Surrogacy

[NuOHScout]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

If this does not belong in this section, please let me know. This was the only area I could think of to put it. And the reason I thought to put it here, is if because it is not done correctly...it could end up a family law (custody/visitation/support) case.

I know someone who would like to have a child. He has decided to go the surrogacy route, but privately (finding his own surrogate vs an agency). He has asked me if I would be willing to do it. The catch is, I would be the egg donor and the surrogate.

How do we go about this correctly, so I end up just being the egg donor and surrogate? So that after the baby is born, he is the only one with rights and responsibilities? I know if done incorrectly, I could still be taken to court for custody and child support, regardless of what he and I had agreed on. Especially if he ever needed public assistance (very unlikely, but that does not mean anything). On the flip side of that, I could also take him to court for custody/child support, regardless of what we had agreed to.

So...how do we go about this, and make it 100% legit...so that I am only the surrogate when all is said and done?

 

[single317dad]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

If this does not belong in this section, please let me know. This was the only area I could think of to put it. And the reason I thought to put it here, is if because it is not done correctly...it could end up a family law (custody/visitation/support) case.

I know someone who would like to have a child. He has decided to go the surrogacy route, but privately (finding his own surrogate vs an agency). He has asked me if I would be willing to do it. The catch is, I would be the egg donor and the surrogate.

How do we go about this correctly, so I end up just being the egg donor and surrogate? So that after the baby is born, he is the only one with rights and responsibilities? I know if done incorrectly, I could still be taken to court for custody and child support, regardless of what he and I had agreed on. Especially if he ever needed public assistance (very unlikely, but that does not mean anything). On the flip side of that, I could also take him to court for custody/child support, regardless of what we had agreed to.

So...how do we go about this, and make it 100% legit...so that I am only the surrogate when all is said and done?

I do not recommend you go forward with this plan. At some point in your life, you're going to regret the decisions you're about to make (maybe very soon).

However, if you insist and feel you must go forward, my strong recommendation is that you both retain attorneys. Will the injection be made medically or via the traditional method? Does the potential father have a partner, preferably a wife?

It is possible to birth a child then simply wash your hands of it and walk away legally cleansed in the right set of circumstances, but if you make a mistake it could come back to haunt you many times over. Get the lawyers, one for each of you. If Dad has the money to afford a surrogate and a child, then two lawyers shouldn't be a problem.

 

[Ohiogal]

I do not recommend you go forward with this plan. At some point in your life, you're going to regret the decisions you're about to make (maybe very soon).

However, if you insist and feel you must go forward, my strong recommendation is that you both retain attorneys. Will the injection be made medically or via the traditional method? Does the potential father have a partner, preferably a wife?

It is possible to birth a child then simply wash your hands of it and walk away legally cleansed in the right set of circumstances, but if you make a mistake it could come back to haunt you many times over. Get the lawyers, one for each of you. If Dad has the money to afford a surrogate and a child, then two lawyers shouldn't be a problem.

If he impregnates her the "traditional method" that is NOT a surrogacy arrangement.

 

[NuOHScout]

I do not recommend you go forward with this plan. At some point in your life, you're going to regret the decisions you're about to make (maybe very soon).

However, if you insist and feel you must go forward, my strong recommendation is that you both retain attorneys. Will the injection be made medically or via the traditional method? Does the potential father have a partner, preferably a wife?

It is possible to birth a child then simply wash your hands of it and walk away legally cleansed in the right set of circumstances, but if you make a mistake it could come back to haunt you many times over. Get the lawyers, one for each of you. If Dad has the money to afford a surrogate and a child, then two lawyers shouldn't be a problem.

We have not decided on what method to use yet. We wanted to see what to do to make this legally viable first, before we chose a method. Especially since we saw a news article about a guy who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple, and was later taken to court by the Job & Family Services after the lesbian couple needed to sign up for public assistance. What bit the buy in the azz on that is that they did not go through a licensed physician and the insemination done medically.

The potential father does not have a wife. He is seeking the surrogate because he went through a divorce, at least 5 years ago, because his wife cheated on him. He feels he is getting older, and would like a child(ren) before he feels he gets too old.

I will mention the lawyers suggestion to him.

 

[NuOHScout]

If he impregnates her the "traditional method" that is NOT a surrogacy arrangement.

So, basically we would need to go through a physician and medical fertilization, along with some type of legal documents route?

 

[Just Blue]

We have not decided on what method to use yet. We wanted to see what to do to make this legally viable first, before we chose a method. Especially since we saw a news article about a guy who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple, and was later taken to court by the Job & Family Services after the lesbian couple needed to sign up for public assistance. What bit the buy in the azz on that is that they did not go through a licensed physician and the insemination done medically.

The potential father does not have a wife. He is seeking the surrogate because he went through a divorce, at least 5 years ago, because his wife cheated on him. He feels he is getting older, and would like a child(ren) before he feels he gets too old.

I will mention the lawyers suggestion to him.

Neither of you seem... able... to do this without attorney's, one for you and one for him.

 

[xylene]

This seems like a terrible idea or some kind of bad pick-up line and you should turn down this guy.

 

[single317dad]

If he impregnates her the "traditional method" that is NOT a surrogacy arrangement.

That's why I asked the question.

 

[Ladyback1]

ya know?
If your friend is really wanting to be a "Daddy", might I be so bold as to suggest he explore adoption of a child in the foster system?
Yes, single men can and do adopt. Yes, it can be a difficult and sometimes long process.
But you know what? Raising an adopted child is usually no different than a biological child.

The whole argument of "I want the child to have my genes" is really kind of silly to me...

 

[Zigner]

A quick Google search using the phrase Surrogacy in Ohio yields a plethora of results.

 

[Just Blue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ohio

If this does not belong in this section, please let me know. This was the only area I could think of to put it. And the reason I thought to put it here, is if because it is not done correctly...it could end up a family law (custody/visitation/support) case.

I know someone who would like to have a child. He has decided to go the surrogacy route, but privately (finding his own surrogate vs an agency). He has asked me if I would be willing to do it. The catch is, I would be the egg donor and the surrogate.

How do we go about this correctly, so I end up just being the egg donor and surrogate? So that after the baby is born, he is the only one with rights and responsibilities? I know if done incorrectly, I could still be taken to court for custody and child support, regardless of what he and I had agreed on. Especially if he ever needed public assistance (very unlikely, but that does not mean anything). On the flip side of that, I could also take him to court for custody/child support, regardless of what we had agreed to.

So...how do we go about this, and make it 100% legit...so that I am only the surrogate when all is said and done?

Scout,

A bunch of Members here have basically said the same thing. If you have taken the time to review a few threads you will see that is not typical for these members (me included).

Hire an attorney to protect your rights and the potential baby's rights.

 

[NuOHScout]

Thank you everyone. I have given all information to this person, but I have let him know I am opting out, and that I do not want to be the surrogate or egg donor. Thank you so much.