will look bad for her because she stayed in the abusive situation which put the children in danger.

If they are getting along now, things can/will change when she has moved and the best way to CYA is to do it right the first time, by going to court and having everything in order. What may not look important to her may be to an attorney or a Judge, so keep everything and document everything. Have her start a filing system for all of it.

You should see mine! My attorney about died when I showed him my case which is 3" to 4" thick! And I have two portable filers that I can take that are full. Of course I've been doing this for 8 years, since my daughter was born.

Have a free consultation with an attorney (several of them) in your area.



[Edited by Ukiah on 02-22-2001 at 11:24 AM]

Unfortunately the only time she called the police she later dropped the charges. He has not been abusive to her since she asked him to move out and this is the first time she has found the strength to have asked him to move out. I will pass along the information and hopefully she will have the courage to act on it.
Thanks again