Step Parent adoption

What is the name of your state? Ohio

I have posted before about a last name change for my minor children...thanks for the help *smiles* I have another question though.....

This is kind of long, PLEASE bare with me**************

My present husband wants to adopt my girls, but their bio father wont hear of it, even though he doesn't seem to want anything to do with them unless it is handed to him. he is moving about 30 mins away from us and I don't plan on going to his house at all and besides the girls don't want to see him anyway (they are 8 & 10). The divorce papers say reasonable visitation then in parenthasis it says (unless domestic violence) (oh by the way the divorce was filed and finalized in the state of California. I ended up with sole legal and sole physical custody.)
My girls were at thier bio fthr's for a weekend visit and happened to see their bio fthr hit his girlfriend and make her cry. He has also put his hand over my daughters' nose and mouth (playing he says) but wont let them go when they want to be let go and they get scared. I found out about this and didn't call the police or CPS because he said he was just joking (I know better, but it would be hard to prove) so I decided to let the girls decide when they wanted to see him and then it would be supervised at that point. well they decided to visit but only because they have a half sister over there who is 1 yr old and they wanted to see her not him. There is no child suport ordered and I have not gone after it. one question is, what does this mean, "reasonable visitation (unless domestic violence)"? Does what happened give me the right to make supervised visits? and also is there a way that my husband can adopt my girls without their bio fathers concent? any help would be appreciated. Thank you in advance. (sorry about the rambling)

Wore down in Ohio.....

[Shay-Pari'e]

There is no chance of step dad adopting. He does not want to give up his rights, and, as well he shouldn't.

[stealth2]

Unless you have documented proof, it's unlikely you can use that as a way of withholding visitation. Although your order says "reasonable" and you can technically deny him time with them, you should expect that he will then file for (at the very least) a modification of the visitation order to provide for specific visitation times/dates.

And no, your husband cannot adopt w/o your ex's consent or a court order - and a judge is unlikely to order it over bioDad's objections.

I don't have documented proof and the word of my girls I guess wouldn't be good enough? as for him filing for visitation, well I don't think he will, he hasn't yet. He is just not wanting to sign papers because of spite. I guess he loves them in his own way I would hope so but I just don't know. I just get sooooo frustrated cause he doesn't make any effort to see the girls. The girls don't even call him dad they call him by his real name. he was out of their lives from the age of 2 and 3 and then just popped back up about a year ago. He has been in and out of jail for child support of his other 5 children he has 8 all together. I know I was stupid when I married him. trust me I am reminded frequently. but I have someone who is willing to take on the responsibility of my children and be a daddy to them. he has never had kids before and is finacially stable.(not rich but stable). where as their bio has no job wont get a job and is living off his girlfriend and her job. He slaps her around and I know this from other people but mostly from my girls and what they have told me. I really don't think they need to be in an enviornment like that. they had to witness that the first 2 and 3 yrs of their lives when I was married to him. there has got to be something I could do. there has just got to be. I love my girls very much and I do my best not to degrade their bio, but they have come to their own conclusion, they don't want to be a part of his life and they are scared that their half sister is going to be hurt. I try and tell them that "he never laid a hand on you when you were small so your sister is just fine." but I don't think they really believe me, beacuse of him putting his hand over teir mouth and nose so they can't breath. he slapped my oldest in the back of the head one day them put his had over her nose and mouth and then perceded to tell her that he could get a lot meaner. all because she said she didnt' like hot dogs unless they were cut up in mac and cheese or pork n beans (which is very true). when she came home and told me, that is when the visits stopped and I made them supervised. I dont' want to get in trouble with the courts for not letting them go see him. but it is really not me letting them, it is they just don't want to. *sighs*
I like this site thanks for all the shoulders out there. I really don't have an outside vent. this is great. thanks to you all. and again any info or feedback would be great.....

[stealth2]

The thing is, 8 & 10 yo's don't make those sorts of decisions, so you'd be the one who would get in hot water if the judge felt you were out of line (and a judge might not - it's impossible to predict).