Article 134 advice please

[VirginiaSlim]

My husband , who is an O-4, had an affair while TDY last year. The woman contacted me a month after it ended saying she was pregnant. He admitted to the affair when confronted. She continued to harass him and me until he finally had to have his number changed. I am not sure what her motive was but she sent an email to IG and an Article 134 investigation was started. She has since contacted me saying she was sorry and she knew he was married. My question, it has been almost 90 days since the investigation started, not surprisingly my husband and I are not doing so well. He said the investigation was complete he was just waiting to hear the punishment. I believe he has already been told but isn't telling me. Is there anyway I can find out? Am I allowed to call his commander and ask? I have stayed completely out of the entire investigation, as far as the army knows, I know nothing of the affair. I am also a civilian with four kids to think about. Any information would be greatly appreciated

 

[Ohiogal]

My husband , who is an O-4, had an affair while TDY last year. The woman contacted me a month after it ended saying she was pregnant. He admitted to the affair when confronted. She continued to harass him and me until he finally had to have his number changed. I am not sure what her motive was but she sent an email to IG and an Article 134 investigation was started. She has since contacted me saying she was sorry and she knew he was married. My question, it has been almost 90 days since the investigation started, not surprisingly my husband and I are not doing so well. He said the investigation was complete he was just waiting to hear the punishment. I believe he has already been told but isn't telling me. Is there anyway I can find out? Am I allowed to call his commander and ask? I have stayed completely out of the entire investigation, as far as the army knows, I know nothing of the affair. I am also a civilian with four kids to think about. Any information would be greatly appreciated

Question: Do you want to save your marriage? If so, is that because you have four kids to think about? If that is the only reason, reconsider. What if the other woman is pregnant and has his child? Then he will have five children. If she files for child support first, her child will get a bigger chunk of his pay than your child. Why are you letting the army believe you know nothing? Did your husband not tell the investigatory that you know about it? Her motive was that your husband disobeyed miltary regulations. He knew the rules and disregarded them for a quick roll in the hay. Why shouldn't he be investigated and punished?

 

[Shadowbunny]

Of course you're "allowed" to ask his commander, however, chances are he/she won't tell you.

It doesn't surprise me that it's taken 90+ days and still no word of the outcome. I've seen investigations take a year to get to the punishment phase.

For now, I suggest taking advantage of the free counseling offered through Military OneSource. You're entitled to 12 sessions with a civilian therapist in your area. You can also get counseling through the post Chaplain. Another good resources is www.divorcebusting.com.

Good luck to you and your family.