Ex-Spouse and Retirement Pay

[Xrandy]

What is the name of your state? Missouri.

I actually live in California, but I was divorced in Missouri (for what it's worth she lives in Tennessee).

As part of our divorce she recieved 42% of my retirement pay. I recieve the full amount and send her a check for her percentage every month. Because I still have a minor child with her (he is 15) and I want to make visitation as seemless as possible I am always on time with the check.

I want her to submit garnishment paperwork so that I don't have to keep sending a check. In the end it will be easier when it comes to tax prep and honestly, I just get sick and tired of sending her the check every month (long story short: she is a cheater and treated me badly, and made my time in the military hell) I tried once to get her to put in the paperwork and even went so far as to get her certified copies of our marriage certificate and divorce decree as well as the form itself (I even provided a stamped, self-addressed envelope for her to send it in) but she never submitted it.

I am considering after my son is 18, and I don't have to deal with her as far as visitation goes, to force her hand by simply stopping sending her monthly checks.

What, if any, reprocussions could I face?

[SHORTY LONG]

If Child support is Court Ordered, and you fail to comply, then you could be held in contemt of the Court Order.

Contact your locale Child Support Agency and see how you can send it to them or whatever it is you are trying to do.

**If any spelling errors, sorry, spell checker down.

[Xrandy]

Well Shorty I do pay child support but that is seperate from this. I would of course pay child support as directed. But what if I stopped providing her with the retirement percentage?

[IrishLady47]

I wouldn't stop it entirely as then she could file contempt of court on you. I would just start sending it at all different times of the month. And, when she complains, send her again the DD Fm 2293 w/documents to mail in directly to DFAS. Point out that assures her payment wb on time every month.

She must be a real piece of work. Obviously, she is either trying to aggravate you or she's trying to cheat on her taxes.

[Xrandy]

Irishlady,

You don't know the half of it. This is a woman who became furious with me for filing for a divorce while she was living with her boyfriend.

Anyway, I think she simpy wants me to have to write a check to her every month in order to keep some connection. Obviously I feel the opposite.

As far as taxes go she actually has had to claim the income because I provide the amount of payment, her name and SSN on tax forms. I just asked you about this in the alimony thread.

[cyberspook]

Originally Posted by IrishLady47

I wouldn't stop it entirely as then she could file contempt of court on you. I would just start sending it at all different times of the month. And, when she complains, send her again the DD Fm 2293 w/documents to mail in directly to DFAS. Point out that assures her payment wb on time every month.

She must be a real piece of work. Obviously, she is either trying to aggravate you or she's trying to cheat on her taxes.

I agree with Irish Lady. Keeping her wondering when she will get paid has a good strategy to it. A lot of people get to depending on getting money at a certain time of the month/week, when they don't get it they tend to get more compliant when needed.

Wow 42%... I don't know much about alimony but damb isn't that a lot?

[IrishLady47]

Originally Posted by Xrandy

As far as taxes go she actually has had to claim the income because I provide the amount of payment, her name and SSN on tax forms. I just asked you about this in the alimony thread.

Realize that--but you're getting taxed during the year & then deducting when you file. If she would submit the DD Fm 2293, you would only get taxed on your portion. Just easier to my mind.

Originally Posted by cyberspook

Wow 42%... I don't know much about alimony but damb isn't that a lot?

Probably not alimony, but the division of the retirement as a marital asset in the property settlement. I would imagine their marriage and his service overlapped by 17+ years, otherwise it is too much. My SO had a 16 yr overlap, his ex would have gotten 40%, but the judge reduced it to 37.5 since SO took all the joint debt.