Can I Find Out if My Ex Asked for A Transfer or was Ordered to Transfer?

[harperz87]

North Carolina/My ex has just reenlisted in the military. She has custody of our son. She has always made it difficult for me to have visitation. I just got served today that she must report to Eielson AFB in Alaska. She asks that in order for me to have an ongoing relationship with him that I be permitted 3 weeks in summer and up to one week visitation at winter and spring breaks. She also wants me to kick in half of transportation. That is not even standard visitation. She had family nearby where she is based now in Florida. He isn't even 5 years old. How do I find out if she got orders or asked for the transfer? I suspect the latter. She has always wanted me out of his life so she doesn't have to deal with me. I am remarried, she is not. She has men moving in and out of her home. I need information, please.

 

[cbg]

I don't know if it works this way in every branch of the service or for every job in the Navy, but when my sister was in the Navy every three years or so she would be told to pick out her top three choices for her next assignment, and then later she would be told which of her choices, if any, she had been assigned to. She usually got at least one of her choices but she didn't always get her first choice, and as far as I know she did not have the option of staying put. Again, I do not know if this is an across-the-board answer.

 

[Fuller101]

No

Asked are not it will be reported as an order that is what it is he can only ask to be consiterd and that will not be reported u will have to talk to the chain of command and they my give you that info

 

[Proserpina]

Asked are not it will be reported as an order that is what it is he can only ask to be consiterd and that will not be reported u will have to talk to the chain of command and they my give you that info

Want to try that again in English?

 

[ERAUPIKE]

North Carolina/My ex has just reenlisted in the military. She has custody of our son. She has always made it difficult for me to have visitation. I just got served today that she must report to Eielson AFB in Alaska. She asks that in order for me to have an ongoing relationship with him that I be permitted 3 weeks in summer and up to one week visitation at winter and spring breaks. She also wants me to kick in half of transportation. That is not even standard visitation. She had family nearby where she is based now in Florida. He isn\'t even 5 years old. How do I find out if she got orders or asked for the transfer? I suspect the latter. She has always wanted me out of his life so she doesn\'t have to deal with me. I am remarried, she is not. She has men moving in and out of her home. I need information, please.

You always have the option of taking her to court if you don\'t like the situation.

 

[csi7]

It is every three years, and upon re-enlistment, you submit the top three choices, no guarantees, and it's a complete package for the review board to use for assignments which require x-months availability.

 

[CGRAY]

Orders are orders, requested or not. However, if she did request the orders, you may be able to use that in court to demonstrate that your ex created and is responsible for the increased distance and because of that, argue that she should be the one to pay majority/all of the newly incurred travel cost. It is something I faced myself.

However, as it pertains to finding out if she did request or was just ordered, I don't know. Unless something has changed, her request would have had to gone up the chain of command so I'd assume that someone in her CoC could be subpeoned to testify to this. The information would be relevant and I can't see how it would jeopardize National Security to divulge.

However, if it was not a requested change, I'd imagine the court would order shared travel costs. Change of duty stations are a reality of military life and with that, comes situations such as this.

 

[ERAUPIKE]

Orders are orders, requested or not. However, if she did request the orders, you may be able to use that in court to demonstrate that your ex created and is responsible for the increased distance and because of that, argue that she should be the one to pay majority/all of the newly incurred travel cost. It is something I faced myself.

However, as it pertains to finding out if she did request or was just ordered, I don't know. Unless something has changed, her request would have had to gone up the chain of command so I'd assume that someone in her CoC could be subpeoned to testify to this. The information would be relevant and I can't see how it would jeopardize National Security to divulge.

However, if it was not a requested change, I'd imagine the court would order shared travel costs. Change of duty stations are a reality of military life and with that, comes situations such as this.

If there was no agreement to stay within so many miles of each other or for the child to remain CONUS, there would be no legal precedence for the mother to pay more than the original agreed upon costs of travel.

OP, disregard any legal advice from anyone that cannot spell the legal terms or actions they are describing.