Unmarried Father advice needed!!

[Dancingchia]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oregon


So the situation is this... My brother has a baby girl and lives with his girlfriend. She has a history of alcohol abuse and is pretty mentally unstable. Yesterday she decided to tell my brother he has 30days to leave their home and she is planning on taking their daughter to Mexico on a trip with some man from work. They are not married and we live in Oregon which is a huge MOM state. He does not work and is the stay at home Dad while his girlfriend is working. So he has no money and no place to go. What does he need to do?? Can he take his daughter and go stay with our parents or would he get into trouble for taking her? Would she get into trouble for taking the baby?? HELP!!

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oregon


So the situation is this... My brother has a baby girl and lives with his girlfriend. She has a history of alcohol abuse and is pretty mentally unstable.

I doubt she's considered unfit though.

Yesterday she decided to tell my brother he has 30days to leave their home and she is planning on taking their daughter to Mexico on a trip with some man from work.

She's probably allowed to do that.

They are not married and we live in Oregon which is a huge MOM state.

Oh no, it's really not.

He does not work and is the stay at home Dad while his girlfriend is working. So he has no money and no place to go. What does he need to do?? Can he take his daughter and go stay with our parents or would he get into trouble for taking her? Would she get into trouble for taking the baby?? HELP!!

Is he LEGALLY established as the child's father?

 

[Dancingchia]

I doubt she's considered unfit though.




She's probably allowed to do that.



Oh no, it's really not.



Is he LEGALLY established as the child's father?

He is on the birth certificate.
They live in a shake behind his girlfriends moms house, it has no running water or a bathroom. They have a wood stove for heat at least.

 

[Proserpina]

He is on the birth certificate.
They live in a shake behind his girlfriends moms house, it has no running water or a bathroom. They have a wood stove for heat at least.

Okay.

Then Mom will likely need approval for the child's passport. Having said that, it won't be difficult to obtain.

Why on earth is Dad being so against her going on vacation? Is it because she's found a new guy?

 

[Dancingchia]

Okay.

Then Mom will likely need approval for the child's passport. Having said that, it won't be difficult to obtain.

Why on earth is Dad being so against her going on vacation? Is it because she's found a new guy?

Its hard to explain his unapproval without knowing her character. They are still in this relationship and shes planning on running off with some random guy. She wants to be "unattached" and be able to do what she likes without being tied down. Which yes, is fine for anyone to want to do. They fight everyday, and it gets very heated. I have once had to call the police on her for threatening to kill herself and she was taken to the hospital and stayed for a few days. She has refused further treatment. Shes an alcoholic and supposedly doesnt care for thier daughter well, im not there so i dont know how much of an unfit mother she is or is not. I just know my brother is a good father... She is not planning on brining the baby back or is threatening to take her and stay in Mexico

 

[Proserpina]

Its hard to explain his unapproved without know her character. She wants to be "unattached" and be able to do what she likes without being tied down.

Okay.

Which yes, is fine for anyone to want to do. They fight everyday, and it gets very heated.

It takes TWO people to fight.

I have once had to call the police on her for threatening to kill herself and she was taken to the hospital and stayed for a few days. She has refused further treatment. Shes an alcoholic and supposedly doesnt care for thier daughter well, im not there so i dont know how much of an unfit mother she is or is not. I just know my brother is a good father... She is not planning on brining the baby back or is threatening to take her and stay in Mexico

Okay - help your brother help himself.

Have him come here and sign up.

Thanks!

 

[Dancingchia]

Okay.



It takes TWO people to fight.




Okay - help your brother help himself.

Have him come here and sign up.

Thanks!

Yes, you're right it does take two. He and I dont have the greatest relationship so advising him on anything and ahving him follow through is very slim. Why cant i get the answeres to the questions?

 

[Proserpina]

Yes, you're right it does take two. He and I dont have the greatest relationship so advising him on anything and ahving him follow through is very slim. Why cant i get the answeres to the questions?

1. It's not your business.

2. See #1.

If he isn't worried about it, and won't talk to you anyway, AND you don't know what's actually going on? See where I'm coming from?

 

[Dancingchia]

1. It's not your business.

2. See #1.

If he isn't worried about it, and won't talk to you anyway, AND you don't know what's actually going on? See where I'm coming from?

Wow okay... i was just trying to find a way to help my brother

 

[TheGeekess]

Wow okay... i was just trying to find a way to help my brother

And you've been told how to help your brother.

 

[Proserpina]

Wow okay... i was just trying to find a way to help my brother

Hon, I understand that - I really do.

But you've already said that not only will he likely NOT listen, but also that you don't have the relevant facts.

This is, really, HIS mess. Let him deal with it.

We're here 24/7. It's not a slur against you - it's actually an invitation for him to come here so we can try to help him!

 

[Dancingchia]

Hon, I understand that - I really do.

But you've already said that not only will he likely NOT listen, but also that you don't have the relevant facts.

This is, really, HIS mess. Let him deal with it.

We're here 24/7. It's not a slur against you - it's actually an invitation for him to come here so we can try to help him!

Alright, well thank you. Im just really worried for my neice. But I will have my parents try to talk him into coming on here.

Ive never ehard of this site before and just today signed on. If i have questions on my daughter can i ask you here or should I go make a new thread?

 

[Proserpina]

Alright, well thank you. Im just really worried for my neice. But I will have my parents try to talk him into coming on here.

Ive never ehard of this site before and just today signed on. If i have questions on my daughter can i ask you here or should I go make a new thread?

Oh by all means start another thread for your situation

We'll be happy to try and help as best we can!