Adultery in the Navy

[jfgsr90]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Greetings,
my name is John. I am suffering from PTSD and I retired from the US Army with 22 years of service. I dealing with other health issues right now but I cannot think clearly. My wife who is active duty stationed in Djibouti in the Navy just sent me email saying she had an affair with an officer or senior enlisted in her Chain of Command. She is a E-6 in the Navy. She ask for a uncontested divorce. Honestly, I am hurting so much I cannot think clearly but I want her and her lover to be punish. I know in the Army there is severe punishment for Adultery because I use to council soldiers down range when receive these Dear John letters. My wife keeps all the BAH, her money, and I have to pay all the bills out my little retirement. She said she does have to tell me who it is and if I take her to court she will just deny it. However, I have her confession on email so I do not understand her pride, arrogance, and confidence. I am hurting physically, and mentally right now. My wife keep sending these ugly emails. I plan to go to Fort Benning, or Fort Gordon, GA legal office with all these emails on Monday. I do not want her getting any of my retirement because we only been married six years with no children. Please thanks for any advice.
I cannot sleep so I will check for your response,
thanks.

John....

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

I cannot help you with your marriage issue, however I suggest you consider EMDR for your PTSD. I know people who have been treated successfully.

EMDR International Association

 

[Sean.k.B]

John,

First let me say that I am sorry for you situation. As a ex-solider that had a spouse commit adultery, I share your pain. 2nd, by all means please do not let this affect your life as it is currently. You need to move past this and find someone else to share your life with.

Lastly and the reason you came here. This is how you can get the whore back.

In my situation, I talked to the MPs and had the other guy (who was a soldier) charged under Article 134 (Adultery) of the UCMJ. Article 134 applies for both a married soldier (your wife) and/or a soldier who is single that knowingly has an affair with a married person (the other guy). To put it simple both can bu charged under Article 134. To proceed with this, I would take as MANY avenues as you can to enforce this. But before you do that. Try to record her having an affair over the phone, or even better video tape her admitting it in person. I had a case where emails proved useless as the person sending an email in one case claimed that his account was hacked and someone else sent the emails. It could not be proven either way so it was thrown out of court.

1st. Contact your local JAG office.
2nd. Contact your wifes ENTIRE chain of command (GO ALL THE WAY TO A GENERAL/ADMIRAL officers)
3rd Contact the other persons chain of command (GO ALL THE WAY TO A GENERAL/ADMIRAL officers)
4th. Contact your spouses SP/MP unit.
5th. Contact the other persons SP/MP unit (if he is on another base)
6th. Contact your Congressman.

In my case the it wasn't until I moved past the Brigade Commander (a full bird COL) that anyone took action. After a General got wind of the it, EVERYONE single person acted on it and the person was demoted.

Lastly, your retirement benefits has nothing to do with the military. That would have to be handled in civilian court.

Good Luck.

 

[Zigner]

John,

First let me say that I am sorry for you situation. As a ex-solider that had a spouse commit adultery, I share your pain. 2nd, by all means please do not let this affect your life as it is currently. You need to move past this and find someone else to share your life with.

Lastly and the reason you came here. This is how you can get the whore back.

In my situation, I talked to the MPs and had the other guy (who was a soldier) charged under Article 134 (Adultery) of the UCMJ. Article 134 applies for both a married soldier (your wife) and/or a soldier who is single that knowingly has an affair with a married person (the other guy). To put it simple both can bu charged under Article 134. To proceed with this, I would take as MANY avenues as you can to enforce this. But before you do that. Try to record her having an affair over the phone, or even better video tape her admitting it in person. I had a case where emails proved useless as the person sending an email in one case claimed that his account was hacked and someone else sent the emails. It could not be proven either way so it was thrown out of court.

1st. Contact your local JAG office.
2nd. Contact your wifes ENTIRE chain of command (GO ALL THE WAY TO A GENERAL/ADMIRAL officers)
3rd Contact the other persons chain of command (GO ALL THE WAY TO A GENERAL/ADMIRAL officers)
4th. Contact your spouses SP/MP unit.
5th. Contact the other persons SP/MP unit (if he is on another base)
6th. Contact your Congressman.

In my case the it wasn't until I moved past the Brigade Commander (a full bird COL) that anyone took action. After a General got wind of the it, EVERYONE single person acted on it and the person was demoted.

Lastly, your retirement benefits has nothing to do with the military. That would have to be handled in civilian court.

Good Luck.

Or, our OP could simply divorce the woman instead of focusing and narrowing his anger, thus allowing it to fester and grow...

 

[Sean.k.B]

OP please block the troll above, every time I've posted on here he's made comments that aid the OPs question in anyway.



Troll,
OP asked if there was anything that he could do against his wife regarding Adultery. I answered it factually based on my OWN experience regarding the Article as outlined in the UCMJ. I wouldn't expect you to understand the military life style or its values.... especially integrity or honor.

 

[ecmst12]

That doesn't change the fact that focusing on revenge and punishing the ex and her boyfriend is not healthy for OP emotionally.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

It is however enforcing the code/regulations she opted to live under.

 

[Zigner]

It's an avenue for our OP to seek revenge.

If the cheating spouse were on here asking questions, I'd definitely have an ear-full (eye-full?) for her...but she's not.

 

[Zigner]

Troll,
OP asked if there was anything that he could do against his wife regarding Adultery. I answered it factually based on my OWN experience regarding the Article as outlined in the UCMJ. I wouldn't expect you to understand the military life style or its values.... especially integrity or honor.

For a "minister", you sure seem focused on revenge. I figured you'd be more focused on forgiveness and healing...

 

[csi7]

I would be reporting this to the chain of command, and it is not revenge. It is a matter of justice since it is "expected" of everyone, including dependents, to follow the standards.
This type of adultery is dangerous as a person who may need help might be denied it due to exposure of the affair to the command.

 

[Shadowbunny]

OP, I'm sorry you're having to go through this. If you're not already seeking treatment for your PTSD, please find your local Vet Center. They specialize in PTSD, grief, combat stress, etc. Vet Center Home

Regarding your wife, while I can understand your rage at the adultery, you may get more immediate results by contacting her chain of command in regards to her refusal to provide financially for you. If her CoC doesn't cooperate, you can always utilize the Navy's Ombudsman person: Ombudsman. Of course, you can also lodge a complaint with the Navy IG. This is a good site with information about what dependents can do in cases of non-suppport: Complaints (Support)

Best of luck to you.

 

[asiny]

John,

First let me say that I am sorry for you situation. As a former-solider that had a spouse commit adultery, I share your pain. 2nd, by all means please do not let this affect your life as it is currently. You need to move past this and find someone else to share your life with.

I corrected that for you.
As an "ex-solider" you should know that any member of the military considers being referred to as ex- is a slap in the face.

 

[umkemesic]

Adultry is a serious crime in the military and is bad for morale and discipline, especially when it is service member to service member. I would collect all the emails you can and any additional evidence of an affair.

In order to help YOURSELF out in the future divorce proceedings it will be benificial to have the military investigate your wife (which they will be happy to do, especially if it is an officer cheating with her). They love fraternization cases.

Also they are likely to put pressure on your wife to admit her guilt and interview others who know about the affair (trust me, it won't be a secret while deployed - you should know that as well).

Sorry for your lost.