FreeAdvice Legal Forum - Conversation Between Proserpina and JoLo0808

Conversation Between Proserpina and JoLo0808

Showing Visitor Messages 1 to 7 of 7

09-24-2009 06:20 PM
Proserpina

Oh heck - I forgot why I was outraged and wanting to PM you....it'll come back to me
09-24-2009 06:04 PM
JoLo0808

lol - took me a while to find where to do that... you'd think I'd be smarter with profile controls being a webmaster and all...
08-19-2009 07:31 PM
Proserpina

OK now I'm actually outraged (don't worry, it's on your behalf lol). Turn on your PM function
08-19-2009 06:54 PM
Proserpina

Absolutely! I think the best step-parent in the world is the one who loves the spouse, understands that neither parent is perfect, adores the step-kids and knows when to keep their mouth shut
Seriously though, rules in court? Don't disparage the other parent. Ever. Support your spouse, tell the truth and make it crystal clear that parenting their child is *their* job and you would never even think of interfering. In fact the thought hadn't even crossed your mind! That would just be...well..wrong, right?

You'll do just fine. And please, feel free to ask your questions whenever you feel the need.
08-19-2009 01:18 PM
JoLo0808

Very much! Thank you. So, if this ends up going to trial, and for some reason I am called to testify, be very careful to show support not only for my husband, but for them co-parenting without my interference - right?
08-18-2009 07:33 PM
Proserpina

I think for the most part, most half-decent steps just want to support their spouse and the child/ren. Sometimes though a step will insert his/herself into the legal matters of the parents where s/he has absolutely no place.

If the parent and/or the step-parent decide to undermine the other parent in any way (Referring to themselves as the real, or only, parents; as Mom, Dad , "we" this, "us" that) it has resulted in custody being modified....in the other parent's favor. It's often frustrating being the step-parent - but it's a lot easier once it sinks in that the step is NOT the parent, has no authority over the child (or the other parent for that matter) and knows when to speak up (if the child is being abused or something) and when to shut up (in the courtroom).
Usurping the parent's role is one of the fastest and most effective ways to lose custody.

(did that help at all?)
08-18-2009 07:00 PM
JoLo0808

Hi - I saw a post you left about over-stepping in a custody case... just wanted to get your opinion about how involved I should be in my husband's case. His 14-yr old son wants to move here and our attorney says we have a really good chance. I don't want to do anything that might jeopardize his case, so any advice you can pass my way would be much appreciated!
Thank you!
LJO